Next baby?

shortie1990

Mummy to two under 2 :)
Joined
Sep 16, 2009
Messages
5,951
Reaction score
0
Just something my Grandma got me thinking about really..
My uncle and his wife(her son) had a lovely baby boy Jan 09, and are expecting their second child in November. they are in their late 30's (my uncles 38)

They are married, and he has a good career, and she's just given up her career to become a full time mother

anyway, I'll get to the point, basically, my Grandma thinks that they are being selfish for having another baby so soon, as their son will have split attention etc.

What are your oppinions?
I'm 20, OH is 25, and (obviously will have to see how this LO goes etc) But I'd like my little boy to have a brother/sister, with not too much of an age gap, so he can learn sharing, and have some one to play with etc.

I have three siblings, my sister is 21(22in sept), me at 20, my brother 17(18in sept) and there's my youngest sister who has just turned 9, and with no dissrespect to my mother, she is so spoilt, she's selfish, there's no one for her to play with, so she's always inside on her laptop/watching tv...thats no childhood for a 9 year old, she needs to be out playing with friends, and because of this, I wouldnt want my son to be so isolated.

So basically (sorry for waffling!) What are your thoughts? What age gaps are between your children? Or how long are you wanting to wait before baby No.2 comes along?

(thanks for reading! haha)
 
There is 18 months between my boys so doing the math I got pregnant twice when my babies were 9 months old :wacko:.

I love the fact that my boys are so close in age and I don't find it difficult to split my attention between them as we do everything together, like stories and games etc. They have such a wonderful bond and I'm very proud of how they have learnt to share with each other :cloud9:.

xx
 
i actually think about this a lot. i know i wouldn't want this child to be an only child, but my brothers and i had 3 years between us and we all fought like cat and dog (although we get on well now we're older)! my boyfriend's mum had 7 years between her 3 children and that gap is much bigger than he would like for his children, as the relationship he has with his brothers is more like a guardian - particularly as his younger brother is 14 years younger than him.

in an ideal world i think maybe a very small age gap is a good thing, as friends with siblings close together are very close, but i do worry that you won't get to give each child the attention you could if the gap was bigger. but then again children only know what they experience so would they ever really feel like they had missed out on anything?!

unfortunately for us our circumstances are dictating that we couldn't possibly have another for at least 4 years, and this scares me a bit, but such is life!

i guess i can see pros and cons with any size gap, sorry for rambling! xx
 
There is 18 months between my boys so doing the math I got pregnant twice when my babies were 9 months old :wacko:.

I love the fact that my boys are so close in age and I don't find it difficult to split my attention between them as we do everything together, like stories and games etc. They have such a wonderful bond and I'm very proud of how they have learnt to share with each other :cloud9:.

xx

exactly my reasons for wanting another, my mum keeps telling me just to see how this one is first, but still, i dont want him to be on his own! lol x
 
I am 19 & OH is 27 & this is our first child.
I would ideally like to have two more, the next one in a couple years and then the third in about 10 years.
I have no idea why, just love the idea!
OH isn't majorly keen on more children though, so will have to see how things go :thumbup:

Also, my friend (well she's more my sisters' friend) she is 21 (I think!) and maried and has a girl who is 2 in October, a 7 month old & she's pregnant with her third!
It's totally her decision and all three were planned but I personally would of waited longer and the second.

xxx
 
there will be 2 years 1 month between my girls , its just perfect to me.

i really wanted 2 girls and to have 2 years between them , i hope they will be like best friends & look after each other. :)
 
i want there to be not a huge age gap between my kids so that they will always have some one to play with that is around there age any way...
 
I want my babies as close together as my body can stand lol.

There was an 8 year age gap between me and my brother, to the point where I call myself an only child.
 
I have 18 months exactly between me and my brother (I am 27 in October and he will be 26 next March), then there is 30 months between him and our next brother who will be 23 in September. I got on best with me youngest brother growing up (there is 3y11m between us) but got on really well with both of them, save the odd bit of bickering. As we got older, I started to get on best with the brother I am closest in age to. However, even my youngest brother is not very far apart in age from me.

I think small gaps certainly teach sharing and also mean children grow up with friends that will, hopefully, stay with them for life and be their best link to their past. For me, the prospect of an age gap of >4 years between children is not a nice one as by that stage Isabella will be at nursery at least full time and will be going to school in the September so I won't really want to go back to newborn stage then I don't think. I'd rather my children grew up together iyswim.

