Ladies TTC #2, I have a question!

[charlie_lael]

How did you know for sure that you were ready for sure to try again?

I was so sure when we tried for our first, but now I have conflicting emotions... Not because I find parenting hard or anything, but I just don't know. It was all so clear when I wanted to have our first but now?

So I guess what I'm asking is; What was the tipping point for you? What made you say, "I really want to try for number two now"?

I still have time to think this over since Hubby is deployed again, haha. But I'd rather not be wrestling with this when he comes home. I don't want to torture the poor man.

 

[misscyn]

Im not sure what did it for me, i guess i always knew I wanted more than one child. However,if you are not sure, why dont you wait a while longer? Is there a reason you have to have another baby right now? How old is your child? Personally I dont understand why people rush to have their children back to back. Especially nowadays, with families of only 2 or 3 kids. Why not space them out and enjoy the whole parenthood thing longer?

 

[Curligurl]

I was just about to post a similar question! I have lupus so I have to work closely with my doctor to make sure my body is ready for pregnancy...well once I got the ok to TTC #2 I immediately started having doubts. I work full time and DH works nights so I'm the "main" caregiver . Whenever I have a stressful day at work I ask myself will I have the energy to take care of 2 kids by myself...I am very wishy washy with it right now too.

 

[misscyn]

Ok i just saw your signature. Your baby is just 1? My daughter was 2 when i started missing the feeling of having a little baby. She is now 3 and a half and we have just started to ttc number 2. I think you should give it another year at least. But of course this is just my humble opinion

 

[StranjeGirl]

We felt/feel exactly the same way. I think it's just scary going through the whole thing again..ttc, pregnancy, newborn, baby etc. It's a lot of work and I seriously wonder how I am going to do it without taking time away from dd. I know that having another child will change my relationship with her in the sense that she won't be the only one anymore and I will have to divide my attention. I'm going to be 39 next month so we can't wait much longer, which is why we have decided to try now. When we think about 10 years from now, we would really like more than one child, so we figure we can't think too much about the details and we just have to do it. Ugh, even typing this is making me have doubts again. I was just so depressed because af arrived, and now I'm thinking we're crazy for starting over with a newborn LOL!! It's a hard decision. Honestly though, I kinda wish we had done it earlier. The farther they are apart, the more you are really starting over in my opinion. GOod luck with your decision!

 

[twiggy56]

For us, we also wrestled over the idea of #2....but we always knew #2 was what we wanted but it was just *when*? We wanted to have a bigger house (that we owned) and also I wanted to be in a good place with my job and now those things have fallen into place...the next decider was when we preferred the babys due date to be- which was quite important to us because our daughter was born in February and she will be the very youngest in her year at school which has been a bit of a stressing point for me! So all those factors combined...plus she is nearly 4 and iv left enough time to enjoy her and now with school looming i feel i wont miss out on her...

All these things aligned, and made us feel ready I guess....!?

Oh and also it was seeing our daughter play alone, and felt like we wanted to give her someone to play with, or just be with through later life.

 

[charlie_lael]

We are not ttc currently. My husband is deployed and will be gone anywhere between six months to a year, so its obviously not an option. I was just curious about other peoples experiences and and how they came to the decision to have number two. Not that it matters right now, obviously, but I have just been wrestling with myself the past couple days about whether or not id like to try when hubby gets back. It was hard being pregnant and going through childbirth with DS cus daddy was deployed for that too. So another fear is that I'll have to do it alone all over again. Hubby just got back last December and left for another deployment before thanksgiving.

Anyway, like I said, it shouldn't really matter cus it's not possible right now this second, but I like to think everything through A LOT before I cone to a decision and I just wanted to get some advice.

 

[charlie_lael]

And to clarify, we know we want another baby eventually, but I'm wrestling with myself over WHEN. I'm just wondering when/how other ladies decided that the time was right.

 

[youngmommy26]

when I got pregnant with my first 7 years ago, I told myself I was never going to have another one. Now my son is 6, and about 2 1/2 years ago I started thinking about my son having a brother or sister and how awesome it would be, so me and DH started TTC#2. At first I was worried about the age gap, I didn't want them to be no more than 6 years apart, as me and my brother are 8 years apart and always hated each other growing up, we still aren't close. But now that we have been TTC for 2 years, and my boy is 6, the age gap is pretty much unavoidable at this point. I will just be happy to be pregnant. But I do get scared a little bit. When I was pregnant with my son, I was 21 years old and didn't know much about what was going on with my body really, I bought books and everything, but never really read them. I went to my last prenatal appointment like a week before he was born, the Dr. told me everything was fine, and that labor would be coming soon. So on the evening of October 23rd 2007 after I had taken DH to work, my water broke in the bathroom, so I figured I had a while so I got in the car and drove to pick him up from work and go to the Hospital. We got to the Hospital and apparently I had been in labor for 2 days at home and didn't even know it. I was 10 centimeters dialated when I walked into the hospital. so they rushed me upstairs, hooked me up to the monitors all that, and I was ready to push. Then they realized my son's foot was hanging out of me, My son had completely turned himself around in 1 week to the footling breech position, so I had to be rushed into emeregency C-section. I wasn't even awake for his birth. there was no time to numb me at all. I don't even remember the first time I held him because I was coming out of sedation. now my son is 6 years old with sever autism, everyday is a struggle, but we get through it. I wonder all the time if I am making the right decision by trying for another one. But i just have this feeling that having another baby would be good for my son, He always smiles really big and says "BABY" everytime he sees a baby in public, I just really think having sibling to look up to would really help him start talking more, and really flourish ya know? He is doing really well in special needs kindergarten around all the other kids, but he is very lonely at home and just sits in a corner and plays by himself. I just know in my heart it will be good. I just get so scared thinking about what our family went through the last time I gave birth

 

[charlie_lael]

Thank you for sharing. That is an amazing story and I wish you all the luck in TTC this new baby.

 

[pebbles10]

I have always wanted 2 children.
Being a mum is the best thing ever.
Never wanted a big age gap but my dd is nearly 4 and I have pcos and ttc for over a year. So body is saying different.

My little g keeps asking for a baby to play with.
She keeps saying mummy please and evens asks daddy.
Breaks my heart as its not happening.

You will know when the times right. Xxx

 

[charlie_lael]

Awww. I'm praying you get your bfp really soon.

 

[AliBiz]

I always knew I wanted more than one child and since I'm against the clock, that was the tipping point for me....LO is 16 months so even if I get pregnant next month she will be over 2 and I won't yet have hit 40. DH on the other hand thinks we have all the time in the world, thats the battle I am fighting at the moment

 

[Leliana]

I totally know what you mean, I have been having similar fears. It was always the plan for us to have our first two close together. We were all set to start in January as my first LO has been a very easy child. Or was until she hit 10 months and had a host of sleep problems! I do often worry about how I'm going to cope with two as at times I struggle with one! However, for us, I think the benefit of having two close together will outweigh the difficult times and they won't last forever. My body is so ready, my family is ready - it's just my mind that wavers! We've decided to NTNP for the time being, what will be will be