Little rant.

[Cashewnut]

I'm a bit bummed out this morning, but dont want to talk to the OH about it because I dont want to cause drama.

When we found out we were expecting, OH was so excited he called his mum straight away, nice, but news spread on their side very fast, and within 5 minutes we had a phone call from his sister, Offering us all of her baby stuff (literally everything we would need), as her 2 kids were now too old to be using a crib and they were just going to chuck it out. Needless to say I was over the moon, I dont earn all that much, and I am the only one who works atm, so it was literally a life saver.

Yesterday we got a call from my MIL, saying that my SIL had changed her mind, and come to pick up all of the baby stuff, because they had just found out her husbands sister was pregnant. Now I was sat on the phone for a good 5 minutes, trying to pretend like it was no big deal, when I excuse myself and give the phone to my OH. They chat for a while, and OH says He wasnt expecting her to come through anyway. Fair enough as he knows his sister much better than me.

But I was just so upset, you dont go and promise some one all of ths stuff, and literally give it to them ( we were storing it at MIL as no room here atm), and then just take it all back. I didnt say anything to OH, as I know he would just say "I told you not to get your hopes up" but im pretty sure you dont just take a gift like that back?

Sorry its long, and probably confusing, but now I need to literally split my wages in half to be able to afford any baby stuff.

Stupid hormones >.<

 

[Maybe1stBaby]

Outrageous behavior. I would speak to your sister-in-law directly about her actions, and how callous it is that she couldn't ask for the stuff back herself.

I'm sure she knows her behavior was disrespectful and immature, but someone needs to stand up to her! Tell her you're very grateful for the gift you've already received, very happy her husband's sister is also pregnant, but it's really bad social etiquette to ask for gifts you've already given back!

And to make a point, I'd ask for any gifts you have given her for Christmas--just say, oh we're a bit tight for money, OH doesn't work currently, can you give back your Christmas gift, so I can sell it?

I can't believe your SIL or your MIL frankly. Don't blame your hormones for being upset. These people have some nerve!

 

[nickyXjayno]

Sorry that's just weird.
She could have asked if you didn't mind much if she could give some stuff out of all of it to the other woman, but not all!

I think I'm much more of a rude person as I would phone up the woman and ask her what the deal is.

 

[k8y]

thats really mean of her. Especially as she must know the situation that you guys are in . Have you every tried freecycle. I use it alot. Its a website where you can ask people for things that they dont need anymore and you can get rid of stuff you dont need anymore. So you could put a wanted advert up for baby stuff then you can tell her to shove it. Also if you are in the uk and on a low income your are entitled to various grants from the government. there is a sure start one for 500 pounds just to help you buy stuff for your new baby. hope you can getthings sorted. Also I got most of my baby stuff from car boots for a fraction of the cost of what they are new. baby clothes tend to be like 20p an item, i bought our moses basket for 8 pounds with a stand, and its nearly new, her little boy was too big for it really early on. oh and NTC and Sure start do various sales throughout the year and you can pick up some bargains there. The NCT have a list of dates on their website.

 

[nicnicjayne]

I agree, it is definitely not hormones! I would be so annoyed at her lack of basic manners. She obviously knows that she is in the wrong though or surely she would have called you herself? She could have easily just split the stuff between the two of you like any normal, decent person would.

If I were you, I'd call her and let her know that you are upset because otherwise the resentment could linger for years. However, there is no way I'd accept her stuff now!

Hope you good some sort of apology from her!

 

[babyhopes2010]

Id be annoyed too its like saying ur baby deserves less then the other.Try not to let itget too you shes obviously a thoughtless person

 

[plutosblue]

I agree, it is definitely not hormones! I would be so annoyed at her lack of basic manners. She obviously knows that she is in the wrong though or surely she would have called you herself? She could have easily just split the stuff between the two of you like any normal, decent person would.

If I were you, I'd call her and let her know that you are upset because otherwise the resentment could linger for years. However, there is no way I'd accept her stuff now!

Hope you good some sort of apology from her!

I would do exactly the same, she probably doesn't realise how much trouble she has caused you but knows shes in the wrong (I have a self centred SIL just like that who is just a bit not all there)

I know it sounds harsh - but if you don't let it out you will boil over! I know I would.