Need some advice, but please don't judge...

Discussion in 'Toddler & Pre-School' started by Danilou1910, Dec 14, 2009.

  1. Danilou1910

    Danilou1910 Mammy to 1-Charlie

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    I have just been reading the thread about treats for LO's.

    Basically when we were little we did have one treat a day after our tea if we ate it all. And when I had my LO i wanted his treats to be fruit etc and to have a real treat 1 or twice a week.

    From about 10 months his daily treat was dried raisins, apricots, boiled apple/pear and he got a great love for fruit, and he was a great eater when it came to veg.

    Anyway, every time I went to MIL she would push sweets on him and would make me feel guilty when I said no. For a while I managed to talk her round to giving him grapes etc as a treat and she bought things in just for him. Then when my SIL had her son who is only 14 months has always had a lump of choc in his hand (he is a big boy, ah but gorgeous), he was even having sips of fizzy drinks from about 6 months.

    Anyway I go to MIL's every sunday for dinner and when my nephew is having a treat I feel guilty saying no to my LO. And now my mum tends to by him a treat everytime she see's him a well as my sister (18 year old)

    So to get to the point my LO has developed a taste for sweets, and he is hyper as it is so it really doesn't help. He actually takes paddies for sweets and I have found he has been having a sweet or 2 everyday, and i'm beating myself up as he is becoming more and more fussy about eating, he even asks for sugar on his cereal in the morning and I just pretend to put it on.

    I don't allow him fizzy drinks, and he only has weak dilutely juice with his meals and inbetween only water and milk and still loves his fruit. But i feel like he relies to much on sweets now and my MIL literally plows him with sweets and when at my mothers he raids the biscuit tin. The first thing he does when going to my parents of MIL is head for kitchen on hunt for sweets.

    I want to wean him off them asap as I really don't like it but it's become a bad habit. If you have got this far, thank you.

    I just need advice as to how to encourage him to eat well again, he has totally gone of veg and gradually become a more fussy eater, but if I say no to sweets he goes wild, that's what worries me so much.

    Just any feeding tips, I can cook but my hubby is the main one in kitchen but since he has been working away for past 6 months I am struggling to get my head around feeding my LO.

    Please any advice, like meal ideas to get LO interested, recipes etc would be amazing. Anything that goes down with your toddler and that you can eat as well, i'm open to trying anything, just want to nip this in the bud now!!!

    I am so bloody ashamed :(
     
  2. dali

    dali Well-Known Member

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    i would start with just restricting the amount he eats , like when u are at MIL's or whereever and someone if trying to push sweets on him, be firm with them ( the MIL , not the sweets) tell her you dont like him eating so much and he is limited to ( dunno what she is giving him but as en example) 1 squar of choc, or 1 biscuit or whatever, if sends him hyper then all the more reason to restrict it more.
    also sugary snacks / drinks are best to have say after a meal in one go rather than him grazing on them throughout the afternoon ( from a tooth health stand point)

    dont feel ashamed, kids like sweets and it dosnt sound likeit was you that got him hooked on them anyway. i dont think it is neccesary to cut treats out all together, i think all things in moderation usually suits me. but if you want him off them altogether i would def start with cutting back p ont them first and restrict them to after dinner for example , rather than as a snack.

    for a fussy eater you could always try making soups ( you can hide stuff he wont normally eat in soup) ? i made a veg soup this week in bulk and froze portions too, ( sadly it didnt go down as well as i hoped but he did eat some ,and loved dipping the bread in it , talking of dipping bread soft boiled egg with soldiers always goes down well here , ( more of a lunch than dinner but eggs are sooo good for lo too )
     
  3. KarenLV

    KarenLV Well-Known Member

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    This will be difficult to do. I would reduce the amount of MIL visits temporarily as she seems to be a great influence over you and your son.She probably means well but you need someone that will support you in this which I doubt she will do.I would just continue diluting juices and slowly reducing treats.Thats all you can do after all.You would need to toughen up and not let others make you feel guilty when you know what is best for your little one. He is yours and your responsibility at the end of the day.Good luck!
     
  4. Danilou1910

    Danilou1910 Mammy to 1-Charlie

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    Thanks girls! We only go to MIL once a week on a sunday. But it's not just her its my mum too. I do try to be strict, but when my BIL is happy stuffing y nephew with crap from 6 months, i feel bad for my LO, saying no when his cousin is having it.

