Lesbian couples experience before and after child birth

Blackmoon

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So my partner and I are wondering what other lesbian couples experienced during pregnancy and after the child was born.

1. Did the baby recognize your partners voice after he/she were born?
2. Did the baby respond to your partner if she talked or sung to your belly while you were pregnant?
3. What does the child call each of you?

Anything really helps we just would like to know what other couples have experienced having a child together. Thank you bunches.


:help:
 
I don't have any personal experience, I just didn't want to lurk and leave. :) Good luck with your LO and to your little family!

If I had to guess for #1s one and 2 - I think your baby will recognize whoevers voice he or she hears the most while in the womb. Obviously the mom carrying the baby, but also your OH since her voice will be around a lot too. I don't think that the bonding between my hubby and my LO are because of genetics. I think it's because she has recognized that his voice is always around and he's always talking to her.

As for what to call you both, I'd think you could do "Mom" and "Mama" or something like that. :)
 
I totally think the bond comes from the start of the pregnancy to birth. When I was pregnant with DD1 I was single living with my mother she was constantly talking and touching my belly and I think because I had an emotional connection with mum on a daily basis my DD felt that. My mother was there when she was born and as soon as mum spoke my DD looked for her and once she seen her just stared for a good 10 minutes. And now the bond between them is amazing. You would think my mum was her mother. Now with DD2 I was living on my own with my ex and didn't see much of my mum and there isn't really a connection at all.

As in what your DS will call you you would have to talk to you DW about it and see what see would like to be called.

GL with it all Hun x
 
I'm sure he will know her voice the baby won't care what gender either is all he knows is love and I'd say for names. Mom and find something close but different for your so each has a name congrats on your pregnancy!
 
just thought i might be able to help a tad...

im not in a lesbian relationship but i know a fair bit about bonding.....

im adopted (when i was 8 weeks old) and my parents are the best in the world...

my mother and I have a bond most biological mother-daughters would only dream of and we are so so so close.... my whole life no one has ever asked if i was adopted because of how close me and my mum are... we are so similar and shes my best friend.
I also have an amazing dad and we have a fantastic realtionship too...

I never met my (adoptive)parents til i was 8 weeks old and i only recently found out (whilst meeting her for the first time) my birth mother sang and talked and spent a lot of time doing those things whilst i was in the womb...

i had no connection to her at all when i met her...

like 0... like u have no idea how far from being close we were... not for any reason just i felt nothing... she and i were almost from different plannets.. nice lady... but i just had no connection not even a tiny bit...

i just wanted to say this coz from my experience biology and genetics make up very very little of what qualifies people as "parents"... its the next 40 years that makes it ...

dh talks to my tummy all the time and i firmly believe that it starts from the very begining and bubs knows who his daddy is ... but unless u keep it going forever it doesnt mean a thing...its about having two loving and caring parents who are there for bubs no matter what happens in their lives

thats just my 2 cents....

goodluck :)
x
 
I agree with the pp's. I don't have personal experience, but there is a same sex parenting section where you can probably get more answers from people with experience :) I'm sure your baby boy will know both your voices since they're the ones he hears most often.
 
Hi. Thought i would reply to you.
We are a lesbian couple and ready to have our baby at anytime now.
My wife has had a close connection with baby/bump since we got pregnant,she rubs bio oil on my tummy every day and every night and has done since 8weeks pregnant,she has always talked to him by lying on my bump,the further along we have got the more baby recognises her. If she talks to my bump now i can guarantee he will kick her,yet if others do it he rarely puts on a show lol. When my partner is around baby is much more active in Here,he definitely recognises her.
As for names he will be calling my wife 'mommy' and will be calling me 'mom mom' this works for me and my wife as she has always referred to me as mom mom. Its just whatever worksfor you.
Anything else i can help you with then give me a shout. Good luck xxx
 
As a lesbian couple we r struggling with this also, expecting him to come anyday now. Tho I believe as long as love is involved our Lil boy will bond no matter what! Good luck to all of u! Not sure what we will like to be called but we will let him decide, but for now mom, ma, mommy. Whatever floats his boat...
 
My best friend was raised by a lesbian couple. She called her bio mom "mom" and her other mom "nonny" and that's what worked for them. She seemed to be equally connected to each of her moms.

Baby will bond with whoever loves it and snuggles it and feeds it and cares for it, try not to worry yourself too much over that!

(Fun side story: my mom's a doula and had clients where the dad did throat singing. He throat sang after baby was born, and baby's head WHIPPED around to where the sound was coming from - so they'll definitely tune in to familiar sounds.)
 

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