Mil rant re: nursery

[LoveCakes]

Urgh MiL is really starting to annoy me. I'm 23 weeks and she has been saying we need to get the nursery sorted since 18 weeks. The room needs the boxes put in the attic and painted otherwise it's fine. We've explained that were not planning to go to buy paint on the way back from the hospital, we plan to have it finished by 32 weeks. She said what if baby comes early. If baby comes more than 8 weeks early i won't give a damn what colour the walls are.

Apparently she can't sleep thinking the room isn't done and is worried the poor baby will breathe in pain fumes. They won't even be in there sleeping for 6 months! She brought it up 4 times on Sunday each time after the conversation had changed and cornered Oh when he called in earlier.


Phew, sorry needed to get that off my chest! I feel like she's questioning our parenting decisions and baby is still in my belly.

 

[loopy82]

Wow, that's crazy! I was demented about having everything ready before my dd arrived but even I wasn't that mental I did get everything ready in plenty of time, dd still hasn't moved into her own room though and she turned three at the weekend

 

[CastawayBride]

My son came at 32 weeks, this time we will have it done by the time I enter third tri....but honestly, the baby spends time in your room in the beginning so yea it doesn't matter if it does not bother you!

 

[wookie130]

Your response:

"Rollers and brushes are in the basement! How nice of you to volunteer!" LOL!

 

[superfrizbee]

I'd be now not doing it just to annoy her some more

 

[Bex84]

Gosh thats irritating. With my lo's room it stayed blue and she is a girl lol. She has fairy wall stickers and then some farm animal framed pictures on wall. She has a built in closset which i painted a jungle scene on for her. She wasent in there for long time. This lo we just moved cot in our room purely as lo had as cot bed but we got her to pick a single bed so rather than take out we have put strait in our room. There is a set of draws in our room for baby as well.. Some point we will empty what is now the office but wont be rushing lol

 

[NotNic]

We completed on our house at 34 weeks last time, ripped out the kitchen, boiler and had new lights and flooring. We painted all but two rooms in time for moving at 37+6wks and my son arrived at 39+0. His nursery furniture arrived two weeks after he was born. He is now almost two and hasn't been harmed one bit by not having his nursery ready in time Annoying as it is though, if that's all she's complaining about I'd just ignore her!

 

[Yo_Yo]

Guess she's not heard of fume free paint then?!

She needs to chillax!

 

[JoHio]

Your response:

"Rollers and brushes are in the basement! How nice of you to volunteer!" LOL!

Amen to that! Seriously, decorating the nursery should be a lovely experience. Don't let her ruin it for you. And by the way, if for it to be joyous it means you don't get around to it until AFTER the baby is here, so be it. I didn't do my son's or daughter's until after - I was too anxious and nervy while pregnant and had bigger fish to fry than the damned nursery. I had a wonderful time shopping for baby's decor WITH baby there.
Mine didn't even use their own rooms until just under a year old anyway...
All this said, I know many women who love doing it while waiting for baby to arrive. Whatever works for you - just (as I said) try not to let her ruin it.

But as wookie130 said, if she wants to help, point her to a paint brush and tell her to start lifting those boxes!

 

[kazine]

Apparently she can't sleep thinking the room isn't done and is worried the poor baby will breathe in pain fumes.

Sounds like my OH's mum hahahahahahahahaha.

 

[LoveCakes]

Thanks ladies, I've calmed down (a bit) today. It is tempting to do it at our own pace then casually mention at 38 weeks 'oh I must get those paint rollers out of the shed'!

We were ltttc and went through fertility treatment then I had a month of bleeding in first tri so we're being hopeful but a bit cautious.

She also said were being ungrateful by not picking a cot as she offered to but us it (which we are grateful for) because she didn't get any help when hers were born. Here I am thinking it was a nice geature.

If she says again I'm just going to say we have it in hand and don't think any further discussion is helpful.

 

[linz143]

We had DD's nursery mostly complete around 30 weeks last time, but only because I wanted to and was excited. I even had DH set up the crib at 20 weeks. And then I waited.... and waited... and waited.

DD was born at 41+1. On top of that she slept in our room until she was 16 weeks old. So her room sat completed and unused for almost 6 months!! This time we will be converting the office into the second nursery and we literally haven't done a thing at this point. Honestly I don't even know if it will be ready when we come home from the hospital, but I know it won't matter anyway since DD2 won't be sleeping in there for 3-4 months after she's born.

 

[RcdM]

Yeah what is the rush really. And the paint doesn't need 3 months to dry for the "fumes" to go away.

I had my daughter at 30 weeks. We had the room painted but no carpet, nothing was put together, it was completely bare and I didn't even have half the stuff we wanted even purchased yet.

Well guess what, when you have a baby that early, they stay in the NICU for a while. My daughter was there for 31 days. Which yes it was hard but that gave like 3 more weeks (once I was home) to get the room ready, which we did and everything was fine. And even if it wasn't ready, who cares. The baby doesn't know a darn of a difference if the room is painted or pictures are hung or their clothes are put away. All of that stuff is more for us parents than anything else!

 

[CastawayBride]

Yeah what is the rush really. And the paint doesn't need 3 months to dry for the "fumes" to go away.

I had my daughter at 30 weeks. We had the room painted but no carpet, nothing was put together, it was completely bare and I didn't even have half the stuff we wanted even purchased yet.

Well guess what, when you have a baby that early, they stay in the NICU for a while. My daughter was there for 31 days. Which yes it was hard but that gave like 3 more weeks (once I was home) to get the room ready, which we did and everything was fine. And even if it wasn't ready, who cares. The baby doesn't know a darn of a difference if the room is painted or pictures are hung or their clothes are put away. All of that stuff is more for us parents than anything else!

For me I would prefer the room done, especially with my son coming so early. If it does not bother you or OP then I say why stress over it? I am a planner by nature and this weekend already went to buy buy baby and dropped serious dough on items we will need. I will not be caught with nothing done again! LOL

 

[butterfly80]

Oh dear, why is she so obsessed?! And not being able to sleep

You do it when you are ready Hun and don't let her ruin it (deep breath and smile through gritted teeth) xxxxx