    My hubby is home for 2 weeks over xmas, so hopefully he can help the weaning process, as it will be the hardest over xmas with all the sweets going round. Its down to me tho, so i guess it's time ro get even more tough :)
     
  5. nievesmama

    nievesmama Proud mum of 3 xx

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    I agree with the others hun. Just gradually restrict his sweet intake and keep giving him the juice, and offer fruit each time he asks for treats.
    You shouldnt feel guilty at all, you only want whats best for your child xx
     
  6. divadexie

    divadexie Well-Known Member

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    My son's granny is the same!
    My son has real behavioural problems towards me when hes on sweeites too :(
    It got to a point he was always asking for a sweetie in any shop we went into, and every time he came back from hers he was on such a sugar down he was horrible!

    I told her that if she wanted him to stay with her then she needed to listen to my rules as it was making him horible at home, and I didn't want him getting fat or rotten teeth!

    I gave her a list of things he can eat, rice cakes, fruit, organic crisps, no added sugar juices, and he really does love his raisins. So far I think she has stuck to it as he hasn't been so bad coming home.

    I do let him have one sweet or small cake a week and he gets to pick it IF he has been good coming home from playgroup all week.
     
  7. Midnight_Fairy

    Midnight_Fairy New baby J

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    We had this wth my son. I tried replacing sweets with stickers etc and encouraging him to put stickers on chart when he has heathy snacks. Also explain about teeth and good bad things for teeth etc x
     
  8. faun

    faun Mum to 2 boys and 1 girl

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    If you started making your own cookies and cakes you can half the amount of sugar in the recipe and it still tastes great that way he can still have a treat but you are in control of how much sugar he is getting. If you have the time you could make some extra to take with you to mil's as everyone loves homemade biccies and cake. My 2 loved oatmeal cookies with a glass of milk as a sweet treat.
     
  9. Danilou1910

    Danilou1910 Mammy to 1-Charlie

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    How did you go about introducing a chart and what sort of rewards did you give him and after how many stickers? Just I am hoping to introduce a good behavior and eating chart after xmas for charlie but haven't got a clue where to start :shrug:

    I try to bake things with charlie, but it tends to be out of a box. So if you have any recipe ideas that you could pass onto me it would be hugely appreciated :thumbup:

    Thanks again for the replies so far :flower:
     
  10. Midnight_Fairy

    Midnight_Fairy New baby J

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    Hi, I brought the charts on ebay because I really didnt know where to start and I am not very creative. They have helped but I have since made my own for good behaviour just a basic chart and use cheap stickers or draw smiley faces in the spaces. If he gets 3 smiley faces a day then he gets his daily treat (which he normally choses 20/30mins on play station)

    This might also help :)

    https://www.supernanny.co.uk/Advice...ine-and-Reward/The-Placemat-Reward-Chart.aspx
     
  11. chocolate

    chocolate Well-Known Member

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    Hi, Im so glad I read this as it has opened my eyes to our diet and my sons diet.
    When he was a baby I said no to the sugary things, my oh's Nan wanted to give him sips of juice from 4 months and chocolate buttons at 6 months and finally wore me down when he was about a year, and now he has chocolate or cake on a daily basis. He has alsways been fussy with veg. and used to love fruit but recently has gone off this, think down to an illness.

    So after Christmas, I am going to say to the in-laws that our new years resolution is to improve all our diets before baby 2 comes along. And that they can bring grapes, a banana or stickers as a treat instead of chocolate every visit as quite often he will have 3 visits in one weekend plus stuff he has in the week with me!
    Im the biggest problem - I have a huge sweet tooth so always have cake or chocolate when out and in the evenings etc. So Im going to have to change too!


    Does anyone have some good snack suggestions?

    I was thinking about going back to doing some fruit puree's that he could have with plain yoghurt or just on its own.
    He loves banana's so thats ok, but he has gone a bit picky with fruit, but sure once I eliminate chocolates he will enjoy fruit again.
    Maybe replace crisps with breadsticks and cheese.


    My ds is 18 months so I want to do it before he can ask for it!!


    I wish you luck, let me know how you go! Im planning on one sweet pudding/treat a week, maybe applie pie and custard or something after a Sunday roast - I dont mind him having something like that 2 or 3 times a week, as long as he doesnt start begging for it!
     

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