Is there room in here for me?

[buzzy]

I joined Baby&bump about three years ago when I was expecting my daughter who is now almost two and a half and I found every one really supportive and helpful.
I never thought that I would have to post in this section
First of all, I would like to say to all of you who have suffered a miscarriage how sorry I am for your loss and that I just want to give you all lots of big for being so brave.

I miscarried nearly three weeks ago at 9 weeks and 4 days. To be honest it wasn't too much of a surprise as I had been having painful cramps and some spotting for about three weeks prior to that and I had an inkling that something was wrong. But... No matter how prepared you think you are for the worst, it is still an awful shock

Anyway, my OH has been very supportive, as has my employer (I am a college teacher) and so has my Nana. However, I can't say the same for my mother
She has read me the riot act and told me that the m/c was my fault as I was over-doing it and now she is urging me to get pregnant as soon as possible as she says that there will be too big an age gap between my daughter and a future sibling.
TBH, I am not ready for another pregnancy right now and getting pregnant is not on my list of things to do in the very immediate future. I am going to give my body a few months off

However, one thing is bugging me and I need to share: I have been bleeding for almost three weeks now. The bleeding kind of stopped (more or less) a few days ago but increased again since yesterday.
I am feeling exhausted, physically and if I could I think I would have to sleep all day long just to stay awake for two or three hours per day
How long did everyone bleed for with their miscarriages? Please don't feel you have to answer. I am really stressed about needing to have a D&C, but I know that I probably need to have one and getting stressed about it isn't helping.

Thanks for listening xxx

 

[slurpie]

Dear buzzy, so sorry for your loss. It is always difficult no matter how 'prepared' we think we are ... we will always be 'hoping' ....

If you are not ready to try again, then don't!! No one can rush you into this. You have to heal first, be mentally and physically fit again before anything! (I am quite surprised it is coming from your mom!!! )

You mentioned that it has been 3 weeks and you are still bleeding? In my case, the doctor advised that if bleeding continued for more than 4 weeks, I should seek medical attention for fear of possible infection, anemic and etc. I think you need to see the doctor to make sure it is complete and to monitor your HCG levels.

The first time I mc, I bleed heavily for a week and a couple of days later, my HCG was back to less than 2.

This time, 2nd mc, I'm not sure as I bleed lightly for a week, then it stopped. Through a scan, the doctor at the hospital said it is 'complete miscarriage' but, well, I'm now worried as my HCG has not come down after one month, remained at low 60-70. Another doctor through scan saw, what he thinks are leftover cells from my MC and I'm on medicine to flush it out via menstruation!!!! BUT, I don't see any heavy bleeding ..... yet! Well, it was just yesterday - I am impatient I guess.

Sorry for ranting on your thread.

I wish you well and I hope WE can put all this behind us as soon as possible.
Hugs and take care.

 

[buzzy]

Hi Slurpie,

I am sorry for your losses. Thank you for taking the time to read my post and to reply

I am quite surprised it is coming from your mom!!!

Yeah... I know.... But my mom is strange and has never heard of the words tact and diplomacy

 

[agreeksmom]

i bled for a long time its normal

 

[B&LsMom]

My son is going to be 3 in December and I get worried about the age gap between him and his future siblings growing too large as I would have been due April 1st had I not lost my little one, putting my son just a few months over 3--if we have a 3rd maybe we will have #2 and #3 close together to make up for the gap lol.

I absolutely believe that you know what is best for you and your body--if you aren't ready to start trying again then take your time!! Our bodies are made to carry babies and leave a full and normal life style while doing so---I can't believe your mother would try to "blame" the miscarriage on you for being busy---that is OUTRAGEOUS, but when you are ready to conceive again and are pregnant--I think you should take FULL ADVANTAGE of help from her so you don't "over do it"--Mom clean the house, take care of my daughter while I get some rest, make dinner for the family for me, etc, etc....THANKS MOM!!

 

[mummy2be123]

firstly I am so sorry for your loss. I always worried about having a miscarriage but I never thought it would happen to me daft as it sounds.

I passed my baby naturally on thursday and more friday night while I was asleep and 2 minutes after i passed my baby on thursday my nan said 'well you should use protection then' n i was like what a thing to say!!!!

I dont know why but I would love to get pregnant again I would get pregnant tomorrow if I could but i know it wont happen as me and my sons dad arent together and this was his baby too but he wanted an abortion

I hope you stop bleeding soon and sorry for your loss xxxxx