Might as well get started

[Mrs. MB]

Holli - sorry they treated you that way! I think you're better off at a high risk clinic. They'll take better care of you.

 

[Holliems]

Thanks y'all. I don't believe what I was told is true. I could see if I had done them over and over but I didn't. And there were no complications. I'm not so worried as I just feel judged. And because of that they put worry on me and given me false information based on religious beliefs.

 

[Mrs. MB]

Holli - it's not right for them to judge you. We all make decisions and they are not always easy. I'm sorry they treated you that way.

 

[medic76097]

They said it's because I had a mmc (over 10 years ago) and because I had an abortion a few years ago. (Very early on and because of a lot of reasons. X-rays meds abusive partner not married. List goes on) Anyway this clinic is a Catholic OB clinic. Jesus is everywhere. I don't know if what they said is true or they just wanted me out of the clinic? They referred me to a different clinic. Is what they told me true? They said because of it my body is at higher risk of miscarriage. I find it hard to believe honestly.

There is a little bit of a medical reason for a possible high risk referral but I would assume that they are pushing you out the door because of the Catholic part of it. Every time you have a d&c for any reason, if it's a Mmc or a medical abortion, it has the potential to create scar tissue and create possible complications later on. I had a cousin who by drug fueled bad choices had several abortions and got to the point where they told her if she had one more she would rupture her uterus so the only option she had was a hysterectomy. Anyway, don't worry too much or take it personally. Maybe the higher risk clinic is a better fit for you just based on the clinics harsh judgment. Plus, the upside to a high risk doc is that they have amazing experience if you ever do need it

 

[Holliems]

Thanks. I've never had a dnc. I've been able to pass everything naturally. But even if it's true...it's an OB clinic. Why wouldn't they just monitor me there?

I guess an upside to high risk is more scans!

 

[gigglebox]

Yup, sounds like religious prejudice to me...probably best you're going elsewhere then. But yes, high risk does mean lots of scans! I was labled high risk at 12 weeks. There on out i got a scan every 2-3 weeks. It was scary at first, not knowing if the next time i was in my baby might be gone, but he never stopped and after i could feel him move, it was very nice to still get to "see him" every few weeks i've never heard of abortions making you high risk...i've known many pregnant ladies, a couple with multiple abortions, one with a couple mc's under her belt, and i personally had a d&c (for a misdiagnosed polyp, but the procedure is the same as for an abortion, just no fetus to remove)....none of them were classed as high risk, i was for a concerned NT scan, nothing to do with my uterus.

And....how dare you take more tests and not post them! That's, like, against the POASA official rules!

 

[medic76097]

Oh yea. Then there's no medical reason for it. That sucks

 

[Holliems]

June sorry I didn't answer you question earlier. I'm not sure if I'm going to start a pregnancy journal. A part of me doesn't want to get attached to the idea of being pregnant incase it goes south.

 

[DobbyForever]

So glad to see you got your bfp! I think I disappeared before you got it. I'm so sorry they treated you that way. I agree that it is definitely a religious thing. It's sad, but it happens. The gyn who delivered me (I was born in a battered women's shelter) decided he thought my immigrant mother with an abusive partner who got married at 18 and was 28 at the time was a bad candidate for motherhood. He pressured her into tying her tubes, and then when he did it he totally destroyed her tubes beyond any repair. People think they are doing the world a favor by imposing their misguided beliefs on others. Well, too bad so sad for that doctor. My mom remarried after my dad passed (ftr he got counseling when I was born and turned into best husband/dad ever) to a richy rich lawyer who could afford ivf so suck it doctor I have two epic twin brothers.

 

[Holliems]

Yea it kind of made me sad in a way. People are so quick to judge others. I've never told anyone about it but my husband because it's a sensitive subject. I told them because I thought they needed to know because they asked about all pregnancies.

I sat there feeling like I needed to explain why I did it. I wanted to tell them how hard of a decision it was. I guess in the end I'm better going somewhere else.

I appreciate everyone being supportive here. I had no one else to tell.

 

[gigglebox]

Of course that is a personal decision and really no one's business. Rare is the woman who does it without a heavy weight on her shoulders. You did what you thought was best, and that makes you caring and responsible. F' a clinic that thinks any different!

 

[DobbyForever]

Biggest hugs. I know how s***ty that feels. I always cringe when I get asked (EVERY TIME like it's not in my file after all these years because I have had Kaiser my entire life): how many pregnancies have you had? How many children do you have? Most advice nurses just go on to scheduling my appointment, but every now and then I get the uncomfortable silence or someone asks if they were terminations. I feel obligated to answer for the sake of getting the best medical care, but it really sucks having to detail them all and feel like I have explain everything away.

You are definitely better off elsewhere. You want to be with people who you trust to guide you through this wonderful time/

 

[Holliems]

Yea F'em!

 

[mindyb85]

Holli, I don't think they were being prejudice. It's true that with any miscarriage (or abortion), it automatically puts you at a higher risk factor. They want what's best for you sweetie. A high risk place means more scans and blood work and keeping an extra close eye on you and baby! It's probably a blessing in disguise.

 

[emicakess]

I was put on high risk for having dysplasia on my cervix. Then the high risk doctor said the computer says im high risk, but im actually not. Ive also had a mmc.
Holli i i scrolled thriugh and saw words like "high risk " "d&c" i panicked and read through! Oh so glad everything is okay holli. I totally get feeling judged. I cant stand judgmental religious people (not all religious people, just the judgey ones). Your better off not there anyway if they are so quick to judge you. Hope all is well

 

[Holliems]

Mindy-Maybe not. You could be right. But it felt that way.

Thanks Emicakes. I'm actually glad they classed me as high risk. More scans!

 

[campn]

Congrats hun!!!

As for the high risk thing, I've always known that any pregnant woman from 35 years and up are automatically considered high risk, so don't take it personally! It doesn't mean your body is broken or anything like that, but just means more things can go wrong. I know a lady who had kids at 42, and 44, completely healthy!

 

[junemomma09]

June sorry I didn't answer you question earlier. I'm not sure if I'm going to start a pregnancy journal. A part of me doesn't want to get attached to the idea of being pregnant incase it goes south.

I understand that hun. If you do decide to make one be sure to let us know!

 

[Holliems]

Will do! ....Where do you go to post pregnancy journals?

 

[junemomma09]

Hmm maybe the pregnancy section they have journal section?