my 16yo sister pregnant gossip :|

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by MummyMummy, Apr 14, 2009.

  1. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    picked nan up y/day and she said guess who's pregnant and mr.man said my mum and my nan was like nooo your sister and i was like what? shut up,noway (i was that shocked i told my nan to shut up :o) and she said my aunty and uncle(nans son) had told her. she said his gf had told my sister to go next door and talk to her daugther if need be :o nan told me not to say anything so obv i went down (to give/pick up easter eggs haha although they were a day late) after we dropped nan off and sis was at back door and seen our car and ran in hall/upstairs and came back with a big pink dressing gown and mr.man said she def had a curve to her :o the odd thing is her dressing gown didn't lay flat on her.and she was very interested in babys/scans and my bump/stretchmarks etc etc. :o

    i texted my mum last night saying something like never known her to beso interested in babies giveher 3monthsand shell be going for her own scan haha and she said don't be cursing her she's only 16 :o

    omg! i can't believe it that there's gossip that she's pregnant :o she's my sister but if she is i thinkshe's stupid, ireally do. way to go to ruin her life! i'm finding it hard to think supportive/positive thoughts, i really am. i sound horrible :|

    mum lives in 3 bed house with 6kids 3boys 1 room and 2girls in box roomon bunkbeds and baby in mums room. where would this potential new baby go?! plus they have no money/over 50 thou debt too.

    iknow i'm jumping to conclusions as mum/sis haven't actually said it but i'dbe v.surprised ifuncles gf got it wrong, she's a very accurate gossip.

    xXx
     
  2. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    You need to support her not tell her she's ruined her life. People make mistakes, it's what we do with (and how we handle) those mistakes that matters.
     
  3. jackiea85

    jackiea85 Mum of 2 boys

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    My mum got pregnant at 15 and didn't tell anyone because she was scared. Maybe your sister needs support rather than being told she has ruined her life. That way she can still do the things she wants and be a good mother. I don't think i've ruined my mum's life.
     
  4. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i'm really struggling to think happy thoughts though at the thought of her being preg, i really am. i was preg at 16 and it's no fun at all seeing everyone do things you can't. her friend hada kid like a year ago and my sis was always saying people were calling her names and she didn't like being with her friend cause she was preg and she used to complain her friend was always tired and didn't wanna hang out etc etc i just think she's stupid after moaning about all that and seeing me cry/go through to emotions of realising my life isn't mine with a baby i didn't want. all i can think is that she's just ruined any hope of a future by being stupid. you'd think she'd learn from other peoples mistakes.

    xXx
     
  5. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    Why should she learn from other peoples mistakes? If you did it, millions of other people have done it before you, why didn't you learn from their mistakes? Because we all make our own mistakes. Some of us make the same mistake twice.

    I can sympathise though. I didn't know what to think/say/do when I found out my sister was pregnant. I was never negative to her face though and still never will be.

    Shit happens doesn't it? People change when they're pregnant. I never wanted children, now I want 500!

    Try and have an open mind hun. It might be hard, but she'll need you x
     
  6. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i'msure she does and will need a hell of alot of support if she is, considering her idea of a fun night out is hanging around the streets with her friends getting up to 'mischief'/drinking :\ but i don't think i can offer her support right now, i just think she's silly :s and just wanna shake my head in disbelief, think that's what itmight be that i'm in shock that she could be pregnant :\ i can't comprehend it, she's so young and immature :s

    xXx
     
  7. AppleBlossom

    AppleBlossom Guest

    My mum got pregnant with me young so when I got pregnant young she was devastated because she knew how hard it was and how much you miss out on BUT because she knew how hard it was, instead of telling me I'd ruined my life etc and making things even worse she helped me out a lot. You should give her a little encouragement, not make her feel even more scared about telling people. It is a shame that she is pregnant so young but because of that she needs even more help and support from her family x
     
  8. jackiea85

    jackiea85 Mum of 2 boys

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    But if it's still only gossip and she is definitely pregnant it might mean she is too scared to tell anyone because everyone thinks she is silly and immature. How long do you think she will keep it to herself? Will she wait until someone notices? And if she isn't telling anyone, has she been to a doctor to make sure everything is ok? By supporting her you aren't encouraging her to be a teenage mum, which you're obviously not happy with, but she does need advice on how to take care of herself and the baby. By ignoring the pregnancy or being angry about it, it won't make it go away xx
     
  9. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    because i was stupid, i didn't learn for the simple reason i was stupid! i didn't know anybody who was young and preg like she did though who said it's hard work/you can't go/do anything etc etc. she seen her bestfriend at the time go through it all, not just me. if i could have put my pregnancy on hold i would and i still stand by that even now, i'd have much rather waited. not just for the baby but for a partner iactually really liked and was interested in. nobody has met/seen/heard of any boyfriends at all she's had/got :S

    she dropped out of school, well got kicked out and wouldn't even go to the groups that are put on for people who get kicked out of school and isn't interested in getting a job/going to college... all she wants to do is just stay in or go hanging out around the streets :\ and i can't see her changing in reguard to working/college etc. omg, what on earth is she gonna dowith a baby :S where will the baby go :S my mums def not the best role model on parenting :| gosh :|

    xXx
     
  10. csmummu

    csmummu Home to Charlie.

