Not feeling my midwife is competent...

[summer rain]

Hi

I'm booked for a homebirth but I've only seen my specific local midwife once at 28 weeks (had a different one of her team for booking appointment; and then different ones at hospital for 16 week appointment etc) and I couldn't make it to my 34 week appointment as the time wasn't suitable and she wasn't able to offer me anything else. I phoned her less than four days later and she asked the same qs she asks every time; I know shes probably dealing with a lot of patients but she asked me first off if I'd had my baby; then she forgot what hospital I am booked at, or that I am booked for a homebirth. She then mumbled vaguely about how they can get the homebirth sorted for me; but I'm just not feeling confident. It seems these midwives don't deal with homebirths despite my GP booking me in with this team of midwives specifically because they do; whereas my GP said the other team of midwives in the area only deal with a specific hospital and don't do homebirths. Also I want to discuss whether I'd be able to have a homebirth here; should we not be moved yet (we're going through a homeswap atm) because this development does have restricted parking and no visitor parking at all; as well as it being down quite a long private road; and thus the midwives may have to park further away than they are comfortable with. Also at my last ante natal appointment I had to wait 2 hours, the mw turned up really late and was running around like a headles chicken; which wasn't explained; and by the end of it I felt really anxious; and then the appointment was so rushed I wasn't able to do anything except get my HIP form filled, blood pressure checked, and fundal height/heartbeat. In my old area it was the same NHS trust and a completely different system, they had a team of midwives and while you didn't see the same one each time; appointments were always on time and not rushed, and rebooking was easy. My OH is really supportive of homebirth but he is now saying he doesn't feel confident either and he is thinking we should just go to the nearest hospital (not the one I've been with) as its between 5-20 mins drive away if traffic is ok. Just not sure what to do....

 

[Farie]

I'd call up and ask t speak to someone, if they fob you off with 'busy etc' ask to be called back. Explain you want to discuss all your options, need a home visit booked in due to the location of the new house etc. I'd also add that you were very unhappy at your last appt and with the phone call you had before.

See what they say, you might get a great response and a better m/w or just more reassurance?

 

[Mervs Mum]

You can change MWs but I think I'd go with Farie's suggestion in the first instance. Be strong and insistent. I think the system sometimes forgets that while they may see this every day of the week, your baby will only be born ONCE and it's important to you that it feels well thought out and properly planned. MWs are under huge pressure with ridiculous case loads but you should still feel happy and confident with the care you are receiving x

 

[summer rain]

I find speaking on the phone difficult so I am going to go to my appointment on Wednesday, its a different midwife from the same team because my midwife is going on holiday and have it out with her, politely of course. I just about managed to book this appointment as the midwife was being so inflexible, and I will be exactly 36 weeks by then. I only live around the corner from the clinic but they are not based there, I actually don't have a clue where they are based or anything and I just have the phone number of my midwife and not of wherever they are based or any of the others on the team. I am really not happy with the team so far as the booking midwife was really horrible and put me as high risk for no real reason and told me I'd have to see a consultant for three different things (my weight, past depression and the fact I'd had a bigger baby), I looked at their risk assessment form and I didn't anywhere near meet the criteria for what they were saying. I am well under the BMI they consider to be a risk; I haven't been on any anti-depressants for 2 years, and my biggest son was more than a few oz under what they consider to be Macrosomia (sp?). Also those factors were still there when I had my youngest; and when I was pregnant last year (ended in miscarriage) and I wasn't classed as high risk then, the mws in my old area just seemed to have more common sense. When I had my 16 week appointment this time even the mw based at the hospital said it was completely ridiculous and scribbled all of that out and cancelled the consultant appointments. I think because of that and because I already have three kids they think they can leave me to my own devices this time.