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Ladies I need fertility help!

Sasha92

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Ladies I need some mental and physical help. I had a misscarrige at 13 weeks on 16th June 2017 and today I the witch has arrived for the 2nd time and it has broken my heart as I really thought we would catch again first cycle.

What are the best fertility drugs or aids to fall pregnant again? I can't keep getting negative tests it's driving me insane and I've already had to take quite alot of time off work and placed in "suicide watch" but friends family and my work place as I'm not coping with what has happened.

I just want to catch now so I can have my may baby please somebody out there must be able to help me :(
 
:( I wish I had advice for you. I am so sorry for your loss and what you're going through. I, like you, am hopeful we'll fall pregnant again after our miscarriage in the first try (it took us two last time), but I'm trying to prepare myself for it to take longer.

Remember it's entirely normal and likely for it to take 6-12 months for you to conceive. I know that doesn't help, but it doesn't mean anything is wrong, you're just normal.

We had good luck the first time and didn't temp/track CM or anything but I know women on these boards swear by it. The app 'Fertility Friend' is helpful for tracking and can tell you exactly when you'll ovulate to better time BD with your hubby. Timing is everything! I know when we were TTC last time we just did it a lot ha. During my 'fertile window' (which was an estimate based on when my period came), we did it every day, the rest of the month every other day.

Good luck <3
 
I'm so sorry for your loss! I'm up to 7 miscarriages and chems now, but succeeded in having 1 rainbow baby, and we are trying for #2. Alligator is correct -- it's perfectly normal to take 6-12 months to conceive. And while catching it first try after a MC certainly is possible, it's not something that is even remotely close to guaranteed. I understand your frustration and eagerness to have your rainbow (I've been there!), but patience is key. We all get antsy! But keep trying, keep tracking, and it'll happen for you. :) I do love FertilityFriend, and it is totally worth the paid subscription!
 
I feel like tracking and temping just isn't enough I caught ovulation last month. We saw the peak and we was having sex every 2 days and today the witch has come in just so disappointmented. I just want to try Clomid and maybe a HCG shot so I know I ovulate maybe even ovulated more than once to have more of a chance. I just don't know what esle to do anymore.
 
Even under ideal circumstances -- you catch ovulation and BD at the right times -- it's still perfectly normal to take 6-12 months. There is no guarantee that you will get pregnant (and have it stick) even if you do everything exactly the way that you should. I know we're all usually fed this "all it takes is once, you can get pregnant very easily so be careful" stuff growing up, but in reality, getting and staying pregnant can be tricky. Getting a negative after your first time is not a sign that you need to take drastic measures, especially since it was after a MC. Some doctors even recommend waiting up to 3 months to even try again because some women's bodies just aren't ready to get pregnant again right away.
 
So sorry about your loss, I have had 2 chemical pregnancies one in 2008 was our first cycle trying and one in 2010 with both losses while sad I took it as a good sign I can get pregnant and we were hopeful to conceive again but years of trying later no luck however we have fertility issues on both sides he had a slightly low sperm count back then and I have PCOS.

I don't recommend clomid if your ovulating on your own, its is not going to raise the chance of success much when your already ovulating, also it can cause a thinned out uterine lining which increases the risk of chemical pregnancy and can also dry out CM making it more difficult to conceive, and comes with some unwanted side effects, I would just keep trying naturally for now, the PP is correct it can take perfectly healthy couples 6 months to a year to conceive so give it time and I am sure it will happen for you.
 
I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time. I do understand - I had a mc at 8 weeks a few years ago, and two years later (I went back on birth control for quite a while as I couldn't face pregnancy again at first) we had two beautiful children. A few years down the line we decide we want another, and have been ttc for a year now with a number of early losses. It is heartbreaking and awful and you do feel like giving up on literally everything at times.

