please help! I really really need some way to get baby to sleep more

[Clucky as]

as the title says. my lo is 8 months has been rocked and walked to sleep since day one. I've had some success with self settling but mainly at night. During the night or day time for naps ISA other story
he is waking up earlier and earlier it was before 5 am this morning. I'm exhausted!! his first nap of the day is generally good. But after that it's crap doesn't want to go down at all. and he is getting too big for me to rock to sleep. And I'm going back to work in less then two weeks and he will be in day care.
now I know this is frowned apron by some ladies and ididnt like doing it but am desperate. Tried c/c for the last 48 hours roughly and it's not working. he just gets upset too much. And I am listening to the scale of the cry and he is defiantly crying up.
I know he gets tired roughly two to two and a half hours after waking. he is also tryin to drop his afternoon nap. Will not go down at all. Plus is teething so that's stuffing it even more.
I just need some help. Can't get up before 5 when I will be working afternoons and I think I'm starting to get depressed again.was a bit in the first few months. Just didn't get help, kind a went away by itself? so any advice including your thoughts on sleep training anything at all

Plus please NO DEBATES. ok we all have diff views and I'm just asking for advice thanks heaps in advance

 

[Pielette]

What's a typical day like? Can you post nap times, how long, what time is bedtime etc?

 

[bellaloo]

I feel for you my 9 month old is always the same and awful at sleeping at night and day the best way ive found for him to nap in the day is in his car seat i put him in there with his blanket ted and dummy and he can be rocked as much as he likes then lol i am aware that he will not fit in that car seat for much longer but its working for now lol. Have you tried doing something like that. It may take a week or so for your lo to adjust to it but it might be worth a go? And ive given up with the night times now i just put lo in my bed and he sleeps right through i just couldnt take anymore screaming all night lol so sorry i dont actually have any soloutions for you but i didnt want to read and run x

 

[bellaloo]

Also i did the cc and i didnt find it helped me at all but i know other mums who swear by it x

 

[mrsbeano]

How are you doing your CC? How long do you leave the intervals etc.

I know how frustrating bad sleeping can be and how sleep deprivation can make you feel down. It will be better.

 

[mrsbeano]

Also, sleep training does get worse before it gets better. He's just resisting change x

 

[Clucky as]

Typical day well the one that has been most consistent is:
wake at 5 or 5:30 I hear him play in his cot happily so I leave him ( don't want to get him used to waking up early. he will sometime fall back asleep but most times gets angry and starts crying so I then either try and get him back to sleep which involves and hour of what ever I'm trying or I end up giving up bringing him in to the lounge. I leave the lights very low and no talking until I feed him around 6:30 ( he isn't prob even hungry then but I like to keep something in order lol.
then it's bottle 6:30 breakfast at 7:30 asleep within 20 - 30 mins of breakie . He then sleeps for about 2 hours. So next up at 9:30 or 10
Next bottle at 10:30 lunch at 11:30 play etc in-between and asleep between 12:30 and 1:00
He then may sleep between 40 mins and and an hour and a half really depends weather I've had to leave the house or not. If I'm out and he is asleep in the pram I stay where I am till he finishes his nap.
After then next bottle is at 2:30 pm he doesn't have an afternoon snack most days sometimes if we can fit it in but he has been really off his food lately finding it hard to get three meals in.
last of all is dinner at 5 ish and then we play maybe nappy time etc, while running the bath. bath time then lights low no tv and minimal soft talking . Maybe a story then in to his pjs and sleeping bag and a nice warm bottle with me stroking his forehead he falls asleep on my lap and I carry him to bed.

but all this depends on what time he wakes for the day I keep it consistent at 6:30 but that's it.

 

[daddiesgift]

co sleep. I tried to sleep train #1 and it was way more hassle then it was good, we went back to co sleeping and this kid sleeps 12 hours at a time. We co sleep with our 6 month old and he sleeps great. I let them nap when they want which is always the same time everyday on their own. I cant bare to hear my babies cry when all they want is me to hold them. So thats my advice lol if you want sleep just make them comfortable around you, theyll sleep great.

 

[Clucky as]

Thanks I have thought about co sleeping but I'm a really light sleeper my self and would never get sleep that way. I know it works for some people but I prefer not.

 

[Clucky as]

Intervals when doing c/c depends on how he is reacting if he starts getting really worked up I have it short intervals of two minutes then three etc. But if he is good I go two then four then six. When I do a check. I go in and pick him up pat the back and calm him right down however long . Then say nap time darling I'm putting u in your cot for your nap love u see u soon kiss on the forehead and leave. I'm feeling pretty crappy today coz he gets upset no matter what I do. Feels like I can't get anything right. except cuddle him which I still enjoy.

 

[daddiesgift]

Intervals when doing c/c depends on how he is reacting if he starts getting really worked up I have it short intervals of two minutes then three etc. But if he is good I go two then four then six. When I do a check. I go in and pick him up pat the back and calm him right down however long . Then say nap time darling I'm putting u in your cot for your nap love u see u soon kiss on the forehead and leave. I'm feeling pretty crappy today coz he gets upset no matter what I do. Feels like I can't get anything right. except cuddle him which I still enjoy.

