money does matter, right?

[kiasuten]

how much money, if any, did you start saving when you found out you were pregnant? about how much did you spend on baby necessities?

my boyfriend starts his full-time job in july, when our baby is due. he'll be making about $1500 a month.

last month, he said he would start saving $300 every month for the baby. now, he said he's only putting away $1000 and that money should be enough to cover initial expenses.

i feel like he's being really selfish and he doesn't realize how much a baby can really cost. should i leave him be or continue to try to make him see that $1000 might not be enough?

 

[holly2234]

Well how much money you need can depend on what you want to buy. Whether you go with second hand or new etc. Also whether you can borrow any bits from friends and family who have had babies. There will obviously be ongoing expenses with the baby but to get all of the essentials before baby is born, i didnt spend all that much as i got a lot second hand. Good luck.

 

[kiasuten]

Well how much money you need can depend on what you want to buy. Whether you go with second hand or new etc. Also whether you can borrow any bits from friends and family who have had babies. There will obviously be ongoing expenses with the baby but to get all of the essentials before baby is born, i didnt spend all that much as i got a lot second hand. Good luck.

My boyfriend had the nerve to say he didn't want anything second hand, but got pissed off when I told him that he'd have to save the money to buy brand-new expensive stuff. I grew up on hand-me-downs, I have no problem with them.

I just don't want the baby to arrive and us be completely SOL because he doesn't want to cut down on the fast food and impulse buys.

 

[holly2234]

Maybe take him round a few baby stores to look at prices. He might change his mind quite quick! Ive got some lovely second hand things which have hardly been used, if at all and nobody would know they werent brand new unless i told them!

 

[rainbows_x]

We didn't save any. Babies don't need everything new & unnessacary.
We only spent around 500. Moses basket, bottles, clothes, bedding, pram included.

Are you putting money away too? Surely if you were to put away the same amount you would have more than enough?

 

[Yazz_n_bump]

Me and OH only spent around 600.
Babies do not need everything new & they certaintly do not need every single baby gadget.
With the money we spent, we have everything...

from cot to bouncer to high chair to sterilizer to a decent wardrobe of new clothing.


Babies are not expensive, unless you make them. How much are you putting away as in you and not your OH?
I really wouldn't worry, we didn't save.. we just brought when we had the money.

 

[amygwen]

We didn't save any. Babies don't need everything new & unnessacary.
We only spent around 500. Moses basket, bottles, clothes, bedding, pram included.

Are you putting money away too? Surely if you were to put away the same amount you would have more than enough?

I agree
I was really anal with my FOB to start saving before LO was born but I was saving too, realistically we didn't need a big amount of money, I was saving because for the first first weeks after Kenneth was born, I wouldn't get paid while on maternity leave. I think it's smart you want to start saving, but if BOTH you and your FOB save, than you will have more than enough by the time your baby is born.

 

[leoniebabey]

It's good to save up a bit but remember, babies wont know if there sleeping in a preloved crib ect.
Bargain hunt/lend things/accept things off people and buy 2nd Hand!!
If you keep to only the essentials in clothes then the costs shouldnt be TOO much, if your going to save up i'd buy cheap and then keep the money for when there here, nappes, wipes ect. The costs of those sure do mount up

 

[Char.due.jan]

I've added up what I've spent today and its around £2000.. But I have indulged on the luxuries and sacrificed things for myself for baby stuff.. I just love shopping for baby, more than myself!

 

[YoungNImum]

i didnt save :/ My family bought me some of the big items an my sister gave me alot from when she had her son, all i really needed to worry about buyin was everyday things like nappies clothes, and baby wipes, I only had a few brand new items and the 2nd hand stuff was like brand new anyway, my daughter dosnt no any difference just aslong as she has what she needs.
But is you wonted to buy brand new then why not if you have the money Why dont you sit down with Oh and write down everything you need and check out the price then add it all up?

 

[kiasuten]

From now until the baby's born, I can only save what I get back in a check from school because I'm not working, I'm an unpaid intern... but what I will be saving is equal to the amount that he said he would save.

I guess I'm more upset that he first said he would save money, and now he's backing out because he can't order food or spend money online as much as he would like. So I've given in-- I'll save what I think we need, and he'll save what he wants.

I just want to be prepared for everything.

 

[x__amour]

Money is definitely important. The more you can save up, the better off you're be. As I'm sure everyone has told you guys babies are helluva expensive, so try talking to him! You're not being selfish, just smart.

