Mummy blues, overeating, emotional stress and counselling

[Spudtastic]

I have 2 kids, 3yo and 10m. I do most of the parenting.

I don't think I have PnD but maybe a bit of mummy blues. I love my two kids but I can find being a mummy quite stressful, you know the crying, the tantrums, two kids wanting mum right now for two entirely different needs and I can't give 100% to both at the same time.

So I've always been an emotional eater but I've always been able to focus on weightless when I put my mind to it.

This is the first time in my life I have no control over the food I put in my mouth. I have a stressful time with the kids and to comfort myself I put food in my mouth. It is my comfort. It's also quick and doesn't involve anything to fit around kids. I give my all to others 5am to 8pm 7 days a week and night awakenings too. I can't seem to stop as it's such a comfort for me.
Hubby works 7 days a week so there's no he takes the kids. My eldest does do playschoool 2 days a week.

I've tried so much to stop but nothing nurtures my soul like putting food in my mouth.
But I have to stop as I'm just getting fatter.

Has anyone tried counselling to help with overeating. Counselling is not going to give me the love and good feeling that eating does.

If there's anything that has helped you I'd love to hear it.

 

[Diannam]

Nothing has worked so far, but if I did care to keep track calorie counting would help. The first time I lost weight it greatly helped.

I comfort eat too. I only have one child, a difficult one who hates naps which is a source of great stress to me because he is so overtired and unhappy throughout the day. I just eat to feel better. I can't imagine dealing with 2 from 5am to 8pm.

Just wanted to say you're not alone on stress eating related to having children and if you can find the time /energy that keeping track of all the calories and setting a goal amount it may help.

 

[xQuinnx]

I think counselling could definetly help as it could maybe look at what it's eating g that comforts you and maybe help you find another strategy. I've had counselling for a year but because of PND and it has completly changed my life. Good luck x

 

[Perplexed]

Sorry that this is an older topic...but I have something to add.

Counselling and psychotherapy can both help with your problem. I know how it feels when you are so stressed and exhausted and feel you have no control over anything that the only good things in your life are food. I used to have to eat a different dessert every. single. day. Even desserts I didn't like, just because I felt like crap and wanted to have control over something- anything. So I took to choosing dessert...

 

[Spudtastic]

Thanks perplexed. Do you still eat dessert every day? If not how did you stop?

 

[Perplexed]

Well, I think the first thing is that once my depression progressed, I just wasn't eating much, desserts and non-desserts. Everything felt tasteless and I had no appetite. It was only after the cloud has lifted that I was able to address the issue with overeating.

Firstly, I started to note what types of food caused me to binge eat. It was mainly cereal based foods, like cereal bars. If I had one then I always need 4 more. 1 is fine in the long term, but 5 a day is not. I simply stopped buying them so I wouldn't have them around the house.

I do allow myself a form of dessert. I recently started sort of calorie counting and I am allowed a low calorie treat. I try not to have it be something like biscuits or chocolates (I love both) every day, but I would say that I have chocolate twice a week and biscuits twice a week, but the portions are very controlled. I am not really a fruit person so I don't really eat fruits except for dates. I would say once a week I will have some really big dessert but my weight loss has plateaued so I should probably go without that.

What I'm trying to say is once I've come out of depression, it became easier to manage other aspects of my life. I should probably have brought up the eating issue, even in passing, at my therapy sessions but it just didn't come up because at the time the bigger issues were taking over.

Finding a good and understanding therapist can really help you figure out why you do certain things and what causes you to feel like you can only get comfort out of eating. For a long time I kept drinking a cup of warm milk with tea and cookies every night. And not just 1 cookie but a bunch, and when I was done I'd go get a bag of skittles or something. My body paid the price and my weight would increase so fast...it just hurt a lot...