Please mommies! I really want to breastfeed this time!!

[MommyMoore503]

I am having my 3rd baby in December. Wasn't able to breastfeed the first daughter due to a pituitary tumor that decreased prolactin. Looking back, I regretfully wish if I could have done more with the second. With my second daughter I tried to get her to latch for a few hours at the hospital. She was crying, I was crying..and the nurses quickly had a bottle with formula ready to go. Needless to say, I kept her on the bottle and my milk never came in. This time around I really want to do things differently. I mean, REALLY. My tumor has since been treated and I can tell this time around that my breasts are preparing for baby much MUCH differently (ooouuuuccchhhhh!)

I'm scared I won't be able to figure it out and I feel really unprepared. I feel there isn't a whole lot of support once you get to the hospital for breastfeeding newbies. How will I know my baby isn't starving since my milk won't come in for a few days? Having a 3 y/o and 5 y/o, how will I sit long enough to feed baby? I can barely sit now! I guess I have so many concerns that I'll fail at it I really want to do what's best for baby. Is pumping to bottlefeed a good option for the busy mom? I've heard from a few mothers that when all you do it pump you're milk will dry up. Can someone offer me any advice? I just noticed a great thhread on this that's pretty active, just thought I'd 'milk' you all for a little extra advice!!

Fingers crossed!!

XOXO
Suzy

 

[abanana]

Well I really have no advice.. I am sorry. I just looked because I have had three children and never been able to breastfeed due to pain and not getting them to latch, I always have gotten so engorged.. I just really want to try this time around to even if its only a short period of time.. I know any is better than none, right?? I hope you get the answers you need, and hopefully I can find some thing to help me as well. Good Luck!!

 

[zoe4eva]

Just keep trying. My 3rd child took 2 months to latch on properly, before that I kept adjusting her mouth and having to start again over and over. My 2nd baby breast fed for a year so I was pretty good at knowing when thing weren't right.
Could you go to some breastfeeding classes? I don't know where youre from, but round here they do groups and classes.
It is persistence that prevails. And don't think that because you gave the baby the bottle on the first night, that you have to continue...u don't! Don't let midwives or doctors pressure you into bottle feeding either, it's up to you. And if you feel bad that you didn't do it with the others then, know inside that- this is what YOU REALLY WANT and let no-one take that away.
Good luck.
Breastfeeding is amazing! I feel more connected to my babies because I did with mine...one I couldn't and I regret that.

 

[Sherileigh]

Firstly no your milk will not dry up if you pump regularly. I pumped for 9 months with my son before supply started to decrease. But let me tell you that pumping exclusively us way more time consuming than bF'ing or formula feeding. After you feed the baby you then need to pump. At first you need to pUmp at least 8 times a day.
I plan on trying a sling of some sort so I can feed and do things with DS. Also want to include DS in the feeding, get him to bring me things, rub the babies feet. Just generally help.

 

[amerikiwi]

I found having good support around me was essential to establishing breastfeeding with my daughter. Does your hospital have a lactation consultant who can work with you to ensure your LO gets a good latch? Also, many hospitals now run breastfeeding classes before and after birth. Alternatively, your midwife/doctor should be able to give you contact info of private lactation consultants.

Baby will cry but if he/she has a good latch, they are not starving. The colostrum is "liquid gold" and all that they need in those first few days and they only need a few drops. My milk didn't come in until 5 days after birth and although my daughter lost weight in this time (very very normal-don't worry) she continued to have wet nappies which meant she was getting the colostrum. Once the milk came in, she was putting on weight again.

Personally I found my DH to be a great help in latching my DD in the early days. He could hold her hands when she was trying to put them in her mouth whilst also trying to latching on. Additionally, he had a better angle to see the latch. Basically, if baby's bottom lips are curled down around boob instead of puckered out hanging off the nipple, you probably have a good latch. DH was able to see this angle much clearer than me and also see the swallow action that confirms baby is getting the colostrum. I also found after a couple of days, I wasn't sore if my DD was latched correctly whereas an incorrect latch was very painful.

Good luck! You may get lucky and get a natural latcher--but if not, I hope you find the support to get you there.

 

[MommyMoore503]

Firstly no your milk will not dry up if you pump regularly. I pumped for 9 months with my son before supply started to decrease. But let me tell you that pumping exclusively us way more time consuming than bF'ing or formula feeding. After you feed the baby you then need to pump. At first you need to pUmp at least 8 times a day.
I plan on trying a sling of some sort so I can feed and do things with DS. Also want to include DS in the feeding, get him to bring me things, rub the babies feet. Just generally help.

Forgive me for sounding naive, but can you walk around and tend to the other kids while breastfeeding? I have this image in my head that I'll have to sit down in a rocker everytime and I just don't know how that will be possible with how busy I am BUT I know that this is what I want to do. I'd love to learn more about breastfeeding on the go and tips too make it easier!! Thanks for your reply. It's greatly appreciated!

 

[MommyMoore503]

I found having good support around me was essential to establishing breastfeeding with my daughter. Does your hospital have a lactation consultant who can work with you to ensure your LO gets a good latch? Also, many hospitals now run breastfeeding classes before and after birth. Alternatively, your midwife/doctor should be able to give you contact info of private lactation consultants.

