Opinions please

Discussion in 'Santa's Grotto' started by leeanne, Dec 21, 2009.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. leeanne

    leeanne Mom of 3 and Stepmom of 2

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2008
    Messages:
    21,434
    Likes Received:
    1
    This year my stepkids will be over Christmas Eve until the afternoon of Christmas Day. I've spent 3/4 of what I bought for our 3 kids, afterall, even one gift for 12 years olds is expensive.

    Because their's is more expensive, and because they get two Christmas', they don't have nearly what my kids will be openning on Christmas Day. They have a stocking each but less than 1/2 of what Amanda, Jayden and Chase will be openning.

    In the past I always tried to give equal gifts amongst them all if they were here on Christmas morning. Not so this year.

    So, in order to prevent hard feelings (even though my stepkids are 12 and should understand now) would you just let it all happen OR only put 1/2 of the other kids presents under the tree and then have them open the rest on Christmas night after the other kids are gone?

    My OH says just let it all happen on Christmas morning. I am thinking of doing the latter.
     
  2. dizzyspells

    dizzyspells Mia & Finnlays Mummy.xxx

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2009
    Messages:
    7,424
    Likes Received:
    0
    Replied to you on the Christmas Morning thread.xx
     
  3. princess_bump

    princess_bump Happy Wife & Mumma!

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2008
    Messages:
    30,424
    Likes Received:
    0
  4. leeanne

    leeanne Mom of 3 and Stepmom of 2

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2008
    Messages:
    21,434
    Likes Received:
    1
    I meant to post it in it's own thread. LOL :dohh:

    Thing is, the stepkids have to learn at some point I suppose.

    However, another part of me would also think it's fun to come home after dinner and tell the kids, "Oh, Santa left these downstairs for you too." And then they get to open more without making the other two feel bad.

    See, I guess I am more concerned as they know who goes out and gets the gifts, and I will be looked at as the bad person...not OH.
     
  5. MummyJo

    MummyJo Mummy to 2 girls!

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2009
    Messages:
    569
    Likes Received:
    0
    :hugs::hugs: Tough situation.
    I'll be really honest and it'll probably make me sound like a selfish poo BUT!

    I grew up with my dad and step-mum and at Christmas (and Birthdays etcetera) I'd always get about half of what my brothers (my step-mums kids) did. Their reasoning was much similar to yours, we got some things from our real mum as well.

    Although again my mum would spend a lot less on us than she did her children that lived with her so in all we were worse than everyone!

    Anyway, it really felt like we were unwanted. It's not really the child's fault they have two sets of parents... each parent should want to spend the same amount on EACH of their children, regardless of who else they may or may not get things from.

    Obviously your situation is slightly different as they don't live with you full time, but personally I'd go with the latter option. They are older and they would understand BUT if there was any hard feeling it would be on you ('stopping' their dad spoiling them - rightly or wrongly) and on their dad ("not caring enough to get them all the same".)

    I think your children will quite enjoy finding more presents later on, it'd be quite exciting for them. They don't need to know the reason behind it and it stops any chance of bad feeling.

    Sorry for rambling!
    (Admittedly there were a lot of other family issues going on and if you're stepchildren are more secure in their family situation, which I imagine they are, it shouldn't be as much of a problem.) xxx
     
  6. Vickie

    Vickie Hannah & Rhys <3

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2007
    Messages:
    68,398
    Likes Received:
    3
    that is a tough one. I like the idea of the kids coming home to gifts from Santa, my mom did that one year and it was really cool and something I'll always remember. But your kids will end up telling the older ones about it eventually so they will find out...
     
  7. mommyof3co

    mommyof3co Mommy of 4 amazing boys!

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2008
    Messages:
    10,532
    Likes Received:
    0
    I personally would only put part of them under so it's more even in the morning and do the rest that evening. I think at 12 they still might get their feelings hurt even though they do have some to go home to. And your kids (not step) will probably think it's cool to do it twice like their step siblings will get to, going home and doing more.
     
  8. leeanne

    leeanne Mom of 3 and Stepmom of 2

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2008
    Messages:
    21,434
    Likes Received:
    1
    Yes, I think I will stick with them openning some up in the a.m. and the rest at night. I won't tell my kids that they have more coming but will spring it on them when we get home after dinner.

    I know my stepkids and remember when they were younger and had finished openning their big pile and saying "Is that it?" LOL
     
  9. cherrybomb28

    cherrybomb28 Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2009
    Messages:
    35
    Likes Received:
    0
    Defintely go with the last one Leanne!! :)
     
  10. emilyjade

    emilyjade mummy of two!

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2009
    Messages:
    9,540
    Likes Received:
    0
    id deffo go for them opening them later :)
     
  11. nievesmama

    nievesmama Proud mum of 3 xx

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2009
    Messages:
    588
    Likes Received:
    0
    Id definately leave some for later x
     
  12. Aidan's Mummy

    Aidan's Mummy Mummy to Aidan and Oliver

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2008
    Messages:
    11,984
    Likes Received:
    0
    I dont think ist selfish hun

    But deifanlty leave some to open when the step kids have gone at least then you cant be accused of tryingto upset them on purpose
    xx
     
  13. Elli21

    Elli21 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2008
    Messages:
    11,453
    Likes Received:
    0
    I agree also.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice