Paranoia is ruining everything

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by mummy2lola, Jan 28, 2011.

  1. mummy2lola

    mummy2lola Mum to 2 trying for 3

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    I'm 16+2 and really thought the worry would stop after 12wks,I've been to scared to buy even a little something incase I don't get to use it.tonight my brother phoned to say my niece has outgrown her lovely cot and they are buying her a bed so offered me the pine cot,really thick mattress,20 sheets,17 beds sets,bumpers all for £10 and I'm sat here crying coz it's such a bargain but I'm so scared to have it in the house.the mattress would cost about 140 alone and I thought they don't smoke or anything so should b alright to keep it as we wouldn't put baby in it until 4-6 months after the swinging crib but even that's worrying me now.....arrrrrggggghhhhhh I just wanna enjoy it and be excited about everything xx
     
  2. zippy4

    zippy4 Well-Known Member

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    Hun you just have to think positive. I have all my wee mans stuff in the house. After 2 losses I just want to celebrate and enjoy this pregnancy. You have no reason to be scared, your little bubba made it through 1st tri so it's strong. Have faith and go for the cot and relax xx
     
  3. Clopatjo

    Clopatjo Well-Known Member

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    I know what you mean :) Its hard not to worry every day and be paranoid. I was and am a little like that and hadn't bought anything for babes. But then I just said you dont get these times back again you have to enjoy this time as it will fly in before your little one arrives. Let yourself relax and buy a little few things, I bought my first pair of booties last week and I was delighted. We still worry but please god all will be well x
     
  4. Ember

    Ember Pregnant - 3rd Trimester

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    I'd definitely go for it! That really is an amazingly incredible deal.

    Try not to worry, as worrying and stressing out actually makes it more likely for something to happen. Positive thoughts are always helpful! I have been scared of something happening, too, but I just shove those nasty little demons to the back of my mind and replace them with positive thoughts about the future. I just keep telling myself that everything will be fine.

    I don't know if this will help or not, but truthfully if something were to happen, you would probably get pregnant again and eventually, I'm sure you would have your little miracle, and can use it all then. Or you could adopt. Worst case scenario, you give up trying to have kids and sell it for a profit. This is what I always said about all the baby stuff hubby and I collected over our 4+ years of TTC. This way, we had the stuff if we did have a baby, and could always sell it if we decided to stop trying and not adopt.

    I know it's always easier said than done, though, all the advice about not worrying and how to put your mind at ease. I constantly worried and frequently cried while TTC, and I've been super paranoid throughout this pregnancy. Yesterday morning I woke up terrified of our baby dying before she's born for no rational reason. I'll always be afraid of that until she's born, but I'm focusing on a bright and positive future and not letting it get to me for now.

    :hugs: Hang in there!
     
  5. Babydance

    Babydance Well-Known Member

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    Take it! I was EXACTLY the same as you i was convinced i'd miscarry, then that she'd be premature then she'd be still born.. if you keep worrying you'll look back over your pregnanyc and regret all the worry you did and how you lost out on the pleasure and enjoyment. Yes something MAY go wrong but its unlikely, and with each day get up and tell yourself you will enjoy today with your baby. I really know where youre coming from cos i was the same. But someone said to me once.. whether you buy everything or nothing you'll still be devastated if something happens .. and its true. So enjoy your wee bumpy and try and always think positive, push those bad thoughts to the back of your mind xxxxx
     
  6. mummy2lola

    mummy2lola Mum to 2 trying for 3

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    Thanks ladies,I always feel better when I've been on here.I honestly thought ttc was the hardest part but when u finally get the thing u want most in the world the fear of losing it takes over but I do have my days where I let myself imagine baby being Herr and it takes my breath away....as my brother said to me,urll worry for the next 18 years now about something so get used to it....always makes me giggle xx
     
  7. spring_baby

    spring_baby <a href="http://pregnancy

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    sweetheart you have to stay positive and remember that having baby items in yr house ready is a good way of budgeting as babies are expensive and that is a good deal, also that just by having baby things isnt going to cause anything to go wrong in yr pregnancy:)
    If that was the case then no one would have more than one child as most people have their second child within a few yearsof their first and then have all the baby paraphenalia that they need for the second baby at home:)
    I havent gone mad buying everything in site yet and still have a lot to buy but I have the moses basket and stand and bedding and my pram breast pump and changing bag, the rest I will purchase after my baby shower tomorrow, prob from about 30 weeks as a way to distract myself and hopefully the last few weeks will fly by thats my plan anyway.
    I know its hard but I had 2 mcs before concieving this baby so I am trying to enjoy every second that this pregnancy presents even though we are having problems and are now high risk. I think the trouble is there is too much info out there about the negative side of pregnancy and in a way though i worried with my other 3 childrens pregnancies I didnt worry to this extreme and i suffered a mc before concieving my first as well, the information wasnt out there as much as it is now, mind neither was the internet my eldest is nearly 18:)
    Bet you cant imagine a world without the internet lol xx
     
  8. mummy2lola

    mummy2lola Mum to 2 trying for 3

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    Thanx spring_baby ur so right,I probably wouldn't worry about half the things I do if I didn't have the internet as I hadn't heard of most of it lol xx
     
  9. mumoffive

    mumoffive Well-Known Member

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    If it bothers you, buy it and get someone else to store it for you! Accept..sounds like a great bargain! I can understand you worrying but you really cannot let it ruin your pregnancy. You need to put things into perspective. Lots of women have babies daily and everything goes just fine. You have no reason to worry. Just keep yourself healthy and thats all you can do. Worry is just a wasted emotion that is spoiling things for you. Dont live on ifs and buts but the here and now and take one day at a time. Worry is being a parent sadly and when baby comes it wont end there! You need to just sit back and enjoy every moment..otherwise you will actually make yourself sick with worry for no good reason. x
     
  10. Al Syr

    Al Syr Well-Known Member

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    I feel the same sometimes, I had an episode of very light spotting at around 6 weeks and I thought it was over. Fortunately everything kept going well and couldnt wait to get to 12 weeks. Bow I am past that and I am still for some reason trying to find reasons to worry like crazy. Over a week ago I kept thinking I may have an incompetent cervix, then this last week I though that my amniotic fluid was going to start leaking . . . I wonder what next week will be. I DO read too much online and there is certain sites where if you ask something about your worries someone who has had a bad experience like a loss or something are not compasionate and are very blunt and makes the person asking real worried. I think I may start buying things soon, maybe. Good Luck, I know everything will be ok.

    https://global.thebump.com/tickers/ttd2d1e.aspx

    https://global.thebump.com/tickers/ttb2d5f.aspx
     
  11. BECC4

    BECC4 1st time mum to Jacob

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    Whatever is meant to be is meant to be, having a cot house won't stop it from happening nor will it make you feel any worse if something horrid happens. It really is a great deal you should go for it. I'm quite scientific and I find it helps to think in terms of what's most likely. Statistically the numbers are on your side in a big, big way. You would be incredibly unfortunate for something that bad to happen, it will dawn on you at some point that you are going home with a baby and when it does (it was my 20wk scan for me) you'll be grinning like an idiot. Every week that goes by baby is stronger, try some relaxation techniques and remember things get worse if we think they're gonna be worse. You WILL go home with a baby who will be perfect on every way. Start telling yourself that and it will happen :) Hugs xxx
     

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