MIL rant!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by natasja32, Dec 11, 2009.

  1. natasja32

    natasja32 Mum to 4 boys

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    OMG girls im sorry,but i just want to scream and break something! She is doing my bloody head in now!! After we lost Bodhi i started smoking again,bad i know but it was my vice. Now since being pregnant again i have stoped,but i have a puff of hubbys every now and again. I know its wrong,but i dont smoke at all in the day or in the evening. I have a puff after my dinner. So now ive got her speaching to me about it,now i dont mind,it does anoy and irritate me,but i just let it go. But now she has started asking my kids behind my back wether mummy is smoking. I mean for goodness sake why involve my kids. She asks me and i say no,i have a puff and neils once in a while! Why is she putting my kids on the spot!!:growlmad: As if thats not bad enough she now has starting saying i need to get out the house more and my kids are bored because we dont take them out enough. She says all these things to my children. Its driving me potty.Everything has to go her way. Hubby doesnt smoke at her house out of respect and we follow the rules when we stay at theirs. So why cant she pay me the same respect???? She treats me like im six for god sake.:growlmad: Sorry im just so annoyed right nw. I have enough to deal with,i dont need a meddling mil sticking her oar into every part of our family life and the way we do things.:growlmad::growlmad: Sorry for the rant girls i feel better now.

    PS: I have done well with not smoking apart from the odd puff here and there but i dont get any credit for that! What i do is never good enough.
     
  2. Jadeyydoe

    Jadeyydoe Guest

    I got told by my midwife that if I ever want a cig I can, its better to have a cig once in a whie than to stress myself out so dont worry about that!
    Tell her to keep her nose out, I'm sorry shes being like that it would stress me out aswell!
     
  3. natasja32

    natasja32 Mum to 4 boys

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    I can understand if i was smoking 15 a day like i use to. But i light it for hubby after dinner thats it. I am really doing well not smoking. Hubby doesnt leave me siggies as i know if they are here i will be tempted. I have my little plastic siggie thing i put in my mouth. Im not even put down on my notes as a smoker because im not.Ive also been told its better to have one than none. Ugh i just dont know what to do. She will be the one person that drives me back to it.:growlmad: Ive spoken to her and so has hubby,not sure what to do next or how to deal with her interfering all the time.:shrug:
     
  4. alibaba24

    alibaba24 Well-Known Member

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    im so glad i dont have a mil to deal with!!!! god i know i would be driven dimented....

    well done on the smoking tell her my sis still smoked twenty a day that will shut her up :haha:

    ps i dont agree with my sis not trying to cut down (i dont get it as a non smoker so cant judge) but she did have 2 healthy sons

    xx
     
  5. tonyamanda

    tonyamanda 3rd trimester

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    this sound like my mother in law.. she was on the phone to me the other day telling me i can't just relax all day i should be doing stuff cause relaxing isn't good for the baby either she reckons (i did work the day before) ... she didn't even want a third grand child so why does she care..
    Why does MILs think they can give us advice etc? my mum never tells me what to do but my MIL thinks shes aloud to?.. sorry you have a MIL like mine hun.. my hubby did admit to me the other day he does feel embarrassed when she has her own opinions.. just wish they could Politely tell their mothers to shut it.. :hugs:
     
  6. Tesharika

    Tesharika Well-Known Member

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    Even if you were smoking more than just a puff here and there, she has no right sticking her nose in your business. You are a grown woman not a small child!
     
  7. NYCBride

    NYCBride Well-Known Member

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    i would ask my OH to have another word....

    Get him to say something to her like "Mum, I know you only wants best for all of us and we appreciate that, but its beginning to stress the missus out and the children as well. I dont want them feeling like whenever they see Nan they are going to get interrogated. We're doing the best we can, and we would very much like your support, but if that isnt forthcoming, then please refrain from saying anything"

    Maybe your OH just needs to make it really REALLY clear to her.

    I told my DH after his Mum (admittedly step but he considers her mum) had said "Isnt Jo jealous of your brother because he's got a healthy baby and hers wasnt so it died?" that she wasnt to talk to me about the baby we lost, or future babies we're having. She can be involved in our baby's life as a grandparent but I dont want anything to do with her, and I certainly wont have her interrogating my children about what I get up to in my life...

    Sorry hun, didnt mean to rant, Im just really mad for you! You dont need the stress right now, or at all and she should be trying to help, not undermine you!
     

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