Other Topic - Facebook!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by Blondie2008, Apr 16, 2009.

  1. Blondie2008

    Blondie2008 Mum to the amazing Bethan

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    Not really pregnancy related but wanted to ask your opinions on something.

    I have just got back in touch with a friend on Facebook. I bloomin hate that thing but I still use it!!!! LOL!
    Anyway she was on about meeting up – coming to see me. But the thing is that I have looked through her profile and she’s a bloomin Marketing Manager for a company in Dubai and travels between there and the ‘New York office’. There are all sorts of pictures of her travelling around the world with her boyfriend etc.

    I know it’s a terrible thing to say but I feel a bit embarrassed at the thought of her coming to our house. I got married at 24 and live in a semi in an ok area. I am 27 now and expecting baby number 1. I haven’t done anything amazing – went to Uni but it didn’t work out (long story). I already feel intimidated by her and I haven’t seen her for about 6 years!
    My husband would be gutted if her knew how I felt because we have such a happy life together – but it’s all very normal if you know what I mean.
    Damn Facebook. Debating closing the thing down :cry:
     
  2. saraendepity

    saraendepity Daisy's Mummy and TTC!

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    aw hun :hugs: we all go our own way in life and do our own amazing things in our own way...you are making a baby that is the most amazing and precious thing you could EVER do - never mind traveling the world...anyone could do that - only you could bring your baby into the world :hugs: :hugs:

    sara

    xxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  3. Jkelmum

    Jkelmum Well-Known Member

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    :hugs: She is coming to see you not what you have done with your life , was she a good friend ? if so meet if not make ur excuses but i am sure thats not why shes coming xxx
     
  4. snettyb

    snettyb Well-Known Member

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    I get where your coming from hun but at the same time she could be proper miserable with her life and thats why she wants to meet up with old friends. Maybe she longs to settle down and have a family but work gets in the way. Sounds to me like you have both been successfull, its just that you have persued different paths. To be married with your own place and a baby on the way sounds like a wonderful life :) Don't worry about what people think hun, if you wanna meet her, then do, if you don't then don't. :hugs: xx
     
  5. BumbleBump

    BumbleBump Mummy to 3 girlies!

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    :hugs: I hate facebook too!

    I have the same problem when people ask me to meet up - mainly low self esteem, I've put on a bit of weight since school days and I'm very shy (I'll struggle going to baby groups or BnB meetings for the same reason though I'm desperate to do both - I'd love to make more friends!).

    However, if she wants to meet up it's obvious that she'd love to see you and I bet she won't be doing it just to gloat about her high flying lifestyle. I have a few friends I see on facebook who seem the same, but honestly I wouldn't swap it for my life, my LO is the best thing I've ever done and I'm honestly a million times more proud of her than my Uni degree.

    Do you have to meet her at your house? You could meet somewhere else just so it's one less worry off your mind, but even if she did visit you there I'm sure she'll have similar pangs of how settled and happy you are and how you've made a home - the grass is always greener on the other side xx
     
  6. pink_cabbage

    pink_cabbage Beccy & Esmée

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    I know where you're coming from too hun, although I'm from the "opposite" direction. Although I'm not as successful as working for a massive international company, compared to most of my old school friends I'm the one that's "done something". Although I only went to Uni, most of them stayed in our old town, settled down with kids and got jobs... and I'd say they were just as "successful" as me.
    Since getting pregnant and moving back to this area, I've got in touch with a lot more of them... and they're absolutely no different to how they were, and it's refreshing to meet people who I have a shared history with. I don't think any less of them, and they think no more of me...
    Deep down, we're all from the same mould if you like, and I'm counting on a lot of them for help when the baby comes 'cause I haven't got a clue, whereas they've been doing it for a while - I need them, not the other way round, despite how on a social scale I might be classed as more "successful"!
    So I really don't think your friend will be bothered! She'll be thinking the same - "I get to meet someone from my past, who knows me for me, and who I don't have to do all the farting work stuff with!" She asked to meet up with you remember?! And surely she's seen YOUR Facebook?!

    Don't be worrying about it hun *hugs*
     
  7. Kimboowee

    Kimboowee Complete

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    She might be jealous of what you've got, a husband and a baby on the way!
     
  8. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    i know what you mean and how ungreatful we sound, and how upsetting it is for our partners. my mr.man works fulltime so everything we have is because of his job/him working however many hours so to turn around and say that i don't feel as good as somebody else is hurtful to him, but i can't help it. at times like you i do feel like that. all we want is for women especially to see us as somebody who has it all. being a fulltime mother at times doesn't feel like 'having it all' it's unrewarding at times, hard work at times, lonely at times, it's really bloody same old same old monotonous at times. nobody ever admits though that at times being a parent isn't all wonder and fabulousness.

    this sounds so horrible, but at times it's hard to feel like you've got it all when you are full of stretchmarks,aches/pains, baby sick/dribble/drawings and god knows what else!! when you hear of others visiting such amazing places. one thing i have noticed with life in the past several years is that the grass isn't always greener, and there is a hell of alot of 'stuff' people just never mention, they only ever tell/show the best parts of their life.

    xXx
     
  9. Blondie2008

    Blondie2008 Mum to the amazing Bethan

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    Thanks for your responses with this guys. I'm glad that i'm not the only one that feels this way sometimes. I decided that i should pull myself together and be happy that i have such a good life and a little baby on the way. Who needs New York anyway! ;-)

    Have replied and said that i would love to meet up so wish me luck with it!

    Also just realised (after some investigating / being nosy on Facebook) that the reason that she is back home at the moment is becasue she no longer wants to live abroad. She's back with her parents and looking for work in the local area!

    xx
     
  10. amslou

    amslou TTC No2

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    DH Best Man comes up to see us all the time. they were on a uni course together and he got a job as i director in london. DH would like nothing more than a big break like that but his friend said he would swap everything he has for what we have and thats only each other and soon our baby. We dont have a house or a grand lifestyle so like others have said. the grass is always greener.
     
  11. mz_jackie86

    mz_jackie86 Well-Known Member

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    Aww hun u never no u may have what she wants if that makes sense!
    Ive done the travelling thing and yer its fun but theres nothing better than settling down with someone you love an having a family.....be proud of what u have and what u have achieved because u never no how many people actually want it!!! xxx
     
  12. Sherileigh

    Sherileigh Well-Known Member

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    I'm on the other side...I've always travelled to exotic places...lived abroad and generally done some fantastic things...always had friends at home with babies and hubbies...while I wouldn't trade my experiences for the world, it was very lonely at times. And honestly everyone has their own path, and their own experiences, what's the right path for her, probably wouldn't been the right path for you. Having a hubby and baby on the way is pretty damn fantastic if you ask me!!
     
  13. mrsholmes

    mrsholmes Well-Known Member

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    I wouldnt be suprsied if she felt the same, you sound like you have a lovely life oh, house and baby on the way. All she has is her career which can be a very lonely life. Be proud, being a mother is the most important job in the world:hugs:
     

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