Mothers with 1 already..birth - plans?

[Abz1982]

Basically, I know its about 12 weeks away, but I am now trying to sort out what will happen when I have #2. I am thinking Elective C-sec is what will happen, so of course, we live 25 miles from the Maternity hospital, my sister is going to watch DD1, and OH will come with me. Now he doesn't drive, so Sis will also have to drive us back (she has offered). And then really, I shouldn't be driving for like 2 weeks at the very least - painkiller dependant.

I have this fear that MIL is going to want to come through and stay..........this freaks me out. Mainly as we have a 3 bed and so the wee room that is currently the guest will have to house the babys stuff - such as nappies and clothes etc. So don't want her staying in there, but on the same hand, dont want her kipping on the sofa as what if I want to get up with the baby and let OH sleep then I want ot be able to come downstairs. I also want to be able to, if I want to, walk about in my underware and hell, naked if I have to. Other thing is hot water...........sounds trivial but we have oil or immersion hot water, its a small tank - half fill a bath, so if one person has a bath, next person has to wait 2 hours for one and MIL wont have a shower for some unknown nutjob reason.

But everyone is like "but she will want to see the baby"..........Thats fine, i get that............but she can wait like everyone else, or come through to the town on the bus/train and then visit with baby and go home.

I also have another reason in that, I dont want DD1 to feel that she can get 100% attention or get away with things when new baby is here, which she will do as MIL lets her do whatever she wants as she is " only a baby really still" - no she is not she is 4 and needs to realise what is going on.


Anyone else in a similar situation? What are your plans?

 

[britgirl82]

My plans are totally different, but there is no way I would EVER let my MIL stay over whilst the baby was born/immediately afterwards.

You need your space: you need to be concerned with your new baby and your new family unit. You do not need to be worried about her.

Please talk to your husband and get him to stop her coming. Or at the very least tell her she needs to find a hotel/B&B. Having a second baby is stressful enough with the added worry of your already existing child: you don't need to add to it.

 

[ukgirl23]

You cant walk around naked after having a baby because of bleeding hehe yeh I wouldnt want my mil staying either and mine is actually lovely. If youre not happy with her being there then say so.

 

[sjminimac]

Oooooooh hell no. No no no. You need to be straight with her pretty soon really, let hubby know that it's nothing personal but NO ONE is staying over straight after baby is born x

 

[Abz1982]

You cant walk around naked after having a baby because of bleeding hehe yeh I wouldnt want my mil staying either and mine is actually lovely. If youre not happy with her being there then say so.

Well as close as poss. I had very little bleeding after having DD1.......only lasted about a week and even then was never more than a wee drip or two after the first 2 days.