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    maybe you should ask your sister out right theres no point being worried about how your going to react if theres nothing to react to.

    If she is pregnant and not told anyone shes proberbly terrified! she will need someone to tell its a burning secret to try and keep! If you cant handle it you need to get her to tell her mum who needs to know to help her out. yes shes your sister but your not the one to support / help her thats a mums job.

    as for the the "baby" is going to sleep this is why if she is pregnant people need to know now no point finding out when shes in labour!
     
  11. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i've not said anything to her or my mum, i think i'll probally just keep away/out of it to be honest, i don't often go my mums plus i have my own family to look after - of course if she wants anything from me then she knows where i am :) i'm waiting to see if they actually say anything as all i know is what uncles gf has been told and then gossip'd on to my nan. but like i said i'd be v.surprised if she was wrong.

    xXx
     
  12. leighbaby

    leighbaby yummy mummy

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    Wowsers, my friend's sis got preggo at 16. She was absolutely disgusted and kept getting upset for her sis cos she thought her sis had ruined her life. Now my friend is completely in love with her niece and wouldn't have it any other way! Both mum and little girl are doing fabulously and mum works at the nursery that her little girl attends. It isn't always doom and gloom!
     
  13. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i'm assuming as my uncles gf knows my mum has told her so my mum knows. god knows what she's doing about looking after herself :S mum and my brother still smoking around her, sis still arguing/shouting/swearing at younger brother and chasing him around. mum never did bother to take the best care of herself when she was preg so who knows? but i can't say anything as i've been told not to say anything :|

    i'm not angry, i'm disapointed which is worse, i know :( i just wanted more for her, to actually do something with her life to start making an effort with her education, to get herself sorted out... to not end up like everyother stereotypical council estate girl in the world. i know i don't see my family much now but it doesn't mean i don't think about her or want better for her than where she is, she was actually going to move in with us so that she would be out of the enviroment she's in now aka at home, untill we had a falling out after i spoke to a connextions advisor about her being depressed and overdosing and at that time having no friends and somethingelse happening... i was really worried for her and as usual mum wasn't interested so after much debating and talking to mr.man i asked a dare i say itan outsider to step in and help, and then we fell out because i was 'interfering' :( but i was justreally worried. i really hope that if she is preg she doesn't just settle for living on the same council estate she grew up on and does pull herself together :(
    xXx
     
  14. Kimboowee

    Kimboowee Complete

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    I would actually wait til its confirmed or denied before jumping to conclusions.
     
  15. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i have no doubt that once this maybe baby is born i will be head overheels, it's just the thought of her being preg so young with no desire to do anything to better herself and what she is potentially missing out on, and worrying about what she'll do/where she'll live/how she'll afford things :(

    xXx
     
  16. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    How do you know she isn't with the dad still? And if she has no desire to better herself maybe this is as good as it gets and she wouldn't be any different if she was 30?!



    Sorry, sometimes I'm so open minded my brain escapes.
     
  17. princess_vix

    princess_vix Guest

    i don't think shes stupid and ruined her life...

    i'm 16..and made a mistake it easily happens and i really don't think my life is over just because there's a child involved.
    she needs support not people telling her shes done wrong...she knows that..she needs help.
     
  18. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    the thought of it alone without confirmation is v. worrying! like i said uncles gf never gets her gossip wrong *rolls eyes* she seems to know things before the person it's about knows!, the running for the dressing gown, all the baby talk. all very strange. i really really hope that this one time uncles gf is wrong!

    xXx
     
  19. leighbaby

    leighbaby yummy mummy

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    Sometimes things like this motivate people to change and get more from life. Encourage her to do the same - she CAN build a great life for herself and her baby if she wants. (Thats if the rumours are true!)

    We only know what we read on here, so if you are worried, then she probably definately needs support from someone. If you don't think your mum can help then maybe she has a social worker you can contact?

    :hugs: to you, this isn't an easy situation to be in. We all want the best for the people we love.
     
  20. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    she never mentions any boyfriends, we've seen the kind of boys she hangs out with... but never been told if they are boyfriends or not so who knows? although after seeing some of them lads and knowing what they get up to eg/ breaking into peoples property i hope to god that it isn't a friend she hangs out with :|


    xXx
     

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