So sorry to hear that Dont worry it will pass. Have you tried putting him to sleep then putting him in his bed? I was told that its really hard the first week or two but then they get use to being alone in there bed so just stick with it! Can your OH help? Its harder on us mothers to hear baby upset. It could also be a lot of things causing it more than just not wanting to sleep. Teething maybe?? When #1 was born he slept in bed with me till about 2 months then in a crib next to the bed for a month then from 3-6 months he was in his own room, in his own bed no problem at all!! Then right around 6 months old he would wake screaming and screaming and screaming. I would cuddle him in his room in rocking chair till he fell asleep then put him back in bed and hed wake a few minutes later screaming again!! We obviously finally gave up and brought him in with us but the doctor told me he was teething and the pain was causing him to need comfort, also around the stage they become more mobile they become more aware of their surrondings and they are more scared of things then they were before. A crib mobile was nice it played music and had a little light for him so he wasnt in the black.

I hate to say it too not saying this is your LO but some babies are just more needy. #1 was/is like that for us. Hes almost two and still needs my cuddles to even take a nap! We put him in his room for nap only once hes fallen asleep but still wakes up crying He wont nap anywhere that Im not there. He wont go to bed with out me either! But #2 could care less when, where, how or who is putting him to sleep.

 

[Clucky as]

Not even the walking and rocking works now. I've had a pj and no housework day today. Just focusing on sleep for both of us. It is teething . I've bonjela him and given nurophen and still not good. Think it's just a matter of accepting it for now and readdressing after he has finished teething. Thanks for all the replys .

 

[Millnsy]

When my lo got to 8 months no amount of nursing or rocking would work. It's so frustrating cos everything that used to work stopped! We had to resort to CIO because going in at intervals got her more annoyed. First night was about 40 mins then 20 and now never more than 10 mins and sometimes none. That was just night time though. Daytime naps were all taken in the buggy until the last month or so. She just would not settle in the day time in the cot (in fact for about a week she slept all night in the buggy!) the teething was so bad that she was so frustrated, rolling around in the cot kept her awake but we found strapping her in the buggy kept her still and she was more able to settle. (I should add that she wasn't fighting the buggy so it wasn't like we were restraining her!).

Your routine sounds the same as ours. She has been sleeping through until 3 or 4 then feeding and sleeping until 6:30 but on the days she sleeps til 5 she won't go back down to sleep unless I lay with her and feed and even then she doesn't always go back to sleep. It's exhausting but ride it out! Last night she slept through until 6:20am whoop whoop!

Keep doing what you are doing and carry in dosing up with pain relief, this teething is evil x

 

[mrsbeano]

I think you need to lengthen your intervals. He will go bonkers for the first couple of minutes but I would start at going in every 10 minutes and limit it at 15 minutes.

I would also try to only settle within his cot. So just walk in, hand on tummy or back 'there there. Its okay. Its just time to go to sleep now.'

Be very consistent with this for all bedtimes and night wakings and I would hope that you'll see some improvement. It is highly likely that by going in every 2 minutes its winding him up more than teaching him how to fall asleep on his own.

I hope that helps x

 

[daddiesgift]

We use amber teething necklaces and I truely believe they work. Not the ones they chew on they just wear them. I got our oldest one around 6 to 7 months old and within a month things were better. He's worn one ever since through most of his teeth coming through and you'd never know it! The baby started wearing a amber anklet about 2 months old. Now he's in a necklace and got his first tooth and I didn't know it till I felt it. His two top teeth are coming in as well.

Worth checking out!

 

[Clucky as]

I've been told about the amber necklaces. Bit worried about choking etc. But an anklet might be with looking in to. And thanks mrsbeano i'l try the longer ones. so start with 5 mins go in shush pat etc, then ten and repeat till 15 mins? He seams to get even more screamy if I don't pick him up. the crying is wearing me down . I broke down in tears today thinking I'm a shit mum. Coz even when I picked him up he still cryed and looked at me like " why mummy why" . I should never have rocked him to sleep ever and should ve started this ages ago. I've got a week till I go back to work. Hubby will have to give me a couple of proper sleeps a week. he works a ton of hours and has issues of his own.
Thanks for listening me rant just feels good to whinge.

 

[kimberleyrobx]

We filled emilys belly up with warm cereal e.g wheetabix or ready brek right before bed so she slept all night xx

 

[mrsbeano]

I have to occupy myself. Go and do a job and just keep an eye on the time. Don't just sit there listening to it because its not nice.

He's just learning how to sleep. It'll be better for all of you when he' well rested.

When I returned to work me and hubby split the nights. We both got a proper lie in at the weekend too unless we were busy. Buy earplugs and really make the most of it because you need it to feel well rested x

 

[daddiesgift]

You just have to be careful with the necklaces the only way they could choke is if they caught on something but they are pretty short so to me that would be pretty hard to do! Even when laying down if the necklace falls to the bed and is tight on neck it doesnt even leave a mark so it doesnt ever tightly squeeze! I bought a bracelet and used it as an anklet not sure if they make anklets.

 

[Clucky as]

I did it today for one of his naps. Holly molly! I did 5 then 10 then 15 ( Ferber?) I got to ten and when I left he went even more mental. I stopped it right there. Picked him up and went to our recliner and just held him. His face was all tear stained etc. Feels wrong. I don't know. but I cuddled him till he settled and then put him in his cot. And he was asleep in 2 minutes. weather it was coz I hugged him or did CIO I don't know but he was awake when I put him down. Maybe pupd is the answer? it's his orientation at day care tomorrow wish me luck guys I'm sad already.