NO labido???

Discussion in 'Waiting To Try' started by cinnamum, Apr 22, 2009.

  1. cinnamum

    cinnamum Mumof_6_PREG W#7

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    :hugs:



    now i am all healed from a very traumatic birth (forceps and episotomy) i have noticed, where there has been hardly any sexual activity between my fiance and i, my labido has packed its bags and headed to god knows where.

    deep down i do wanna DO IT! i just dont get excited as fast as i used to, which puts me off, even though sex IS more enjoyable now than before childbirth.
    its like i need almost an hour of foreplay before i even feel ready to DO IT! :cry:
    i find this embarassing and i am worried that TTC will feel like a job more than being seen as fun and a way of sharing love with my partner etc.

    i am so confused, does anyone else feel differently about sex now they're a mummy?
    or... a mummy to-be?
    or... TTC in the next year?

    BTW i have been seen by a doctor x x x x :blush:
     
  2. Pops

    Pops Proud Mum & Wifey

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    :hugs: sorry you are going through this hun.

    I am incredibly lucky in this respect, as I am with every aspect of our relationship, and we have very similar sex drives and both enjoy it very much. 2 years in, we still have really great sex 4 or 5 times a week and if I am totally honest, that is the biggest worry that I have about having a baby, that we will have it less. I know that sounds terrible but it is such a big part of us and our relationship and it just wouldn't feel right not to do it as often as we always have.

    Have you thought about getting some nice lubricants and incorporating them into the fun from the very start? Durex Play do a great massage oil which doubles up as a lube and it is by far the best we have tried.

    xxx
     
  3. cinnamum

    cinnamum Mumof_6_PREG W#7

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    yeah have tried lubes and stuff, durex play stuff is great, but still takes an hour to get warmed up.
    like i said... sex is better but it just takes alot longer for me to want it. it must be frustrating for OH x x x x

    hope i havent caused you any worry x x x
     
  4. tasha41

    tasha41 Mum & Dad + 1

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    Are you on birth control at all? That can definitely have an effect on your sex drive.
     
  5. cinnamum

    cinnamum Mumof_6_PREG W#7

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    no, no birth control.
    i am even taking jensing. (if thats how its spelt)
    and i am taking multivitamins which have zinc and stuff for helping labido.
     
  6. toffee87

    toffee87 Well-Known Member

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    I have whacky hormones and a low libido, perhaps it's just going to take time after having your little girl.
     
  7. lozzy21

    lozzy21 Mummy to Niamh

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    Try doing romantic stuff before the forplay, a glass of wine, a massage. Aparently the best way to increase your sex drive is to have more sex.
     
  8. Berniep

    Berniep Well-Known Member

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    I felt like this after having both of my kids and still do from time to time sometimes by the time i'm turned on enough to do it hubby is almost asleep and too tired its so frustrating, your not alone its hard work bringing up a baby not everyone is lucky enough for their sex life not to suffer, try not to worry hopefully this stage in your life will pass by very soon x
     
  9. pinkmummy

    pinkmummy Guest

    I understand exactly where you are coming from hun. I am exactly the same :(

    I would happily never have sex again. I never had a traumatic birth in fact my birth was relaxing and amazing, but for some reason my sex rive has just disappeared.

    We have tried everything to get it back, i.e. foreplay massage etc but nothing seems to work, I just can't be bothered.

    I think with me it is more to do with being tired from looking after two kids and a house all day. Im usually asleep by 8.30pm :blush:

    Hope you manage to find a solution xxx
     
  10. cinnamum

    cinnamum Mumof_6_PREG W#7

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    wow! you dont know how good it is to hear, i am not alone x x x x cheers laydeeeeez x x x x
     
  11. lilmissmup

    lilmissmup Mummy to Maddie

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    My sex drive is very low, I went on the injection for 5 years and it disappeared, the injection made it very hard for me to get wet enough and sex was painful which probably didn't help.

    I am on the pill and the dryness problem is going but still crappy sex drive. I would love to enhance it.
     

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