Lost all hope :(

Discussion in 'Miscarriage Support' started by Stacey_89, Dec 9, 2009.

  1. Stacey_89

    Stacey_89 Team PINK

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    Hey ladies hope everyone is well.

    Today I am feeling very low and crying every 5mins,it would of been my angels due date in 4days and it's killing me :(

    it's been six months since the loss and I'm losing hope. Just wondering if anyone can tell me some stories to bring my hopes back up. My cycles have not returned normal yet either they go up to 45days and me and oh bd every other day for the past 6months and nothing:( starting to feel like it's going to take forever. I crnt imagin it being another six months it would wreck me.

    So if anyone here concieved after six months I would be very grateful to hear from you so I know I'm not the only one going mad and thinking there must be something wrong with me

    thankyou x
     
  2. emalou90

    emalou90 Well-Known Member

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    im sorry for your loss hun :( must be very hard for you and your oh. sending hugs :hugs: xxxx
     
  3. emma77

    emma77 Well-Known Member

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    It took me 6 months and although I had mainly 32 days cycles, the one where I conceived was really long and I was unsure of when ovulation occurred. So, it may well happen when you have given up all hope :hugs:
    At least you know you can get pregnant as you did before. The time I conceived I was having a fitness and health month, really taking care of myself. Best of luck :flower:

    xx
     
  4. velvetina

    velvetina Mum of 3

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    Oh my lovely, I am so sorry (hugs). I wish there words to take those feelings away, it is very unfair sometimes. The only thing I can share with you is a tip my private ob/gyn advised when I went to see him after not conceiving. He told me to have sex every other day from about day 10 to day 19 (I had a 31-34 day cycle). This worked for me and took a lot of the pressure off ttc daily. Have you thought about going to see your dr to discuss things and share your feelings, you have a lot going on at the moment and it may help.

    Wishing you all the best hun. x x
     
  5. suzib76

    suzib76 Well-Known Member

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    awww hun didnt want to read and run, but i can only offer (((((HUGS)))))
     
  6. hudz26

    hudz26 Mum to 3

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    awwww hunni so sorry for your loss r.i.p lil angel, like others i have no advice but offer you big :hugs: xxxxxxx take care hun and i really hope it happens for you very soon xxxxxxxxxxx
     
  7. Parkep

    Parkep Very happy mom

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    hey hun i lost my sea monkey, in march and i didn't conceive again till October. Thats about 8 months. With my sea monkey it took one cycle i for sure thought i would never be pregnant again. But hun keep your chin up it will happen :hugs: PM me if you need to talk.
     
  8. KermitO

    KermitO Well-Known Member

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    :hugs: I will give you a brief outline of my baby journey and hope it helps or gives some hope.

    I came off the pill expecting to get pg straight away, my cycles were all over the place and eventually I was referred for help. Initially I was diagnosed with underactive tyroid and once treated it solved the irregular cycles but still nothing. Eventually got told it was unexplained, only to move house and hospitals where they were much more thorough and did more tests/scans and said it was definately PCOS. Eventually got pg but mc at 10 weeks which was awful, depressing, heartbreaking - as you know.

    After several more years and procedures we were told that we may need to consider living child free - which we decided was the best option, I was so stressed and depressed. I chose to do a uni course 500 miles from where we lived and we moved lock, stock and barrel so I could do it.

    At the beginning of 2nd year my af was late so I went to dr to get thyroid checked, the usual cause, when I was told I was pregnant. My son is now 17 months old and I am 27 weeks pregnant with my second, again a complete shock. :shock:

    Personally I think NOT thinking about it all the time helped, hard though that decision was to make.

    It is always worth a chat to your doctor, ask about thyroid as it can affect your moods, cycles and fertility. Maybe try and give yourself a month off, really hard I know but try setting yourself something else to think about for that month - in the long run it's only a month.

    It was 5 years between my mc and pg, different I know because I was in treatment but it took 18 months from not thinking about it to being pg.

    My mc was on 15th Dec so is in my mind at this time of year and remember how hard it was, don't give up hope, but try to relax and think it will happen when you are ready. You have been pregnant before and hard though mc are many many people go on to have succesful pg after. Give it some time :hugs:

    Love
    Kx
     
  9. Cattia

    Cattia Well-Known Member

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    Sorr this is such a rough time for you :(
    I know this might sound a bit weird but have you tired anything like acupuncture? A friend of mine got pregnant on IVF and then lost her baby quite early on, then she found an acupunctirist and got pregnant again naturally within two months. I know this might sound like one of those stories that is just coincidence, but it might be worth giving it a go and might help you to feel more in control, would almost certainly help regulate your cycles again as well?
     
  10. Stacey_89

    Stacey_89 Team PINK

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    Thankyou everyone for kind replys, I do feel alot better :)
    I went to the doctors a few weeks ago about it and they said to wait for one more period and if it comes late again then they shall put me on something to help.

