Ladies who have given birth before>> What advice would you give for first timers?

[lilly100]

this is my 3rd time and i would really recommend ante natal classes especially ones that cover breathing excersises as these really help, breathing got me to 7cm the last time with no other pain relief and i am going to go to these classes again this time around to refresh.
The only other thing i would say is be prepared for afterwards, everyone seems to concentrate on the actual labour and birth but no one mentions afterwards - i found it hard to go to the toilet - pouring a cup of water at the same time as you wee relieves stinging, and also, the fear of going for 'the other' is quite normal lol
dont expect to go home in normal clothes - you will prob still need maternity clothes.
I personally felt like everything was going to drop out of me (from down below) when i walked down the corridor of the hospital - again normal and the best thing to stop feeling like that is pelvic floor exercises.
Listen to your midwife and be prepared for things to go differently to how you want/expect them to

This is really great advice!.. Also not everyone is prepared for the amount of bleeding afterwards so dark baggy trousers and BIG pants are the way forward.. I used to use the pouring water when you go for a wee afterwards aswell and it really does help lol xx

yes the bleeding, its certainly more than a period so def dark trousers.
I think they should include things like that in antenatal classes as it sure came as a shock to me and would have appreciated someone telling me

 

[babyhopesxx]

this is my 3rd time and i would really recommend ante natal classes especially ones that cover breathing excersises as these really help, breathing got me to 7cm the last time with no other pain relief and i am going to go to these classes again this time around to refresh.
The only other thing i would say is be prepared for afterwards, everyone seems to concentrate on the actual labour and birth but no one mentions afterwards - i found it hard to go to the toilet - pouring a cup of water at the same time as you wee relieves stinging, and also, the fear of going for 'the other' is quite normal lol
dont expect to go home in normal clothes - you will prob still need maternity clothes.
I personally felt like everything was going to drop out of me (from down below) when i walked down the corridor of the hospital - again normal and the best thing to stop feeling like that is pelvic floor exercises.
Listen to your midwife and be prepared for things to go differently to how you want/expect them to

This is really great advice!.. Also not everyone is prepared for the amount of bleeding afterwards so dark baggy trousers and BIG pants are the way forward.. I used to use the pouring water when you go for a wee afterwards aswell and it really does help lol xx

yes the bleeding, its certainly more than a period so def dark trousers.
I think they should include things like that in antenatal classes as it sure came as a shock to me and would have appreciated someone telling me

Agreed, i knew i would get a period lasing for 4-6 weeks but didn't realise exactly how much i would bleed. My MW said going for a wee regularly helps reduce the amount of blood loss (i didn't go to the loo for a while coz i was too scared, never mind the thought of going for a poo. It's rather scary as you think everything will fall out)

 

[amerikiwi]

I'd def. recommend taking a good antenatal class with your birthing partner, but when it comes down to it, trust your body and your baby--they're the two running the show and fortunately they naturally know what they're doing!

Until the pushing stage, I focussed on my breathing and really felt like I was just along for the ride. Each contraction I thought about how that was one step closer to meeting my baby.

Also, remember that stress and panic will only slow things down and make it more painful. Go with the flow--if you go in with set expectations, you can set yourself up for disappointment if things don't go according to plan.

 

[ScarletGirl]

Have an open mind!! I went in trying for a natural delivery without medication and kept an open mind and went for the epidural. It made the pain go away and helped me to relax and enjoy the whole birthing processes.

If you are having a vaginal birth, there will be alot of bleeding, more then your worse period. I came prepared with heavy duty sanitary napkins because I did not want to be stuck wearing what the hospital gave me which made me feel like I was wearing a diaper. Also big underwear a.ka. Granny panties to hold the nice bulky sanitary napkin which could be quite long. Avoid bananas and anything constipating because trust me you won't want to push it out. Dark and relaxing pajamas and dark slippers because you may end up bleeding on them when going to the bathroom.

Also if you are going to breastfeed dry, chapped nipples are common and a lanolin cream made for breastfeeding helps a ton.

 

[Mama627]

Educate yourself on the different stages of birth and pain control options, but don't make a birth plan. Odds are that things won't go exactly like you want them to and that can make you feel like a failure.

Also, try to just go with the flow. You can't decide to stop giving birth, and fighting it only drags it out longer.

 

[CamoQueen]

The main thing I would stress is that when the pain gets really bad, remember: it has a purpose and it WILL end. Every contraction brings you closer to meeting your LO -- it can be easy to forget this when you're in really active labor, lol. And if you need pain relief by all means, ask for it!

