Not so much gender disappointment, just fear...

[saraaa]

Hi all, Saturday 4th I find out what our baby will be, I always said I wanted a boy first so my kids would have an older brother, but now the fear of it being a boy then all my children being boys scares the hell out of me, I really want a daughter someone to share things with, my oh doesn't really seen to understand it because he doesn't have a preference.
I think it's the phrase "a daughter is a daughter for life, a son is a son until he meets his wife" that makes the fear worse because its true, a girl always goes to her mother whereas a son will always be with his wife's mother and when they have children they'll spend all their time with the wife's parents and family. I'm sure it's just hormones and my mind going into over drive, but I have to keep looking at baby boys clothes trying to convince myself it'll all be fine and ill be happy! Good luck with your pregnancies ladies xx

 

[Louise88]

Aww bless you Hun I think what your feeling is normal. My oh is very close to his mum in fact we spend a lot of time with her more then we do my mum! Lol and his sister never sees their mum so it's been the opposite for my MIL her sons been for life and her daughters been her daughter until she met her oh lol

My oh really wanted a boy first but we got our daughter first instead then our son, I really wanted one of each and had severe gender disappointment thinking I'd have a 2nd girl when I found out I was having a boy of course I was ecstatic it's what I wanted but then I started mourning over the thought that my daughter would never have a sister to play with or be close to and I got upset over it so I ended up being disappointed either way lol

 

[Misscalais]

I don't believe in that those sayings at all.
You just gotta hope your sons ( if you have them ) pick good wives that aren't control freaks and run their lives lol!
I am having son #3 so I understand where you are coming from.
If you make yourself a good mum in law then your daughter in law will feel more comfortable being around you etc. My mil is a bitch but my step mil is awesome and my boys absolutely love her and my fil. I've even thought about asking step mil to come to the birth where as I haven't asked my mum even though I'm extremely close with my mum. ( she hasn't been to any of my births either )
Anyway I'm sad about all the things ill miss out on now I'm never going to have a daughter but will be praying for wonderful daughter in laws when the time comes.
It's hard, I hope you get sons and daughters

 

[MonyMony]

I think that saying is highly outdated. Many moms and daughters completely clash, or even compete. Also, it's very cultural. In some countries the young couple and their children actually live with their father's extended family, so a daughter is the one who goes away as soon as she's married. There are many factors that affect how close you will be to your children. If you're not controlling, they will want to share their lives with you always!

My husband is extremely close to his parents, and while I am with mine too, they are geographically very far away so my kids know my OH's parents best. Also, my parents are divorced which makes keeping in touch even harder. Can you predict which of those, or many other, factors will affect your own family twenty years down the line? Which leads to the question: what's the point of worrying now?

I am positive you will be able to maintain a wonderful relationship with your son/s if that's the way it turns out. Good luck!

 

[saraaa]

Well ladies had my early scan on Saturday to find out I am indeed having a boy! I wasn't disappointed at all think I just got myself worked up about it and started worrying for no reason a lot of my friends have boys or both and say their boys have always been more loving than the girls.
Looking forward to starting the journey with our little boy!! Xx

 

[Misscalais]

Aww congrats on a healthy little boy I hope he brings you as much joy as my little boys bring me

 

[MonyMony]

Congratulations!

I wouldn't have chosen for my first to be a boy, but I'm so glad I didn't get to choose! He's equal parts wonderful and frustrating--like any teen!--and we have a good relationship. Raising a son been such an eye-opening experience for me since I only had sisters.

 

[babyjan]

I don't think that applies to my OH, he is always with his mother, very close to her, there for her whenever she needs him and just helpful to his mum in general, he probably sees my mum once every 2/3 months, we live closer to his family and about an hour away from mine, I love my mother & family dearly but rarely see them because of the distance, wish we could see them often.

I just wanted to show you that not every guy forgets his own mother and spends time with his wife's side, certainly not the case for us.

Boys are amazing and I'm truly glad I have my lil boy x

 

[saraaa]

I think another thing was me and my mum are very close but oh and his mum hardly talk, most of the time she texts me to get some sort of response to things she's asked him :/
Thanks for everyone's input ladies xx