I wish I had some good advice but I don't -- I can only say I have had similar feelings to this over the years . . . but also that I believe there can be a light at the end of the tunnel.
My DH and I got together right after I turned 20 and he was just turned 25. I was in the middle of getting my bachelor's degree and he was working (he graduated at 22 after getting a 4 year degree). We were long-distance for a few months and moved in together after about 5 months into our relationship. Those first couple of years were really rocky (in all honesty, I still had a lot of growing up to do . . . I can say that now, but I didn't see it then). But ever since we were first together, I always had a of of jealousy issues when it came to babies and would get upset that having a baby seemed always to be so far away. I guess I've just always wanted one. I knew of course that we weren't ready for one for a long time (money, not living in a place where we wanted to settle down, etc) . . . but I would still get very upset with DH that he never seemed to really
want a child like I did. When we were first together, he understood from the beginning that child(ren) were part of "the deal" when it came to being with me in the long term, so he never said we wouldn't have them, or that he didn't want them, but would never talk about them in any sense other than the abstract.
Fast-forward to ~4 years ago. We've moved to a new place and I'm 25. I've started working on my career for a couple of years, but I am starting to get antsy. When I bring up the idea of having a baby, not in the sense that 'we should do it now' but 'let's make a plan', I would get a lot of very non-committal answers and the general statement of, "we're just not ready yet". We had a few pretty big fights over the last few years about this, but usually they would end up with me in tears because I felt like DH would never think we are "ready" . . . and him trying to comfort me explaining that he didn't know what reason I had to think that. Sometimes men don't understand
](/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/eusa_wall.gif "Brick wall ](*,)")
But last year (when I am 28), we are living in a home we own (with room for baby), are doing well financially, etc. I start talking more seriously about it to him (but also carefully) about things related to parenthood. I also talk to my doctor, do my own research, and instead of talking about "when we will start TTC", I start talking about things related to what kind of parent I wanted to be, what kind of life I wanted to have for my kids, what kind of things I thought we should do or not do as parents. Surprisingly (or not, if I had just trusted him), he was open to these conversations (he doesn't ever talk much about things, but he didn't shut these conversations out).
Fast-forward again to this year (February), I am a couple months into being 29 and DH knows I have a lot of concerns about being able to get pregnant, because I have always struggled with my weight, which we all know can affect fertility, and because my periods were super irregular when I was younger before going on the pill. He also knows I don't want to be well into my thirties when I first start TTC (I have casually, but clearly, made all these points clear to him over the years). So in Feb of this year I go to the doctor for a regular smear and talk a bit about my history and the steps for TTC. The doctor explains that my heart and blood pressure and whatnot are all good, but of course I should lose weight (which I have struggled with for many years) . . . but also explains there are risks in waiting until well into my 30's before trying, especially if I will have fertility problems. So she explains what she thinks should be the steps to proceed (i.e, go off pill, use condoms, track ovulation and see if I settle into a cycle before TTC, so we at least know what we are dealing with). Much to my surprise, I talked about this to DH that evening and he wasn't shocked or scared
A couple weeks later and it is time to start a new birth control pack and I ask him does he think we should go off the pills and start down, "the path". After thinking for a few minutes he says, "We can if you want."
Of course being pragmatic, he wants to have a quick discussion about things like, what will we do if we get pregnant accidentally early, etc, but he was totally on-board.
Right now we are working on bringing some builders in to remove our kitchen, replace the floor, and re-install the kitchen, which is going to cost about $14.000 (builders are expensive in Denmark
) . . . which it will be nice to have this done before TTC. But just today DH referred to TTC as "the next project" after we are done with the kitchen
so I know he is on board, after all those years of saying, "We're not ready!" and also refusing to give me a date (he always argued that dates are stupid because there is no way to know if we will be "ready" by then). Instead he asked me to trust him that he was going to hold up his end of the deal all those years.
As I said before, I really don't have any good advice . . . but maybe you can get some new perspective from my experience.
I wish I could help more
Nooooo I didn't take your comments negatively, its so hard to get my thoughts and tone across online 
I appreciated your point, as I can see how it could come across that he just doesn't want children and will me string me on until the cows come home. Or, even worse, do it just for me when he doesn't really want to. But I know that he does, I'm just soooo fed up of waiting, it's frustrating and upsetting. I'm so sorry that your situation ended the way it did, it must have been very difficult for you at the time. I really hope my OH is genuine in his decision that it's the right time, when he finally gets there, and as much as I believe that he will get there and it will work out eventually non of us know what the future holds. I wish I did have it all figured out, it wouldn't feel so heart breaking to wait if I had a definite end date where we magically get pregnant without any problems and it all works out 
