Petrified about the birth

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by 10thSept, Sep 1, 2009.

  1. 10thSept

    10thSept Mummy to one

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    Ok, so as it draws closer and inevitable, I am just getting more and more petrified about giving birth.

    I was in denial about the whole giving birth bit for ages, but then I went for ante natal classes, both NHS and NCT and learnt all about the pain relief, coping etc etc

    But in the last few days I've become really really scared about it, I don't know how I'll be able to cope and it makes me want to cry when I think about it.

    Is this normal - or rather does anyone else feel this way? It feels very selfish, as of course I want to meet my baby, of course I know it has to come out, but I don't know how I'm going to deal with the actual getting it out thing!!
     
  2. AtomicPink

    AtomicPink Well-Known Member
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    I think its complete instinct honey - I had nothing to go on and didnt have a clue what to do! You will be fine - remember everyone does it - and not only the once!
     
  3. diz

    diz Well-Known Member

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    :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

    i'm with you on this honey... i feel exactly the same... moments of calm and complete serenity, followed by sheer fight!

    I'm sure we'll get through it xxxx
     
  4. mellllly

    mellllly Mummy to 3 under 4!

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    You will be absolutly fine hun, it is nothing to worry about at all!
    Your body instinctivly knows what to do and it somehow copes with it! As soon as that baby is out and in your arms everything is forgotten about!
     
  5. firegal

    firegal Well-Known Member

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    I think is that none of us first time mums really know what to expect and that's pretty scary! I've got faith in you though hun, instinct will kick in and you'll be amazed and how strong you can be.... :hugs:
     
  6. Fern.x

    Fern.x Guest

    When i was pregnant the one great bit of advise i got was everybodys labour is different, When i went ito labour i didnt know stupid i know i remeber getting lot of cramps and saying i am in labour!?lol the scaryiest thing is not knowing how long its going to last but your body will let you know with the unbelieveable urge too push! good luck and remeber the calmer you are the better it is trust me the gas and air wont work otherwise x
     
  7. sara k

    sara k Well-Known Member

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    first time mummy normally feels like this...same here...:hugs:
     
  8. 10thSept

    10thSept Mummy to one

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    Thanks ladies.
    I hope you're right and instinct takes over - I'm not that scared about the contractions, it's the actual pushing it out bit that I'm terified about.
    Maybe I'm deluded, but I figure I can cope with the contractions, with the help of gas and air, or if necessary, an epidural. But it seems no pain relief works for the pushing it out bit and so that's what I'm terrified about.
    I'm a wuss with pain in general and so something that people all say is sooo painful, I think, how will I cope?
    I know it's irrational, millions of women do it, more than once, etc... but it seems to have gone into my head and I'm terrified.
    As I said on another thread, we watched the end of knocked up the other day and when I saw the birth scene I started crying, I couldn't cope with watching someone else go through that, let alone thinking I'm going to have to.
    Oh god, I'm coming out in cold sweats just thinking about it!

    Sorry to be such a whiner!!
     
  9. craftymum

    craftymum Mum to Jacob and Jenna

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    It's normal I'm getting more scared now too as it draws closer though I can't wait for it all to be over and to meet my baby and this is my 2nd but like the others say the more relaxed you are the easier it will be as if you're very tense then you're fighting against your body and although it is scary if it was that bad women wouldn't go back time and time again for more:hugs:
     
  10. firegal

    firegal Well-Known Member

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    My friend who had a baby recently had absolutely no pain relief at all and she said the pushing didn't hurt for her. There was the crowning, which was literally just moments of pain, and then after that it was all so much easier... if you can get through the contractions, which you can, you can get through pushing. Just think how relieved you'll be when you start pushing cos you'll know that your little girl is nearly here :hugs:
     
  11. cupcake

    cupcake Mommy of a gorgeous boy!

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    Hey, its very normal to be nervous, I did not feel the pushing much with an epidural, and when the head comes out its a stinging feeling for a few seconds, but again with the epidural I didnt feel it.
     
  12. 10thSept

    10thSept Mummy to one

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    wow, when I read "your little girl" - well, I can't believe it, I'm going to have a little girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    is it crazy that I still haven't registered????????????????????????????????
     
  13. 10thSept

    10thSept Mummy to one

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    Yeah, I guess when I said pushing, I mean the crowning bit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  14. firegal

    firegal Well-Known Member

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    Not crazy at all, I know exactly what you mean!!!! It's madness that my moving belly actually contains a proper baby!!! :lol:

    The crowning bit doesn't last for long, especially compared to contractions... I guess that's where you really need to just breathe, totally focus on your breathing, and before you know it will be over and your little girl will be on her way into the outside world!
     
  15. faun

    faun Mum to 2 boys and 1 girl

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    You will be fine its over before you know it, crowning doesn't take long just focus on the fact that once you have the head out its seconds until your baby is lying on your chest.
     
  16. 10thSept

    10thSept Mummy to one

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    It is pretty exciting when you think of it like that!!
     
  17. bex2602

    bex2602 Well-Known Member

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    I feel slightly like this - like how is it going to get out!!!! But i think when the time comes you will just do it all without even really worrying or thinking about it!x
     
  18. Kiddo

    Kiddo Well-Known Member

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    I felt just the same but it's amazing how the adrenaline and instinct kick in. It's almost like your body takes over from your brain and just gets on with it. I'm a total wuss and managed it using just gas and air so I'm sure you'll be fine.
     
  19. mellllly

    mellllly Mummy to 3 under 4!

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    The pushing is the easy part! I had about 6 hours established labour and then 25 mins pushing, it stings when baby is crowning but when the head is through its fine.

    All I had was gas and air throughout
     
  20. Anababe

    Anababe Mum of 5, TTC #6!

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    Aww hun its completely normal to feel nervous.

    Im terrified but its my second and i know what to expect. I certainly wouldnt be worried about the pushing bit.. that the easiest and best part! Its amazing, your body completely takes over and does all the work for you. The only part that hurts is when baby is crowning and its only moments, feeling more like a burning/stinging sensation rather than actual pain.

    The contractions are totally different, of course it hurts and i never lie about that.. i personally thought it was agony and didnt cope well at all, but i still did it with no pain relief only gas&air during the actual birth. But it doesnt last forever and somehow your body just copes with the pain. Every labour is different though so i wouldnt worry too much. Just let your body deal with it naturally.

    For me labour was unlike any pain i could imagine and nothing could have prepared me for what i went through.. but im doing it again just 2 yrs later so it cant be THAT bad!! :rofl: I am the biggest wimp ever though..

    You'll be fine :) xxx
     

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