Over analyzing...

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by Confusing, Oct 2, 2013.

  1. Confusing

    Confusing Well-Known Member

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    Hey all :) just looking for abit of advice

    My OH and myself have always wanted a boy, but I will be overwhelmed with joy boy or girl. I actually put my OH on the spot for the first time last night and said what if we have a girl? He jokingly said don't say that. I said well what if we do? He said in all honesty I would be really disappointed. I said jokingly well you've probably jinxed it. And he said I want a girl (to try and jinx it again so we have a boy)It took me back because he didn't follow it on. I said that's really nice like we can choose what sex we have, what will happen if we find out it's a girl at the gender scan are you going to be unhappy for the rest of the pregnancy? He said no he will love her asmuch as a boy but still just want a boy.

    What can I say to this? It's putting a downer on the fact of *what if* we are baking a little girl in here? What would other people think/do? Thanks for reading everyone. :)
     
  2. 1eighty

    1eighty Well-Known Member

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    gender disappointment is a very real issue for both parents and often unavoidable. we really wanted a girl, but at the 20w scan (in a different country) we were told boy. my gender disappointment lasted all of five seconds, i swear.

    again, we'd like a girl, but i will honestly be happy with either. another boy might mean baby #3 in a couple of years though! DH *really* wants a little princess though and he might be disappointed (briefly) if we have another boy.

    if you do have a girl and he is shitty about it, please don't take it personally - it's either a genuine feeling that he has no control over (and you can get some good advice in the private gender disappointment forum here) or he's being a dick and wanting a "male heir" in which case he can just grow up and move on. it's important to figure out which before reacting to it though.

    best of luck, and i hope you have a healthy happy pregnancy!
     
  3. Confusing

    Confusing Well-Known Member

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    Thank you! You're post alone has put it into a better perspective! Really appreciate it. Hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy too! :)
     
  4. cait

    cait Well-Known Member

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    I can understand how this could upset you, but he is just being honest. I'm usually a team yellow champion but I think if I was you I would definitely ask the gender at the 20 week scan, so if it is a girl you both have time to get used to it.
    I'm sure he will bond just as well with the baby either way, but you might prefer to have him turn his disappointment into joy before the day of the birth.
     

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