I think firstly you need to think about whether you do need fertility drugs, are your cycles regular? Do you have an unusually short luteal phase? Do you temp? Take prenatal multivitamins? Have you had your hormones checked to make sure everything is ok in that respect? Have you been checked for any infection like BV? As that can cause miscarriage and can go easily undetected but is easily treated. You can test yourself at home with an over the counter test if you would rather.
Do you suffer with any symptoms of hormonal imbalance?
Do you have any issues with fertile cervical mucus? If so, you can do things like drink more water (this is all I had to do), drink grapefruit juice, take evening primrose oil and there are also fertility lubricants available like Preseed and Concieve Plus. Be careful with any supplements and also fruit juices if you're taking any medications because they can interact, sometimes seriously so always check it out first. I usually use drugs.com for this as they have an interaction checker there.
Relaxation is so important when ttc! The stress hormone cortisol can completely knock out progesterone, and this is essential for a healthy you, and to sustain a pregnancy especially early on, before the placenta can take over. The more stressed out you are, the more impact this will have on your ability to sustain a pregnancy. Try anything you find relaxing; meditating, reading a book, watching something funny on TV, playing a game, colouring in, drawing, just anything that helps take your mind elsewhere. Try breathing techniques when things get overwhelming. Exercise is also important, but don't overdo it.
Eating a healthy balanced diet goes miles in helping you to get pregnant and stay pregnant. There are various books you could look at around this area, but generally avoid sugars, lower caffeine intake, drink a good 2 litres of liquid each day and stay away from tap water unless it's filtered. Make sure you're getting good lean protein and all your good fats, as well as plenty of vegetables and fruits and stick to brown rice and wholemeal pasta, try to avoid too much bread but always make sure it's wholemeal, preferably seeded as well.
Try to eat nuts and seeds too as these are fabulous. Things like almonds, pine nuts, Brazil nuts (don't overdo these as 1-2 contain your RDA of selenium, but you can increase this to 5 during your luteal phase to help support progesterone production), pumpkin seeds, sesame seeds... eat things like probiotic yoghurt as these contain good healthy bacteria for your gut which is essential for your hormone levels.

Generally most things can be helped through diet and a few lifestyle changes, but I would definitely get hormone levels checked out especially if your moods are getting as serious as suicidal ideation. I know how much a miscarriage can impact upon you, but if your hormones are out of balance this will only add to these problems and won't help in the baby making process
 
I had a miscarriage on july 7th at 9 weeks. Im expecting my af sunday or monday because i know when i ovulated. I know im not pregnant though because i would have had s positive test by now. The first af after a miscarriage is really hard. It always reminds me of the emptiness of my womb and how my baby is gone all over again. I was really hoping to get pregnant right away too.
Im trying to look forward and try to get myself excited about hopefully getting pregnant this next cycle but its so hard. The waiting, wishing you were still pregnant, anxiety all is so tough.

Do you have any fertility problems? Did you do anything special to get pregnant last time? Im going to take femara this next cycle which im excited will hopefully produce a good strong ovulation earlier in my cycle. Ttc after a loss is so hard. If you ever want to talk. Im here, send me a pm.
 
Thank you all for your replies!

I don't have any known fertility issues me and SO had been trying for 5 months however he was on anti depressants. I read somewhere around the end of january that they lower sperm count so he stopped taking them and we got pregnant in March (2 cycles later they take about 45 days to come out of your system depending on how long you have been on them) I always get a positive OKP between CD15 and CD19 and my period normally follows 14 days later so I have 31-35day cycles which are within the normal range.

My partner is a body builder so he takes Clomid and was on deca before I lost the baby so I guess it's a wasting game for that to come out of his system. It's been about 56 days since he's taking any steroids now so I'm just hoping this cycle his sperm is good quality. I'm taking Clomid this month CD4-8 To hopefully increase my chances of having a better quality egg or multiple eggs! I would love twins but that isn't my goal. I just want to have a healthy baby! I'm also taking 1500mg of evening primrose untill Oday.