 

[catfromaus]

Sleep leading up to the due date! I had a 40 hour labour, and hadn't slept for more than 4 hours the night before- so my best advice is to get plenty of sleep before hand!

 

[Clover Jane]

Heya everyone!

Right I'm feeling slightly guilty for the "honestly how does giving birth feel" thread!

Sooo.. I decided to do a post on birth BUT in a nicer way! Just to help put first timers at ease and to give them advice on how to cope with labour rather than how nasty it feels and how scary it all is because at the end of the day everyone is different and I think if people had of just given me some good honest advice before hand then I would of known what to expect kind of and the advice would of been really helpful too! xx

Keep an open mind.
I didn't find childbirth that painful... at all. Either time.
I'd heard all the horror stories, and went in expecting to want whatever kind of painkillers they could give me.
But I didn't end up needing any, because labor didn't really hurt that bad.
There was never any point where it seemed worth getting a needle in the spine.

For some people, labor and delivery are obviously a lot worse than they are for others.
Different people have different tolerances for pain, perhaps. Different people have different sorts of bodies. Some people can undergo labor without any severe pain. I'm one of them. For others, it's a nightmare, apparently.

I'm just saying, keep an open mind.
You really don't know how it will be for you until you get there.

 

[lucy_lu10]

1.) Don't jump for an induction! I didn't get one (thankfully!!) but I was naive and let my doctor schedule one for me anyway. My body went into labour on its own, the way it's meant to. Sure there are instances where induction is necessary (high blood pressure, 42+ weeks pregnant, medical emergency, etc) but for the most part, it just causes a more painful and intense labour. Especially if you're planning on going drug-free, induction makes that less likely to happen.

2.) Trust your body! We're made to do this and if you remain confident in your body and yourself, you'll be better able to relax and work through the labour/delivery.

 

[Alimum]

People say birth plans are usless because it all goes out the window.
It is true in a sense, but the process of researching, reading, questioning, allows you to develop your own opinions ie. on position, drugs, pain relief.
It's better than relaying on a 3rd party (the mid wifez) to decide.

This will be my forth birth, but only the 2 child I take home.
The first birth where sad for me, for a long time.
But I totally believe in drug free and the feeling I had after giving birth, even though I didn't even get to hold those babies, was amazing.
For me, the power of the hormones over powered anything else. It was great!

So I recommded Hypobirthing (even though the first 2 I just grunted and seated my way through blindly!).

 

[Xuxa]

you had this advice before but here it goes...Keep an open mind!that's the main thing for me... Plans do go out the window sometimes and you can't be feeling guilty if your plan does change.
Also remember that you are a Woman that has brought a child into the world and no matter how that happened you've done an AMAZING job!!
First time i had a waterbirth, no painkillers and boy did i want them at a stage...lol This time i might ask for the epi, it's available so why not? Also this time i told my midwife and doctor that if i need a ceasar they must be honest with me and i'm not against it like i was with my DD.
Don't go there thinking about what society expects of you. Take it as far as you can or want to go. When the pain is too much, if it is ever too much, ask for drugs. If you manage fine all the way to the end, great!! if you need a C-section, go for it and never feel bad. Cause no matter what you have created a human from scratch and whichever way your baby comes out, that day is about meeting your child!
Good luck!!!and i'm sure that if you listen to your body and instincts everything will be just fine

 

[eviestar]

breathe, dont panic and trust your instincts
xx

 

[lynnikins]

relax, trust your body and breathe

yes it will hurt we all know that so deal with it and put it aside the pain wont kill you and it all serves a purpose in the end

 

[jimjam112]

Dis is a great thread!

 

[jenny82]

Yoga, birthing ball, relaxation and a pineapple.

Seriously though, I can't go on about yoga and breathing enough. Am about to sign up to classes again as I couldn't have gotten through labour without the tips I got from that class. I somehow got to 8cm at home before we went to the hospital and I really hope it goes like that again this time!

 

[lilly100]

Yoga, birthing ball, relaxation and a pineapple.

Seriously though, I can't go on about yoga and breathing enough. Am about to sign up to classes again as I couldn't have gotten through labour without the tips I got from that class. I somehow got to 8cm at home before we went to the hospital and I really hope it goes like that again this time!

i agree so much, breathing gives you something to focus on with each contraction

 

[Blah11]

- its not a given that its going to be agony and you're going to never want to do it again. I enjoyed my birth immensly.

- when MW says dont push, listen to her to stop the chances of you tearing.

- post birth you bleed A LOT. No one ever told me you'd bleed clots for a week and how heavy it is

- take paracetemol and ibuprofen after youve had your LO. Your hormones stave the pain off for a bit but when it hits you your foof is very sore LOL dont let it get sore.