    Me and oh have stopped smoking,and eating more healthy,also bought pregnacare conception for me and wellman conception for oh. I hope I have a 2010 bump :)
     
  11. twiggy56

    twiggy56 Mummy expecting #2

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    I had very long irregular cycles too...but wanted to offer a bit of hope. I had no AF for months...cd80 came along and still nothing, i was giving up hope for this cycle (and any future ones if this was what i was going to be dealing with) However on cd83 i found it in myself to do a random opk...completely out of the blue and it was positive. I held out no hope it was 'real' as ov on cd83 seemed a bit far-fetched. So we only bd'd twice once that day and once the day after...not thinking we had a chance.

    ...come cd93 at (what i know now must have been 10dpo) i began to feel different. Took a pg test and low and behold...here we are.

    Dont give up hope hun, even when you feel so defeated by your body and feeling completely helpless. Im so sorry for the loss of your little angel, i cant imagine how hard it must be, especially now. I offer you my warmest thoughts and big hugs hun :hugs: xx
     
  12. mrsw777

    mrsw777 Third Trimester

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    Hello, sorry to hear of your loss & your frustration with ttc. Hopefully my story will help put your mind at ease somewhat.

    We decided to start ttc in feb 2008 & were lucky enough to fall on our 2nd month. Unfortunately our happiness was short lived when our son was born sleeping at 22 weeks. After waiting for my next AF, it was all I could focus on was to get pg again. Months went by, we tried everything opks, brazil nuts, smep, sex every day, every other day, legs in the air etc etc. After 6 months I felt I needed to take control so started acupuncture & i had a lovely lady - it almost turned into a therapy session. Anyhow my cycles became more regular & GP blood tests after cycle 9 confirmed I was ovulating so just had to wait...That month we went on holiday & forgot about ttc, just ate, drank, laughed & had lots of fun sex ( sorry if tmi!) and guess what we brought home - our longed for BFP!!

    It will happen, I know it's easier said than done but try to relax & before you know, it will be your turn.

    Good luck xxx
     
  13. mrsw777

    mrsw777 Third Trimester

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    Sorry meant to say, my cycles were all over the place between 27-45 days, had thyroid checked etc but all normal, think it was just my body's way of saying I wasn't ready. After a couple of months of weekly acupuncture ( I'd also tried agnus castus & evening primrose but they didn't work) my cycles were 28-32 days.

    xxx
     
  14. Luna

    Luna Mum of two

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    It took us 7 months to concieve. Not uncommon. I'm sorry for your loss - many hugs and all the baby dust in the world xx
     
  15. sophster

    sophster Guest

    There was a lady on another forum I was on who didn't have AF for three years; had tried fertility treatments and no cigar; then she suddenly started feeling funny and discovered she was three months pregnant. Something similar happened to the singer Jill Scott as well she didn't have a period in many years, and was even recommended to have a hysterectomy because of the small but real risk of womb cancer if you don't have periods for prolonged periods of time; anyway a year or so back she had a healthy baby. These are real extreme cases but in the more normal but long cycle range; I know many people who have around 50 day cycles and not even regular and yet they have several kids; it may have taken quite some time to conceive the first one but after that there was no stopping them. With the baby that I lost recently my cycle was around 70 days long prior to that, the annoying thing is I don't have any tangiable hormonal problem such as PCOS; or a thyroid issue; its unexplained and I want to do acupuncture but can't afford it right now (we recently moved so are flat out broke). With my boys though my cycles were similar to yours now and I always got pregnant when I least expected it. I do think stress is a massive factor so try to avoid stress and maybe learn some relaxation techniques.

    Sophie
     
  16. Stacey_89

    Stacey_89 Team PINK

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    Thankyou everyone your stories really have helped me and I feel more hopeful again. I guess sometimes I just have really bad days where I just think it won't happen and I get myself into a terrible mood about it. I'm positive that I will have a 2010 bump :) I just hope I won't have to much longer for that bfp again. In the mean time I will just enjoy Christmas with my family have a great new year and relax more,plus I have a job interview Friday so if I get my new job that will keep my mind occupied :)
     
  17. DueMarch2nd

    DueMarch2nd mummy to a little lamb

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    Well I went off the pill end of March 2008. We werent ttc very hard, just did the whatever happens happens thing and I found out on new years eve 08 I was 5-6 weeks pregnant. I sadly lost that baby on February 15 due to a mmc (baby stopped growing at 8 weeks but the little bud decided to stay in mummys tummy for 3 more weeks before i said goodbye) It was awful. There were a few reasons we waited and then in June (right around my birthday on the 10th) we decided not to use a condom anymore at that time of the month and do the whatever happens happens thing again. And 2 weeks later, on June 26 I got another bfp and the little guy is still with me.

    6 months isnt long hun. I know it feels like eternity because of the loss. My sister has been ttc for so long. I think like 2 years. It is a long journey sometimes. But as some others have said, the bright side is that you know you can get pregnant. Also it has been mentioned that excersize and healthy living helps. I cant say that is true from experience but I have heard so often that it is true. Eat right, dont smoke or drink etc. I mean both of you, OH as well.

    Very best of Luck hun :hugs:
     

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