not on the count down to christmas, on the count down until MIL LEAVES!!!

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by sparkle_1979, Dec 22, 2009.

  1. sparkle_1979

    sparkle_1979 Mum to Ruby born Oct 2009

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    SERIOUSLY I did not want to do a MIL rant but arrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

    I really don't know how I'm going to survive another week with this woman, Im sure her purpose is to see how far she can push me. Im usually a really chilled out person and just laugh at her because she is sooooo rude it's actually funny, but since having the little one my hormones seem to be slightly temperamental!!!!:wacko:

    Usually my house is spotless, but since having Ruby it is a little bit untidy, but by no means is my house dirty, I just dont see the point in worrying about a few magazines and cushions ect out of place. she keeps picking at me, for example if I hear her say to ruby one more time " come on lets go and look at the cobwebs" I will not be responsible for my actions!!! she is constant with little comments.....
    Also she has been nosing around my dressing room as she said " hmmm really you should look up what wardrobes are used for" I have 2 tops and a few dressed hanging out ( and the odd thing chucked on the floor ) IT'S MY BLOODY ROOM SO WHO CARES )
    Then yesterday she came back how clean is your house book!!!!:nope: WTF!!!

    BUT the main this that is reallllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy bloody pissed me off is that she keeps calling Ruby "Ruby Grace" ( Grace is her middle name ) Now I only agreed on Grace as I thought its a middle name and who really uses their middle name. I gave in on it as it was not a name I'd have chosen, but hubby and I battled so much over the 1st name when it come to the second name I just thought, choose what you want because it wont be used.... NOW SHE CALLS HER ruby grace EVERY TIME, even when shopping and people ask her name "it's Ruby Grace" I have explained to her that she is my daughter and she is to be called Ruby and that I don't really like " ruby grace" but she just said she's her grand daughter and she will call her what she likes............

    Oh and just to top it off she keeps staring at me, I know she thinks I've let myself go because I dont wake up and put a full face of makeup on and do my hair like I used to....Seriously I catch her staring at me looking down her nose....Bitch!! Who cares, I make an effort when I go out, but I have a baby now and spending time with her playing is more important than sitting doing my makeup!!! grrrrrr
     
  2. jennie_78

    jennie_78 Mum to Caitlin, and TTC

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    How long is she staying for ?

    maybe instead of giving her petty comments she should help out with the housework.
    I dont do as much housework anymore, and my living room looks a bit cluttered these days with baby bits. Its impossible to keep it immaculate.
    As for your dressing room, why does she need to nose in there ?

    Using the full name would annoy me aswell, and i think shes out of order saying shes her granddaughter and she'll call her what she wants. She's your child and the mil should call her the same as what you do.

    Sorry i havent got any advice to give you, hope it goes fast til she buggers off. Maybe just let it go in one ear and out the other? :hugs:
     
  3. pip holder

    pip holder Well-Known Member

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    :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

    Oh God I'm so sympathetic on this, mine isn't even bloody coming til thursday and I'm already twitching :wacko:

    The best piece of advice I was given can offer is to remember that although to you she is just a naggy auld interfering bint -she probably sees you as her actual daughter now and therefore can legitimately moan at you.
    Ruby will soon know her name properly and start telling you MIL to stop adding Grace in. When she stares at you - ask her in a super polite way if you have a bogey on your face :haha:

    Once I had that revelation about my MIL I felt much less victimised by her and realised that she sees me as as useless little kid!

    Me and my mum both agree that my MIL doesn't realise just how rude/irritating/twa*ty/annoying/malicious she is being and would (hopefully) be horrified if she knew how upset she makes me sometimes.

    Also - unless you have to see her every day - try and breathe deeply and ignore her :ignore:-
    my mantra for the holiday period?
    This too shall pass
    :hugs:
     
  4. AP

    AP Well-Known Member
    Moderator

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    is her name on the birth certificate? no.
    Did she concieve and carry and give birth to this child? no?

    Why do MILs think they have as much authority and rights as the mother?

    Yes, thy are the grandparent. Thats it. Not their child, not anything but a grandchild!

    i bloody hate em!
     
  5. mummytobe

    mummytobe 2 little girls

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    :hugs:

    I thought my MIL was bad ! xx
     
  6. sparkle_1979

    sparkle_1979 Mum to Ruby born Oct 2009

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    Seriously she is really quite awful and is worse when drinking.

    It did come to a head the other day when she started giving me marital advise....I just said "Excuse me but you are married and stay married to a wife beating transvestite, so I dont think I'll be taking advise from you" Thats a whole other story ( she decided to tell us at the breakfast table that her husband likes to dress in her clothes sometimes and be called Andrea, not Andrew" ) oh and then the cheeky bitch said he has a wig, thats rather like my hair!!!!!! cow....
     
  7. Connah'sMommy

    Connah'sMommy Well-Known Member

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    Dont we all just love our MILs:haha:
    I can sympathise hun! My MIL is an absolute nightmare and i for one dont think i could cope with my MIL staying for longer than a few hours!

