Names?? What would you do?!?!

[Newmommy2011]

I've had my heart set on Esther Marie for years if I have a girl, but my boyfriend doesn't like it!!!!!! What do I do now? I always said I wouldn't care what he thought. I carried it for 9 months and will name her/him whatever I want, but now that it's here I can't help but want him to love the name too! What would you do??

 

[crystal09]

I would say that u guys need to agree on a name that is going to work for both of you. My hubby and I have always had it where i pick the first name and he picks the middle name. (we have two kids now and 1 on the way).

 

[Newmommy2011]

Even if he doesn't like the first name, or do you talk over both of them? He already has 2 kids with his ex, and this is probably the only chance I get to choose a name. We may decide later to have a second, but I'm not sure.... I just feel like I should be able to choose since he's already gotten to do that...

 

[menageriemom]

It's a beautiful name, first off!

It is our OH's child too - so if they plan to be an involved parent, helping choose and settle on a name is their right. Do you know for sure he picked his other children's names, or are you assuming? Maybe ask him what he doesn't like about the name? It may be possible to tweak it just slightly to his liking. It also may grow on him!

 

[Newmommy2011]

He says it sounds like an old ladies name!! I know he did. His oldest has his first name, and his second has his dads middle name... We've talked about it and he doesn't really have any real reasons why he doesn't like it! He just doesn't want her to get made fun of, but I don't see what kids would make fun of it!!!!

 

[darkNlovely]

Sorry hun but I am gonna have to agree with boyfriend on this one there must be names that you both would like. I think the both of you should have a input!

 

[Newmommy2011]

I don't disagree with him but I don't agree with him either lol. I want his input, but he's not giving me any! And then bashes the name I choose!! Men!! Lol

 

[darkNlovely]

I don't disagree with him but I don't agree with him either lol. I want his input, but he's not giving me any! And then bashes the name I choose!! Men!! Lol

I know men, drive us nuts but can't do without them

 

[chysantheMUM]

I agree, you have to find a name that your both comfortable with, if you don't it might just lead to resentment later down the line, with perhaps worse case scenario him feeling that he can't connect with the child because of the name barrier. My OH, ridiculed and laughed at all the names which I had in mind, but we have ended up with a happy compromise. I just kept a look out for other names which I would be happy with (even though they weren't my first choices) and eventually we managed to agree on some, we've now got first and middle names agreed on for both boy and girl. Not only that but the names we've decided on, I myself have really become quite attached to over the past few weeks since we settled on them and I'm now starting to think that our joint efforts have actually come up with better than what I was originally thinking of. So put your heads together and see what you come up with, you might be pleasantly surprised by the results

 

[allaboard]

I'll go against the grain and say if you love it so much then hope he comes around to it more and just back off him a bit.

Maybe say he can chose the next baby's name. Or if she comes out a he. Of maybe a nickname you won't mind him calling her that he likes. Or agree on a back up if you can! Then ask him again when you've jsut had her and he's in awe of you lol.

After all, when baby is born she will just BE the name you give her and he'll eventually love it as he will lover her if she is called Esther.

My DB hates the boy name I'm desperate for, but i love it and can see us with a child of that name. He was adamant, ie "no way, not ever" but it's more an acceptance on his part now...he says "i'm sure it'll be a boy and end up with that horrendous name" haha.

Esther is a bit old fashioned, but they are pretty names and there are lots of old lady names around now! ALL names are based on trends unless you chose a classic timeless name like Elizabeth or a Catherine.

 

[xsarahbellax]

My hubby has said no to my name choices I absolutley love Millie for a girl, but he's 100% against it. I'm hoping he'll miraculously change his mind, but deep down I know he won't, & although I'm gutted, this is as much his child as it is mine & we have to come up with a name we're both happy with.

 

[Rachel_C]

I do think it's important for both parents to be ok with the name choice. Just because he's been able to choose in the past doesn't mean he shouldn't want to be involved with the choice this time. That's like saying that because he's already chosen baby clothes or schools or done all the 'firsts' before he shouldn't be as interested this time as you are! I'm sure you want him to be just as interested this time as he was with his other children, it would be a real shame if he wasn't.

Could you compromise and say that you will choose a girl's name and he will choose a boy's name, or that you will choose the first name if it's a girl and he can choose the second name and the other way round if it's a boy? Or maybe even give the baby three names - with something you both agree on for the first name, then Esther Marie or Esther-Marie as the second (and third) names? Parents often have different nicknames for their LOs and I know a lot of people who use their middle name as their normal name so you could still call her Esther if you wanted!

 

[K4tiemay]

My boyfriend told me that lots of the names I liked were old ladies names. He didn't like Esther either, or Iris, both of which I thought were beautiful. I wrote him a huge list and he axed 80% of it. Fortunately the ones he liked were some of my favourites. Your baby will grow into whatever name you give him/her and that will be just the same if you are flexible than if he is.
Also - I actually know a guy who calls his daughter by a different name than his partner because she went ahead and named her something he didn't like - needless to say, they were never 'love's young dream' so they aren't everyones example
but anyway, you'll love your baby just the same whatever she's called. Do you like any of his choices?
xx

 

[KatieMRi]

I would get him to write down what he does like and then cross the ones you don't like out and agree on one of the ones you both like, that's the plan with my OH as he doesn't like Alyssa. Men!!

 

[littlenic]

I'd just start calling your bump Esther Marie and hope he gets used to it.

My DH is trying that tactic with me at the moment by calling ours Icarus...clearly for this strategy to work you have to pick a reasonable name and in the grand scheme of head kickings in the playground, Icarus is 100 times more likely to elicit a response than Esther!!

 

[Miniwilf2]

Problem might solve itself in a few weeks if you find out you are having a boy??!

 

[Newmommy2011]

He doesn't hate the name and I think he's coming around (slowly) my thing is my mom was only able to have one, so that's why I'm pushing this so much. I want my bf to be really involved don't get me wrong, but my mom has always been my best friend and I want that with our baby... I think that's part of why I want this name so bad, but I don't really know. I love the story in the bible, I don't see how kids can turn it around and make fun of her, it just seems so perfect!!

 

[Shutterbug_71]

its hard when you have a name that you have your heart set on and that your boyfriend dont like the name, i agree on trying to find a name that you both will like, My daughters name is Rose Marie with is an old name but i love it and not many children have that name, I would like to name this baby Rita Elizibeth if its a girl Rita after my grandmother.. And my husband said that he done like that name because that is an old name, and i said well so is Rose blah blah blah...I am pretty set on my name for a girl. maybe if you talk to him you guys can work it out...? good luck hope all works out for you..

 

[Newmommy2011]

I'd just start calling your bump Esther Marie and hope he gets used to it.

My DH is trying that tactic with me at the moment by calling ours Icarus...clearly for this strategy to work you have to pick a reasonable name and in the grand scheme of head kickings in the playground, Icarus is 100 times more likely to elicit a response than Esther!!

That's a great idea!!!!!! I think he'll get used to it. The only problem is were both really stubborn! Lol that's probably another reason I'm so adimit on this name! Lol

And we all think it's a girl! Lol ever since we've found out we've only been looking at girl stuff, calling the baby she. His dad had 2 boys and 1 girl, and he thinks he's going to do the exact same thing.

 

[menageriemom]

Esther is a pretty tame name compared to some that are now popular. Kids can find a way to make fun of even the most common names in the book. As long as you avoid issues like bad initials (grew up with a kid that got hell for his being P.P.) - it doesn't have much basis.