My breastfeeding rant...... 10 months built up

[Betheney]

AAAAAAAARGHGGHGHGHGHG

Over the last 10 months i've had a few things that have really rubbed me the wrong way and i'm finally going to get them off my chest and being the breastfeeding section i thought it would be best here. I've never complained about some of them because i don't want to sound like a snobby breastfeeder but i just want to get it all out.

First thing is my MIL she bought me a light blanket as a present when i was pregnant that she pointed out was for "feeding in front of people" she kept saying how someone she knew used one and it was "so nice to just sit and be able to feed discretely, while we talked to her" It has always annoyed me! while i'm a bit of a private feeder i found it insulting, like i have to hide doing it.

Secondly is my FIL he told my brother in law off for being in the same room as me when i was feeding and how he "better not be looking", i then told him that i asked him to be there because i get so bored on my own.

Three! I hate that the few women I KNOW (not ALL women just the ones i know) that FF feed always down play my breastfeeding. I understand FF is the best for them and their little ones and you have to do what's best. But they act as if FF is JUST AS good as BF and i should just give her a bottle. I'm always very polite and just nod my head but it really boils my blood.

Four - I also get frustrated with my friends who won't give breastfeeding a chance, i have no problem with women who can't breastfeed and who try their hearts out but i know women who before day 3 have their babies on a bottle and this makes me so so so sad. I try and not be the pushy annoying pro breastfeeder, i try to just support quietly on the sidelines but they just give it such a short try. Maybe it is possible to have a horrific unreversable experience in 3 days but their hearts were never in it to begin with, so it wasn't an issue for them to just switch. But this really makes me sad... these babies are missing out on the benefits of BF and so are the mummies.

Five - Another MIL one is tbat she is CONSTANTLY saying "oh you don't want to get bitten now she has teeth" i must hear this everytime she calls and she also tell's me the story of how her hairdresser got bitten by her baby and now it's infected and she had to go to hospital, seriously i must of heard that story about 60 times.

Six - This is just a short rant for something that i experienced today that i've never experienced before and i wasn't expecting to get so soon. I was at my old work and there's a lady there who is a grandmother of a baby the same age as Eva, she asked if she could give her a chip i said no and explained it's not because it's a chip or anything it's because if she eat's it she wont have her breastmilk when she gets home and she replied "OH...... are you still doing that???" i was so shocked all i could say was "yes...." i mean i'm not exaggerating, her voice had the tone of disgust and shock! seriously! Eva is 10 months and i plan to do it for alot longer.

EDITED FOR SOME MORE!

7 - Although i was unsure myself about wanting it to be Eva's first word she does say the word "booby" when she's hungry. and my MIL HATES IT!! If you try and encourage her to say booby my MIL says "no stop it! we don't want that as her first word" She thinks it's yucky. I told her why on earth not! why can't Eva's first word be booby? it's endearing and i love it. Now when i initially was trying to phase out the word booby i'm practically whispering it in her ear as she goes to sleep. lol.

Thanks for the rant, i don't even mind if nobody comments i've just always wanted to say all that

 

[RaspberryK]

I have only been feeding for two weeks and I'm already wanting to do a rant post!

xx

 

[Betheney]

hahahahahahaha i was thinking when i sat down of all the rage i had when i started and over the last 10 months but then once i started typing i have forgotten half of it.

 

[MrsLo]

I could have typed this myself. Especially the bit about ff friends not understanding how good bf is. Ugggghhhhhh... It is so hard not to get up on my soapbox and TELL them!!!

 

[heather91]

Such a shame you're getting negative comments. I've only ever had positive things said, but then im only 3 weeks in! Don't feel too harshly about FF, I FF my daughter and felt as if I had tried to BF. I gave up at the first hurdle but I by no means feel guilty about it or feel like I should have tried with every inch of my being to BF. I did what was best for me at the time. BF requires loads of support and a lot of women don't have that for one reason or another She's a happy healthy toddler as im sure my BF son will be!

 

[RaspberryK]

I think you just have to be determined, I don't have much support ,DH isn't negative but he's just not around a lot- working in the day and sleeping at night.
Everyone else kept saying that I'd have to top up with formula because he's a big baby and you don't have enough milk in the beginning and that it's OK to do that if you don't have enough - I know they are just uneducated but it is annoying.
The in laws were hounding me before my milk came in and kept saying that their kids were FF so there's nothing wrong with it. Which there isn't but BF is better and they didn't understand that it's totally normal and there's still the colostrum in the first few days.
Also the amount of people who have said I bet I wish I FF so that I could have an afternoon/night off - errr no I don't actually want to leave him with anyoe right now and BF is the perfect excuse.

x

 

[kerrie24]

Yeah peoples comments and attitudes about bf can annoy me.Ive gotten to a point now where I am so confident I couldnt care less!I bf Owen on the bus earlier today,nobody noticed,but it was either that or have him pulling my top saying "that,that" all the way home lol.

 

[Pessimistic]

Haha, your MIL bought you a blanket for bfing at least! Mine stocked up on formula to keep at hers and kept asking 'have you got the bottles sorted?' not even asking how I intend to feed!

 

[Lilly12]

I hear stuff like that too.
People are so ignorant.
This guy I know keeps saying "oh she's teething, you'll know when a tooth comes through, then it's time to stop bf'ing" ...
Ehhh ok? Dumbass lol.