 

[nicole_]

weve been saving since the day we found out, me and OH now have over £5000 between us
spent over 1k on baby stuff already and thats not gunna be taken out the savings

i think you have to do it realistically and make sure you leave some for yourself. weve been saving £100 a week each and sold all our car parts, but i dont want him to have to go without the things he loves so we just found cheaper alternatives to mess with cars and just realise we can still have things we want, just have to wait a bit longer for them

 

[Yazz_n_bump]

From now until the baby's born, I can only save what I get back in a check from school because I'm not working, I'm an unpaid intern... but what I will be saving is equal to the amount that he said he would save.

I guess I'm more upset that he first said he would save money, and now he's backing out because he can't order food or spend money online as much as he would like. So I've given in-- I'll save what I think we need, and he'll save what he wants.

I just want to be prepared for everything.

He's still saving money, just not as much sweet. It's not like he's turned round and said 'your not getting ANY money,'.

 

[NicolleM.T.B.]

Babies are expensive, its probably worth both of you sitting down and working out what you need to buy and how much it all comes too. I dont think your being insensitive either, if you had a paid job you'd save more but obviously you arent so he has to pick up the slack a bit. Also the money you save doesnt have to just go on baby stuff for before they're born but will also help with after like nappies (cost a bloody fortune), milk (if your formula feeding) bathing things ect. Just try and keep calm, maybe when you've both budgeted you'll realise how much you need and that you'll either have enough or will need to save more. Good luck hun, hope you get it sorted.

 

[jenny_wren]

i didn't save any but then i didn't buy alot
of things brand new ...

emily's nearly 2 and including christmas and
birthday presents as well as nappies and clothes
in the last 2 years i've probably spent about
£1000 in total

pretty much everything we get is either second
hand or passed down, if i had the money to buy
everything new i would still get them second hand
to be honest, save whatever you think is good amount
buy what you like, there's no set rule for buying
things just get what you want ...

newborns don't need alot of things, children get more
expensive as they grow as long as you've got the essentials
you'll be fine ​

 

[xforuiholdonx]

OH and I couldnt really save at all, we were both working min wage jobs, and had bills to pay. luckily or families bought us the initial everything we needed, big and small. From clothes and bottles, to diapers, wipes and bathing things to crib. We honestly didnt need to start buying things for our seven month old until recently. Save what you can, thing like formula are expensive but also think about what you'd get from the baby showers, and just gifts from family.

 

[wasey]

haha! wow this reminds me of me and OH. the other month he got himself a £190 tattoo. The month after he spend £300 on a drumkit. every other day, no joke, he gets take out pizza. which usually comes to like £20 each time. oh, and he still lives with his parents. so it's not like he wouldn't get dinner, he just says "im getting pizza instead". i've spoke to him about it and he just has a go at me and tells me to stop lecturing him. but there's no need for him to spend that much at ALL.

he's right when he says as long as there's money left for baby it doesn't matter, but it shouldn't be 'money LEFT' for baby. it should be baby first and then random splurges on things.

i feel your pain, seriously haha. but anyways we've saved £160 (ooh, big money haha) so far, he plans on giving me between £100-£200 every month for essentials.

 

[bumpy_j]

don't think i've spent more than 300 and a lot of that went on things for the hospital. i got the moses basket, pram/pushchair/car seat thing, LOADS of clothes, cot,lots of bedding, bath and various bits and bobs given to me by people. i have bought our angelcare baby monitor second hand for about £46, a few second hand vests and sleepsuits, muslin squares, a second hand wilkinet, a new mattress, an NCT course and a few other things didn't cost much at all! i feel very prepared and although nearly everything bar a few small gifts are second hand they are in perfectly good condition! very chuffed with my free silvercross 3d... i still need to buy reusable nappies but after emailing around some people my midwife knew who'd used them i've been offered a lot of preloveds for free and am waiting for them to be sent to me - may splash out a lot on those though as they need to last for so long. after that only got a few grooming things to go, a thermometer, a baby towel, some bibs and i think that might be it? very surprised how cheap it's turned out and been able to buy things for myself like raspberry leaf tea and a birthing ball quite comfortably and am on a very low weekly budget so it's possible if you use ebay religiously or ask around as much as you can - there's nothing wrong with asking left right and centre because so many people will know someone who has lots of good condition baby stuff they no longer need

 

[xarlenex]

I think sitting down and looking at the big things yous are going to want for baby, then work it out from then how much you feel is right to put by monthly and hopefully yous can come to an agreement.

As alot of others have said, alot of things were bought for us. I think the biggest thing we bought was the cot, wardrobe, drawers and changing station. For that i'd say around £500. And for all the other little things bought maybe another £200. But I spent alot after he was born. That was a personal choice though, not necessary.