    Unfortunately for me she only lives 5 minutes away:dohh:

    i know its easier said than done but try not to let her get to you,if she sees she is annoying you she will do it even morexxx
     
  8. sparkle_1979

    sparkle_1979 Mum to Ruby born Oct 2009

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    you are right the more she knows she is winding me up the more she does it. hubby is good though and does tell her to button it.......
     
  9. rubywoo77

    rubywoo77 Mum of 2

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    Gosh you have my sympathies, just think she won't be at yours for long and then you don't have to see her for a while. When ever she says owt just b r e a t h e and count to ten - it works for me (well, sometimes!).

    I hope your OH doesn't let her speak down to you and sticks up for you if she says owt in front of him. In MIL situations I have found they are more likely to respect the wife/partner if they know that their son won't let them get away with it and that if they carried on they could potentially cause probs with their relationship with their son/s - that normally shuts them up pretty quick.

    although mine isn't coming to stay she only lives 5 mins away so we have to see her lot more often than I would like to.
     
  10. Mum2b_Claire

    Mum2b_Claire Mummy to Ruby & Scarlett!

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    Grrrr! How very stupid that your MIL makes comments about the cleanliness of your house but doesn't do any cleaning. My mum makes a few comments about my house, but she just gets cleaning herself.
    I like my MIL but her husband...noooo. They're not coming until the 29th though. I have decided to ignore him if he makes comments, which he will. The last time I saw him Ruby was less than 2 weeks old and he just kept making stupid tutting noises at things I said/did which left me wanting to smack him.
     
  11. Bingers

    Bingers Well-Known Member

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    Why do MIL's have to be so awful!

    Mine is an absolute pain and had a go at us when she visited becasue we did not wake our daughter so she could hold her. We do not wake her for anybody! She constantly refers to her as MY grandughter etc. I could say more but it will only wind me up writing it!

    I feel so sorry for you having to have your MIL to stay and agree with others re politely answering her back when she is rude to you!
     
  12. Rachel_C

    Rachel_C Well-Known Member

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    In your situation, I think I'd be tempted to do some sneaky untidying of wherever she's sleeping (spare room?)... some fluff on her pillow, some nice gritty dirt on the floor etc. I'm such a child but I'd be like 'You wanna complain? I'll give you something to complain about!'.

    The name thing would really annoy me too. If I dared, I'd probably keep calling her the wrong name then say 'You're MY mother-in-law so I'll call you what I want'. Either that or tell her that you're going to legally change your child's name to Bob if she doesn't stop it!
     
  13. mum2b2009

    mum2b2009 mummy of two boys!

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    I know how u feel! my mil winds me up to. she thinks i stole her sun even tho she lives 5 mins away and sees him every day! she has a lot of jelousy issues. always telling me that her dog hates me cause my oh dosent live there anymore! crazy. i just laugh to myself. keep telling youself she wont be there 4 much longer. x
     
  14. mum2b2009

    mum2b2009 mummy of two boys!

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    my mil calls me by the wrong name aswell,so rude.
     
  15. leeanne

    leeanne Mom of 3 and Stepmom of 2

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    LMAO!!!!! And she's giving you marital advice? OMG!

    And about the house cleaning. My mom came down for my daughter's birth, she was unwell and had a very sore back which she had surgery for, and she cleaned and cleaned my house like mad. I told her to relax but she didn't. So perhaps your MIL should help out instead of putting her nose down on you.

    Hope she's leaving soon and you can say "Don't let the door hit you on the way out."
     
  16. Babydance

    Babydance Well-Known Member

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    lol sorry but next time she says "lets go looks at the cobwebs" say "oh thanks heres the duster ive been meaning to get them" :rofl: her face would be a picture!
    I hope she doesnt ruin your Christmas hun try and enjoy it as much as you can! Does DH know how you feel? xxx
     
  17. beancounter

    beancounter Well-Known Member

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    If she was talking to the baby about cobwebs I would probably accidentally leave the baby monitor on, leave the handset near her and then sing baby a lullaby about how We're moving to New Zealand unless granny gets off my damn back.

    I am not terribly diplomatic. But my MIL is nice to me.
     
  18. flower01

    flower01 Expecting Baby 3!!

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    omg i know how annoying it is with the name thing
    i got cards that said Willow Ann.

    it drives me mad
    shes willow not willow ann.

    grrrrrr
    least no one has called her it face to face mind
     
  19. princess_bump

    princess_bump Happy Wife & Mumma!

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    :shock: i think i may have thrown her out by now! your a saint!! i really feel for you honey, perhaps remind her more often YOUR ruby's mum, and you shall do as you wish!

    hope you goes home soon :hugs: xx
     
  20. sparkle_1979

    sparkle_1979 Mum to Ruby born Oct 2009

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    Thanks everyone, glad to know Im not alone. Even sitting here now she is on at me about my hair, saying"hmmm pregnancy really takes all the goodness out of your hair doesnt it" I hate her....oh well 7 more nights!!

    The worse thing is we are bloody snowed in together, not like I can go see a friend :(
     

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