my body killed my baby

[mirakel]

I have a history of immune system attacking my body, like my hair when I was five and my thryoid when I was 23.
Now I started having a pink discharge on saturday and had been having vaginal cramping the last week before the pink discharge.
It stopped on sunday and monday.
But started bleeding heavier on tuesday and today its been a lot of clots.
I know I lost my baby.
Fact is on tuesday I had a scan (before the bleeding got heavier) and they said they cant understand where the bleeding is coming from and that the baby looks perfectly fine. I was 6+6 then.

Now I am thinking my immune system is killed my baby.

Does this mean that from now on it will kill every baby?

We have no problems of getting pregnant.

And I have two kids from before but obviously my immune system was sweeter back then.
The dr said it must of been something wrong with the baby but I don't buy that as the baby was measuring spot on and everything looked perfect when I was already bleeding and the day after my body had rejected it and it was dead. Gone.


Please help me, I feel like dying and just giving up and letting my man go. He deserves someone who can give him a baby.

 

[Royche1]

I'm really sorry for ur loss. My body did thecsanecstage being our twins back in Nov at 7 weeks. I have systemic lupus do it's been hard force to stay pregnant. I suggest looking into seeing a reproductive immunologist. They will let u know exactly what is happening with ur body, why it is keeping u from staying pregnant, and will help u with ur next attempt of getting pregnant. For me I can't try on my own anymore, but will be going thru a surrogate now. The hardest part is getting over the fact that your body is killing the baby. It took a while for me to stop thinking that way. I'm sorry this happened to you.

 

[lisap2008]

I am so sorry , the only way to know if the baby is gone is go in for a scan asap. You need to find a doctor who specializes in immune disorders they will put you through testing and know what to put you on to help you carry to term.
I know its painful been through 4 losses myself but dont give up.

 

[mirakel]

I went for two scans, one when the bleeding had started and the baby looked just fine, measured spot on and everything just looked perfect, she couldnt see why I was bleeding.
Then I started cramping and bleeding more so I went in for a scan two days later and the baby was gone.
Entirely gone.
They call it spontaneous abortion and said to me something was wrong with the baby. But I do not buy that because my immune system has before attacked my body, like my hair, thyroid etc.
And now apparently its attacking babies.
Is it one off? Or will it continue to do this from now on?

I read once you see a heartbeat the risk of having a miscarriage is between 4-5 percent after seeing it in week 6.
So why would my baby die when it had a heartbeat, I mean the bleeding started before the baby died. And before the bleeding I had severe cramps in my vagina with the feeling the baby was going to fall out (all that stopped once I started bleeding).

Unfortunately we have to go through more losses before we get any help here (two more), and we cant pay private (we dont have that good economy to pay for that).

I am heartbroken. I'm pendling from breaking up with him to spare him more pain being with me. And I am already 31 years old. God knows how long it may take until we are up to the losses that we need to get any help.¨

I am totally devastated.

I don't know what to do.
Every day is a living hell.
If only the baby wouldn't of been alive at the scan then I would of thought something was wrong with it but why would my body reject a baby that had a heartbeat and looked perfectly fine?

Obviously the dr at the hospital tried to tell me something was wrong with the baby but I know for a fact that a healthy body does not reject a baby with a heartbeat like mine did and it was trying for like a week to kill it before it suceeded (the pains in my vagina etc).

I just dont know what to do.
I honestly feel like dying.

 

[mirakel]

And also I have a cyst on one of my ovaries, I never had that before in my entire life but according to the dr that couldnt of killed the baby.
I will try to beg my thyroid dr if he can help us but seriously the reproductive team here wont take you until you have had three losses which I think is so unfair because 1. my age 2. my immune history.

 

[mirakel]

And they wont make any exemptions either, I am broken into pieces.
I feel like I have lost my entire world.

 

[Hollys_Twinny]

Sorry for your loss

 

[mirakel]

I just told my mother and she says it could of been something wrong with the baby, but I don't buy that, how can it be alive with a nice heartbeat while I was bleeding and then the next day it's dead if it was something wrong with it?
As far as I know the baby dies first then the body reject it as it recognizes something was wrong. The body doesn't get notified by such when the baby is alive does it? Because I was bleeding when the baby was alive and then I got cramps and my body rejected it.


How can the baby look perfectly fine and then be rejected by my body the next day if something was wrong with the baby?

 

[MissConduct]

Never give up hope because of immune system issues. Immunology is so well-studied today that there are multiple things that they can do if it is an issue of your immune system (eg. immunosuppressants). That being said, as someone who has a chronic autoimmune disease, I've never heard of this before. A healthy body can reject a baby at any stage if there is something critically wrong with it, even if it appears healthy from one day to the next. So go along with your doctor and hang in there.

 

[pinktree1981]

Really sorry to hear this mirakel. Just a thought - one of my friends sadly had a miscarriage and they sent some of the loss for genetic testing - turned out it had a genetic syndrome incompatible with survival. Although it didn't make it any easier, it gave them some reassurance.

