Not been here for years

[mrs whitehead]

Hi, iv not been here since we had our little girl. She's going to be 3 in just under a month. We are in the process of wtt. I'm excited and nervous. I want our daughter to have a sibling, she loves babies and wants to be a big sister. But a couple of months after having her I noticed my moods were becoming very up and down, mostly down. I was snappy, short tempered, lost interest in a lot of things, attention was rubbish, I stopped eating. My grandad died, my mum had major surgery and I had to go back to work early and work full time. My mum was going to be my daughter career while I was in work but couldn't because of her operation. I was bullied and unsupported when I went back to work. After 2 months of being back I was signed off with depression. I had been suffering silently with it for nearly 1 year. Not even my husband knew because I had hidden it. I felt like if let everyone down by admitting I was depressed. I have since had councelling, been on meds and come off then successfully and back in work. But the last 5-6 months have been a struggle again. Stress I'm work has made my moods worse and my managers management of my depression also made it worse and I'm now off again. I'm a better when surrounded by my family. I'm turning 30 in September so we have decided to ttc after my birthday. But I'm just anxious that my depression will get worse. And it's taking away some of the excitement of ttc again.

 

[Caite]

It sounds like you had a pretty tough time around your DD's delivery, and as though you were reluctant to admit to what you were going through. Perhaps this time, you will cope better with it as you won't have other things going on in your life (like your granddad dying and your mum having surgery). Since then, you've learnt to accept help, and this time, if you did develop the same symptoms, hopefully you would be better able to spot them and recognise there was a problem, and more willing to accept help.

I'm sorry your manager hasn't been very supportive. Could you look in to moving jobs? Or transferring to another team/department/area, if that's something you can do in your work?

Good luck for when you start TTC.

 

[RaspberryK]

Awww no sounds like an awful time, I've felt like I've had a crappy time since ds was born too.
Can you get some more counselling?
Any way you can change jobs/department/hours?
Dd will get free nursery for 15 hours as of September I presume? That might help financially with cutting hours?
I come on b n b as kind of escapism from my life as to be quite honest I'm bored.
Xx