P*ssed off (Rant)

[Lynsay]

Hi ladies,

been thinking about this alot recently as we have been TTC again.

When I was pregnant I had a funny rusty coloured blood so I was taken in for an early scan...all was fine and I was 6 weeks 4 days. Lovely little heartbeat...

I went to my DR's after that to sort out a midwife appt...which I eventually got for when I was roughly 10 weeks.

I had to FIGHT...(and I mean fight) for a dating scan. Three DR's, two midwifes and a lady at the EPAU all said that because I'd had a scan at 6 weeks 4 days all is fine etc. It turns out that our baby had grown wings at 8 weeks...I had been wondering around for 5 weeks not knowing the awful news which we were told at the scan.

Our world was broken.

Next time round I'm going to be a nervous wreck!!! I could barely hold it together last time, I'm going to be so much worse next time round, plus I'll be petrified about having another MMC, and then again on top of that I'll be bricking it about the scans and having to argue with doctors etc.

What I'd like to know is...

Is it better to go private?

My OH told me that next time he wants to go private, but it costs a fortune! I'd like to pick my own scan dates (which our private hospital said I could do) so I'd like one at 12 weeks then one at 20 weeks...and if needed they'd do a reassurance scan at 8-10 weeks (which I'd try not to have)...

I honestly believe that the stress of it all could have had something to do with it...Can my DR not see what not having a dating scan would have done to me? I'd already gone 5 weeks without knowing, and even still it took tablets to kick start it

I just want a straight forward pregnancy next time...

Sorry girls, but I feel a bit better for ranting xx

 

[zelda]

I can completely understand.I was thinking about private scans if I get pregnant again but it isnt just the scans that is part of antenatalcare its also the midwife etc and Im not sure how that works or the cost.

 

[Lynsay]

Thanks Zelda, Yeah I seem to remember my friend saying that the Private scans etc were paid for (around £500 in total!!) and she also decided to give birth in a private hospital. She's pregnant again with number 2 and going private again - she said it's very expensive but well worth it for the service, level of care and reassurance she got from them.

She had a brilliant pregnancy though, sailed right through it with no hiccups. She wasnt even worried...I'm just destined to have a rough time - nothing ever goes right for me

I was just wondering if anyone in here TTCAL had any experience of going private.

Are you doing it privatley next time? xx

 

[LOULOU8888]

hi know exactly how you feel i found out i was pregnant again after my first miscarriage and fought to get an early scan, which they wouldnt provide, didnt even get my midwife appt through until 10 weeks then got past 12 weeks had scan and found out babys heartbeat stopped at 9 weeks. So even though i had a previous miscarriage they wouldnt entertain keeping a closer eye on me the 2nd time round and it happened again, so i really dont know how im going to feel if i ever get pregnant again

 

[Lawa]

hi ladies speaking here from experience! I have had 6 early miscarriages now never seen a heartbeat. It doesn't get any easier all you can do is to take each day as a new step each little bit as a milestone.

Give yourself something to look forward to. It is very difficult to blame and shout at everyone else as you are looking for an outlet to your grief and emotion. I was the same when our consultant told me that my miscarriages are bad luck after number four and to just keep trying.

Just try and think positive and treat every day as a new one xxx

 

[Loui1001]

I was talking to DH about going private next time too, we had a dating scan when I was 11 wks and it was a mmc too and the baby had died at 8 wks, it was awful to think that we'd been thinking everything was fine when it wasn't and I don't know if I could go through the early weeks again without some sort of regular reassurance!!!
But just have to stay positive (even though it's so bloody hard) - keep thinking i'm putting on too much of a brave face - keep having people telling me I'm doing great in not letting it get me down and I literally want to scream at them