Not going to my weekly appointment today

[jlw617]

So last week I had my 35 week appointment and they did my gbs swab and it was the last of the midwives I had to meet, so far I've loved all the midwives and I even liked this last one but something she did made me mad...before I start, let me preface by saying I'm not looking for people to give me advice per say and I don't mean it rudely but I'll explain why after I explain what happened. So the appointment went well, I was 70% effaced and 1-2 cm dilated! Baby's heartbeat was great and he's still very active, he's in position although he is back to back, little stinker! Well at the end she asked me if I had been having routine growth scans and I told her no because though I have GD, I have been more than controlling my numbers and this last appointment was the very first in my entire pregnancy where I had actually gained some weight, 2 lbs (up until that point I had lost 20 and hadn't gained any of it back yet) so obviously my weight had also been great...my main midwife was/is more than fine with me not getting any growth scans and I'm personally against them for the most part as I know how inaccurate they can be with a known difference of up to 2lbs...I don't want the extra ultrasound exposure and I also don't want them to be off and want to suddenly take additional measures based off what they think they find...I.e., csection or induction because "baby is too big" I've never had GD in previous pregnancies but with my lack of weight gain, numbers staying in control and previous "smaller babies" I'm not likely to have a large baby and even if I did which I strongly doubt, I have friends that are just as petite as me that have birthed 10lb babies...any how she also ordered an nst and though it's not invasive, it made me mad because she didn't tell me she ordered the test, I found out through the billing department she had no reason to order such a test and if she did she did not communicate it with me...I've had no complications (yes I know the GD is considered a "complication" but even with that, I've done a great job keeping it under control, so needless to say with her ordering tests that are unnecessary and finding out my insurance won't cover them anyways, plus it would be an ob, not a midwife (I have nothing against obs, in fact my first 2 pregnancies were under the care of obs, I just prefer more natural care this time) I just cancelled, I'm due any day and it's not like they do anything in these last appointments besides ask how I'm doing, check my Bp and urine which have been perfect every time so I'm totally fine with missing it. Thanks for reading my novel I just needed to vent.

 

[Emmymommy]

You do you, mama! That's frustrating that she would order tests without discussion, especially if she isn't your primary care provider. I know you said no advice but if I were in your shoes I'd probably call up my main midwife for some answers (hopefully that's in the realm of ok advice to receive!) The whole care model here with midwives is based on informed choice and open dialogue between mother and midwife, so I would be frustrated to feel I wasn't an active participant in my care, as you are!

 

[jlw617]

You do you, mama! That's frustrating that she would order tests without discussion, especially if she isn't your primary care provider. I know you said no advice but if I were in your shoes I'd probably call up my main midwife for some answers (hopefully that's in the realm of ok advice to receive!) The whole care model here with midwives is based on informed choice and open dialogue between mother and midwife, so I would be frustrated to feel I wasn't an active participant in my care, as you are!

Haha no you're totally fine I just didn't want to hear things like "well you do have GD so blah blah blah" know what I mean? Sympathy is appreciated and you hit the nail on the head with the open dialogue, which I've had so far, the midwives all seem to work on the same team so to speak so I don't think calling would help but I'm not too concerned about it, just annoyed she would do that, she's the only one that's done something like that, which is a shame because I liked/like her besides her doing that and it makes me question if she'd respect my wishes during labor/delivery if she happened to be the one on call when I go in.

 

[Nerdy]

Woooow. What a cow! I'd be pretty irritated with someone ordering tests without my permission or knowledge as well!

 

[Mushymilkfor2]

I know exactly how annoying that is! It seems every doctor I've encountered at my new hospital has a problem with explaining what they're doing or why. I was marked high risk without even being informed, even though when confronted with questions they could only say it's just a technical term and I'm not really high risk. Was ordered an early GD test and ended up giving 6 vials of blood for multiple tests despite only being informed of one. They are having me do a growth scan due to a previous large baby, but I'd love to see them try to induce me early cause that ain't happening!

 

[jlw617]

I know exactly how annoying that is! It seems every doctor I've encountered at my new hospital has a problem with explaining what they're doing or why. I was marked high risk without even being informed, even though when confronted with questions they could only say it's just a technical term and I'm not really high risk. Was ordered an early GD test and ended up giving 6 vials of blood for multiple tests despite only being informed of one. They are having me do a growth scan due to a previous large baby, but I'd love to see them try to induce me early cause that ain't happening!

That would make me mad too especially since I have terrible veins, they did actually do something similar to me as well but in a way I guess it was good...she tested me for GD very early through a blood test without telling me, and I know she did it solely based off of weight but I'm not huge and I also have never had it, the only difference this time around is that I'm in my 30s vs my 20s with my other 2, needless to say, I don't see that midwife anymore and she won't be delivering me as I'm delivering at a hospital she doesn't deliver at. And I feel you on the induction, glad you have your mind made up, my husband is my rock and he's not going to let anything fly this time that we have decided against unless it's medically necessary.

 

[stormcloud96]

Wow ordering a test without your knowledge or discussion, that's terrible. My sister had GD with her first, and I have it with mine. We both think it tends to be over-diagnosed. They tried to get me to be concerned about it, but honestly since I am high risk for premature, I kind of want my bub to be bigger... I think moms know best

 

[Iren_iren]

Why on earth did she think you would go for that test? Not telling anything to you is not good.
Would you see her again in a week or two? You've been doing great job with GD and hope your baby will make an appearance soon

 

[LockandKey]

ugh I feel like that just defeats the whole purpose of what midwife care is supposed to represent. The reason I switched from OB care with my first to midwife care with my 2nd and 3rd was specifically because I hated the way OB's went about things in a manner similar to what you've just outlined, and communicating amongst themselves, but left me completely in the dark without even consulting me first.

I feel your frustration, I'd be frustrated too, and personally if it were me, I'd call for a "what gives?" chat.

 

[jlw617]

Thanks ladies, like I said so far all the other ones have been great so hopefully I just won't have to have her be the one that's on call that day, and nope I won't have to see her anymore as I have a "primary midwife" that I'll continue to see for the duration of my pregnancy which at this point will only be one more time, if that haha. As far as the GD is concerned, thanks iren, I won't lie, it's been hard work to not be able to indulge when I'd like to but it's important to me to maintain a strict diet so I won't have to go on meds, I agree stormcloud, not that's it's over diagnosed per say (to me it's either you have it or you don't) but I do feel that it's not treated in a way where women can even manage it...the amount of carbs they reccomend you consume is insane to me and no one who ate that amount of carbs could manage it with diet alone but I've done my research and feel totally safe being on a low carb high protein, high fat diet. And I do feel that there's a lot of extra unnecessary testing that goes along with it which of course then can lead to other unnecessaries like induction/csection, I am with you on the bigger baby thing as well as both my girls were early and on the small side, I wouldn't mind having a baby that's a little bigger this time

 

[gits87]

I'd be really annoyed that these tests were ordered without having an open discussion with you. You and the baby are the most important.

I'm glad you wont have to see her again.

Good luck with everything