Having said that, I'd like her to be walking, starting to talk, on solids properly, starting to think about being fully toilet trained, before my next one is born. So we are TTC in Jan and if we fall first month again then there will be an 18m gap. I don't think that is selfish - any newborn will always have to share you whenever they are born! If it IS selfish then it is no more so than having a 10 year age gap where the chn will live separate lives!
 
i think we'll wait until this baby's 2 before we start trying again. though with it taking me so long to conceive this time round, she could potentially be 3 1/2 before i get pregnant again (maybe even older). i'd like between 2-3 years between babies, so we may try sooner, we'll see.
i'm also aware, not so much that my age is an issue (i'm 28, almost 29), but oh is almost 36 & probably won't want to be 40+ when we have a second child.
we both agree we'd like 2 children.
xx
 
I think my age is more relevant than the age gap between my babies.... It's my 35th Birthday today... this is my 1st baby and I know I definately want more than one as I grew up in a busy house.... I have 2 older sisters 9yr and 6yr age gap from me and I have a twin brother... tbh my sisters were more like aunties growing up due to the age gap but we are very close now...

I would like to wait until this baby is at least 1yr before 'trying' again but wouldn't be disappointed if fate took over...

xx
 
theres 7years between me and my sister, my mum had a miscarriage about 3 1/2 years after my sister was born so there would have been about 3 and a bit between us all.
It's the same with my partner as his brothers, there is 3years between them all...

I think 2-3 is what we are roughly going to aim for, but it will happen when it happens.
 
I think my age is more relevant than the age gap between my babies.... It's my 35th Birthday today... this is my 1st baby and I know I definately want more than one as I grew up in a busy house.... I have 2 older sisters 9yr and 6yr age gap from me and I have a twin brother... tbh my sisters were more like aunties growing up due to the age gap but we are very close now...

I would like to wait until this baby is at least 1yr before 'trying' again but wouldn't be disappointed if fate took over...

xx

Happy Birthday hun :happydance::cake::yipee::juggle::loopy::bunny:
 
there will be 2 years between my 2 kids. And that's roughly what I was aiming for. I have 2 brothers and we are all very close in age, there is basically a year between all of us (well 2 between me and the youngest brother!) We grew up really close and are fairly close now that we are older as well.
 
my friend has a 4yr old and a 14 weeks old and its lovely seeing her BIG sister help out and make a fuss of her......

on the other hand.....

my 2 are 22 months apart and i have a 3rd due with 24 months difference between her and my daughter....... i must be very selfish then eh lol..... x

i always wanted my children close in age... they can grow up together :)

x
 
I think my age is more relevant than the age gap between my babies.... It's my 35th Birthday today... this is my 1st baby and I know I definately want more than one as I grew up in a busy house.... I have 2 older sisters 9yr and 6yr age gap from me and I have a twin brother... tbh my sisters were more like aunties growing up due to the age gap but we are very close now...

I would like to wait until this baby is at least 1yr before 'trying' again but wouldn't be disappointed if fate took over...

xx

Happy Birthday hun :happydance::cake::yipee::juggle::loopy::bunny:



Thanks sweetie.... would be nice if baby came today? :thumbup:
 
I ideally want at least 4 years in between them...this pregnancy was soo physically draining on me I don't know how I could do it with a toddler at my hip! But with that being said, that would put Haley in kindergarten so while she's gone during the day there's that one on one bonding with the new baby so neither child would feel left out...I don't know...thats just my thinking...
 
Me and my OH have talked about this and ideally we'll wait 2 1/2 to 3 years. Saying that, it'll all depend on circumstances and finances etc xx
 
Hubby and I are planning to start trying again next summer. We'd really like our children to be about 2 years apart or so.
 
There is 2.5 years between my son(4 nearly) and daughter (17 months)and they get on great, i love seeing them play together, its lovely company for them and there will be 18 months between my daughter and this one xxxxxxxxx
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

Forum statistics

Threads
1,650,300
Messages
27,144,639
Members
255,755
Latest member
nunocmota.nc
Back
Top
monitoring_string = "c48fb0faa520c8dfff8c4deab485d3d2"
<-- Admiral -->