 

[Lilly12]

Yeah peoples comments and attitudes about bf can annoy me.Ive gotten to a point now where I am so confident I couldnt care less!I bf Owen on the bus earlier today,nobody noticed,but it was either that or have him pulling my top saying "that,that" all the way home lol.

 

[kerrie24]

I hear stuff like that too.
People are so ignorant.
This guy I know keeps saying "oh she's teething, you'll know when a tooth comes through, then it's time to stop bf'ing" ...
Ehhh ok? Dumbass lol.

Owen had 2 teeth at 13 weeks old,like I was going to stop then!

 

[booda]

Loved your post - not the people you are referring to, I totally understand and it's not snobby at all - especially when it feels like we go to so much effort to BF successfully and others just downplay it like it's pointless and a waste of time.

My mum even tried to get me to FF and put me of breastfeeding - went on and on about how BF is weird and difficult and inconvenient and *insert another dozen negative reasons here*, i tried to explain about the health benefits for me AND baby, including the decrease in hip fractures in myself (i have osteoporosis so this is a BIG advantage IMO!) and eventually after i had it out with her, shouted at her that i was GOING TO FU****G BREASTFEED WHETHER SHE LIKED IT OR NOT!!!!!!!! she then backed down, looked all sheepish and said "but its NOT FAIR, that means that G (my OH) and me will never get to feed him, I wanted to be able to give him his bottle sometimes" and looked really hurt and upset! I ended up feeling guilty!!
So effing frustrating......................

 

[KerryGold]

I agree with your comments about your friends. Only 2 of us from my NCT group are still exclusively BFing and any problems 'would be solved by formula'.

I also know a bunch of girls who are 'aiming to give up by 6 months'. Most have 5-month olds who are boob morning and bedtime and formula the rest. I just don't understand the logic!!!

I go to a BF group now just to meet some likeminded mummies!

xXx

 

[Lilly12]

I agree with your comments about your friends. Only 2 of us from my NCT group are still exclusively BFing and any problems 'would be solved by formula'.

I also know a bunch of girls who are 'aiming to give up by 6 months'. Most have 5-month olds who are boob morning and bedtime and formula the rest. I just don't understand the logic!!!

I go to a BF group now just to meet some likeminded mummies!

xXx

Yea I don't get that logic... you came this far, why quit now?

 

[KarenMc]

My biggest peev is that we are on a bf forum but still feel the need to write in a way so as nit to upset firmula feeders. Why r they even reading bf posts, I dont hang out in the ff forum pages

 

[Lilly12]

My biggest peev is that we are on a bf forum but still feel the need to write in a way so as nit to upset firmula feeders. Why r they even reading bf posts, I dont hang out in the ff forum pages

Agreed

 

[cheese lover]

I feel like I need to add a couple things I've been holding onto.
First, my SIL asked if I had tried putting cereal in her bottle to get her to sleep longer. Ok so I'm going to pump a bottle of milk and put cereal in it to see if she might sleep longer? Nevermind all the things that are wrong about feeding an 8 week old a bottle of milk and cereal.

Second, I fed LO a bottle of expressed milk so she would get used to a bottle when my MIL and FIL were at our house and my MIL said "she looks so cute drinking from that bottle". I didn't even know how to respond! I think she's so much cuter when she's drinking from my breast!

 

[heather91]

My biggest peev is that we are on a bf forum but still feel the need to write in a way so as nit to upset firmula feeders. Why r they even reading bf posts, I dont hang out in the ff forum pages

Agreed

I go in both because I've FF one child and BF the other. People get offended way too easily though, I don't care what people think!

 

[nickyXjayno]

My biggest peev is that we are on a bf forum but still feel the need to write in a way so as nit to upset firmula feeders. Why r they even reading bf posts, I dont hang out in the ff forum pages

Agreed

I go in both because I've FF one child and BF the other. People get offended way too easily though, I don't care what people think!

It's the same with natural birthing.
Someone made a thread about feeling empowered or something about giving birth naturally as possible and she was slated to death!
Apparently she was subtly insulting those who had epis or c-sections .

At the end of the day if you are in a section dedicated to natural stuff you should be able to talk about it and feel good without worrying about every other word you type.

I haven't even had my baby yet but as soon as they hear I want to BF it's all negativity, a lot from inlaws as they want to baby sit *cough* steal my baby

 

[lovealittle1]

Hey babe! Must've felt great to get that out!!

I have those friends too that say "they couldn't" BF but basically their hearts were never in so they just went to formula on day 1 or 2. To each their own but please don't tell the world you couldn't BF.

That women is so quick to give Eva a chip but frowns upon breastmilk like wtf!

I am so sick of tiptoeing around ff mummies in fear of insulting them! Can't I be proud of bfing? Dont tell me I am lucky either! I worked so hard to breastfeed with emcs, slow weight gain, delayed milk, flat nipples and nurses trying to to force ff on us. I am not lucky I am determined!

The biting thing really does my head in. Even if I did get bitten lots (I've been bitten a few times) I wouldnt quit! My baby always comes before me so a little bite here and there does not change that fact! Why is It anyone's business anyway if I do get bitten?