 

[claireybell]

So sorry for your loss Mirakel.. Xxx please dont give up hope, sometimes it can be something so simple that just needs a bit if help with.. A friend of mine had had numerous miscarriages, stillborn turns out she had something up with her blood, sticky etc.. Once they sorted that out, she fell pg again & has since had a health baby boy who is now 3. Never give up, lots of hugs hun xx

 

[mirakel]

So there is a chance that there was something wrong with the baby and it wasn't my immune system? Because the dr said everything looks perfectly fine (even when the bleeding and cramping had started) and baby, sac and yolk measured perfectly and heartbeat was perfect. And one day later it's dead? To me it seems it's my immune system, but is there a chance that a body starts rejecting a living baby when it's something wrong with it? How does the body know something is wrong with it so many days before and why did the baby continue to develop? (Like I said I had cramps in my vagina like a week before the actual bleeding started so obviously the baby was continuing to develop while this was going on).

What gets me if it's my immune system is my advancing age, 31, and that we may have years ahead of us until they help us (we have to have two more proven miscarriages until we are entitled to get help).

I don't know. I am so sincerely hoping it was something wrong with the baby but deep down in my heart I am almost certain it is my own body that killed this little one.

 

[lisap2008]

I just told my mother and she says it could of been something wrong with the baby, but I don't buy that, how can it be alive with a nice heartbeat while I was bleeding and then the next day it's dead if it was something wrong with it?
As far as I know the baby dies first then the body reject it as it recognizes something was wrong. The body doesn't get notified by such when the baby is alive does it? Because I was bleeding when the baby was alive and then I got cramps and my body rejected it.


How can the baby look perfectly fine and then be rejected by my body the next day if something was wrong with the baby?

A TTC buddy of mine got to 10 weeks then miscarried, once she passed the baby they did testing and found it had downs syndrome. so yes things can look perfect at a first scan and miscarry later do to chromosomal abnormalities, Up to 70 percent of first-trimester miscarriages, and 20 percent of second-trimester miscarriages, are caused by chromosomal anomalies. I would definitely insist on immune testing though.

 

[mirakel]

I am going to make my thyroid doctor give me suppressants next time, I just hope he does it, can't do any harm. I don't think I can handle yet another loss, especially not my bf. He just keeps the sorrow inside but it gets him more than me and I feel very very bad.

 

[lisap2008]

So there is a chance that there was something wrong with the baby and it wasn't my immune system? Because the dr said everything looks perfectly fine (even when the bleeding and cramping had started) and baby, sac and yolk measured perfectly and heartbeat was perfect. And one day later it's dead? To me it seems it's my immune system, but is there a chance that a body starts rejecting a living baby when it's something wrong with it? How does the body know something is wrong with it so many days before and why did the baby continue to develop? (Like I said I had cramps in my vagina like a week before the actual bleeding started so obviously the baby was continuing to develop while this was going on).

What gets me if it's my immune system is my advancing age, 31, and that we may have years ahead of us until they help us (we have to have two more proven miscarriages until we are entitled to get help).

I don't know. I am so sincerely hoping it was something wrong with the baby but deep down in my heart I am almost certain it is my own body that killed this little one.

6 weeks is too early to diagnose a chromosome abnormality so yes things can "look" perfect early on then go on to either miscarry or get diagnosed at 12+ weeks and even then the amino is the only 100% accurate test.

 

[mirakel]

I realize that.
What I am reacting on is that the baby was alive on tuesday and everything looked ok in my uterus and with pregnancy (she didnt even have any idea where the bleeding came from). And then the next day the baby is not in my uterus anymore and obvious dead. What makes a body reject a living fetus?

 

[lisap2008]

I am going to make my thyroid doctor give me suppressants next time, I just hope he does it, can't do any harm. I don't think I can handle yet another loss, especially not my bf. He just keeps the sorrow inside but it gets him more than me and I feel very very bad.

I think the suppressants are a good idea ,along with extra folate if your not taking it already 5mg would be the desired dose. so sorry for your loss.

 

[mirakel]

I started bleeding WHILE the baby was alive and everything looked perfect on the scan and the next day I have passed the baby and it's gone. How is that even possible unless it was my own body that rejected the baby? Because it had been going on for like a week before it actually happened (i mean cramping pains).

 

[mirakel]

I am going to make my thyroid doctor give me suppressants next time, I just hope he does it, can't do any harm. I don't think I can handle yet another loss, especially not my bf. He just keeps the sorrow inside but it gets him more than me and I feel very very bad.

I think the suppressants are a good idea ,along with extra folate if your not taking it already 5mg would be the desired dose. so sorry for your loss.

5m folate?

I am not sure my dr will prescribe suppressants, is this possible to buy online?

 

[mirakel]

Swedish drs are so into following the rules and procedures and if we are going to do that we have to go through two more losses.

I cant believe something was wrong with the baby, it seems very weird if it was because I bled when the baby looked perfectly well and alive and the next day it's dead. It seems more like the process of my body killing it?
What do you ladies think?