If this doesn't work I have no idea what to do or think. I know they say it can take a healthy couple 6 months however if your charting and BDing every 2 days from CD10-CD24 there's no real reason why 2 healthy adults would taking longer than 3 months

:babydust: to all and hopefully we get the :bfp:
 
In an otherwise healthy couple the chances of conception in any given month are about 33%. The chances of this conception resulting in a chemical or early loss are about 60%, so the chances of a successful pregnancy are actually quite slim and don't really increase as the months go by. If each cycle is the same, and there aren't any changes in anything you're doing, then the chances won't be increased or lessened.
For the majority of healthy couples it can take up to 1-2 years to conceive (and carry to term) successfully. If you're under 35. If you're older than 35 the advice is see your GP after 6 months or a year, I can't remember but it's one or the other.
If there isn't any reason to believe there are any fertility issues then it is a waiting game. Timing is important but it doesn't guarantee success after x amount of time.
If you're healthy the focus on staying that way, but you really do need to try to minimise stress because that's one factor that can seriously hinder the process.
If your partner is taking things that can alter his sperm quality then he needs to focus on stopping and keeping himself in optimum shape fertility wise. You said he's doing that so that's good.
But honestly I wouldn't assume that being healthy will mean you should have become and stayed pregnant after three months because the reality is different. For some it takes a single cycle, for another couple it could take a couple of years.
If you're concerned then there isn't any harm in asking your doctor to check your hormones to make sure things are all good in that respect as they can easily become imbalanced. It's a simple check and one thing you can be reassured by.
You could also take coQ10 for good quality eggs, this is available in health food shops like Holland & Barrett
 
Yeah I have limited patients, I guess I just didn't expect it to be this difficult. I made so much plans during the 12 weeks. I'm just really hoping it happens this month xx
 
I think most of us have limited patience and expect it to happen quickly much of the time, I know I did! It will happen, probably during a cycle you don't think it will. It happens a lot that way, usually when people get stressed with actually trying and stop trying but don't prevent, I think because they relax, it happens
 
That's how it worked for me an DH. I had two miscarriages, one was a double that I had to have a very unpleasant D&C for. I had a month with really strong symptoms and it was a dud. I sort of gave up the next month, had no symptoms, considered myself out. Guess who had a positive pregnancy test that month? :lol: It's hard not to obsess over it, it's why I buy my pregnancy tests by the 50-pack, because I know I will agonize over it and end up in tears every failed month. But you have to do what you can to distract yourself and try not to stress it too much. Easier said than done, I know.
 
I just want to add what my fertility doctor told me. The 12 month rule of conceiving is true for those who are BDing at any time in their cycle and not tracking. He recommended that if you were timing your BDing with ovulation then you'd expect it to happen by 6 months and if it hasn't, your family doctor can run some basic tests. He also recommended that if you have a known infertility factor (history of endo, PCOS, known low sperm count) that 6 months on your own is enough. Same applies if your cycles are irregular (in my case, longer than 35 days and varies more than 5 days in length from cycle to cycle).

As hard as it is, having had a miscarriage is considered a good sign for your overall fertility. 95% of women who have a chemical pregnancy or a miscarriage will go on to conceive and have their rainbow baby. It means that at least one tube is open, one ovary has the ability to ovulate and there are at least a few good swimmers that can make it there. I know having a MC is hard and it doesn't feel reassuring for your overall fertility but those who've been trying for longer and have no history of a miscarriage seem to have the poorest outcome.

Good luck OP, I hope it happens for you and you get your sticky BFP really soon.
 
sarah - thank you for sharing! Of course MC is hard but that does give me hope that we can conceive again (we fell pregnant after basically one month of trying, one month of NTNP, and only loosely tracking my fertile window, based off my period dates). So I feel good that with more knowledge we can get pregnant again.
 
I'm sorry for your loss Alligator. I had a MC in July last year and it was incredibly difficult. We'd been trying for almost a year at that point. But as you can see I'm currently pregnant (but maybe for not much longer!). It can take a few cycles (if you have no issues) to get back to normal after a MC but some women are more fertile straight after. Good luck, I hope it happens for you really soon.
 
Thank you Sarah! Congrats on your pregnancy. My birthday is Aug 30... good day to be born ;) good luck!!
 
Haha happy birthday for the 30th! Any day now would be fantastic, he's just beginning to out stay his welcome :)
 

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