Baby will cry but if he/she has a good latch, they are not starving. The colostrum is "liquid gold" and all that they need in those first few days and they only need a few drops. My milk didn't come in until 5 days after birth and although my daughter lost weight in this time (very very normal-don't worry) she continued to have wet nappies which meant she was getting the colostrum. Once the milk came in, she was putting on weight again.

Personally I found my DH to be a great help in latching my DD in the early days. He could hold her hands when she was trying to put them in her mouth whilst also trying to latching on. Additionally, he had a better angle to see the latch. Basically, if baby's bottom lips are curled down around boob instead of puckered out hanging off the nipple, you probably have a good latch. DH was able to see this angle much clearer than me and also see the swallow action that confirms baby is getting the colostrum. I also found after a couple of days, I wasn't sore if my DD was latched correctly whereas an incorrect latch was very painful.

Good luck! You may get lucky and get a natural latcher--but if not, I hope you find the support to get you there.

Thanks so much! I must admit I'm pretty nervous about anyone helping me. I'm very modest and have never been around breastfeeding (sad, isn't it?) I'm really shy so this is going to be me coming out of my box a bit! I'm going to register for a class this evening. Thanks again for your support

 

[amerikiwi]

Firstly no your milk will not dry up if you pump regularly. I pumped for 9 months with my son before supply started to decrease. But let me tell you that pumping exclusively us way more time consuming than bF'ing or formula feeding. After you feed the baby you then need to pump. At first you need to pUmp at least 8 times a day.
I plan on trying a sling of some sort so I can feed and do things with DS. Also want to include DS in the feeding, get him to bring me things, rub the babies feet. Just generally help.

Forgive me for sounding naive, but can you walk around and tend to the other kids while breastfeeding? I have this image in my head that I'll have to sit down in a rocker everytime and I just don't know how that will be possible with how busy I am BUT I know that this is what I want to do. I'd love to learn more about breastfeeding on the go and tips too make it easier!! Thanks for your reply. It's greatly appreciated!

I also intend to use a sling to feed and still be able to tend to my daughter. I didn't use it much the first time but I was able to walk around with her latched on from early on. I've known many people who successfully feed with LO in a Maya type sling or Ergo whilst walking around or playing with toddlers, so I've seen that it can def. be done.

 

[aley28]

I am planning on wearing this baby because I don't know how else I am going to breast feed him! My 2 year old is very active and he gets impatient if I sit still for too long... I don't see that changing just because I'm feeding his brother.

The carriers I'm looking into for breastfeeding are the Moby wrap and a Mai Tei. From the videos on YouTube, the Moby looks more comfortable for breastfeeding in general, but probably especially with a newborn, so that's what I'm going to start with. I'm hoping that once we figure this out, I'll be able to breastfeed the baby while moving around the house with my son and/or doing housework. Maybe an option for you as well?

Also... look into Le Leche League. They have a book out that I read at the start of this pregnancy and it really helped to build my confidence in myself that I can breast feed this baby. They also have a webpage that has some helpful information on it.

 

[amerikiwi]

Thanks so much! I must admit I'm pretty nervous about anyone helping me. I'm very modest and have never been around breastfeeding (sad, isn't it?) I'm really shy so this is going to be me coming out of my box a bit! I'm going to register for a class this evening. Thanks again for your support

The other great thing about classes is getting to know other BF mums and hopefully starting a coffee group with them. This is also great support to get over the fear of feeding in public. When you see others feed you see how little is actually exposed. I decided to feed in public when DD was 2 weeks old just to get the first public feed out of the way. I latched her on at a cafe whilst meeting up with the other new moms from my antenatal class. I got congrats from the group for feeding as I was the first to take that step, but no comments or looks from the general public. It was smooth sailing from then.

 

[MommyMoore503]

Thanks ladies! This brings me great hope!! I'll look into those wraps. I'm so excited by all the support on this site. A lot of my questions have been answered and y'all are so kind! So So SO appreciated! Amerikiwi, I can't breastfeeding in public as it is so forgein to me. I hope I can get to that point without feeling insecure or awkward. I swear it's as if people around here haven't even seen or heard about it. The public seems to shy away from it or stare. It's crazy to think that it's not 'the norm' around here. Thanks for your support XOXO

 

[Sherileigh]

Lol, I think you can BF while moving around, probably depends on the baby, but some women have had luck doing this.

 

[aley28]

Thanks ladies! This brings me great hope!! I'll look into those wraps. I'm so excited by all the support on this site. A lot of my questions have been answered and y'all are so kind! So So SO appreciated! Amerikiwi, I can't breastfeeding in public as it is so forgein to me. I hope I can get to that point without feeling insecure or awkward. I swear it's as if people around here haven't even seen or heard about it. The public seems to shy away from it or stare. It's crazy to think that it's not 'the norm' around here. Thanks for your support XOXO

Breastfeeding while at the grocery store/out shopping is the other reason I looked into breastfeeding while wearing the baby. Most wraps/carriers cover up just about everything... I'm hoping that fixes any shyness I have.

 

[sun]

I BF my son for just under 19 months and I'm really hoping for the same this time around! We had quite a few issues in the beginning as he was early and had feeding difficulties, but we worked it out and were able to exclusively BF. That said, I am a little worried about how it will work with my son who will be 2 when the new LO arrives.
He fed every 2.5h around the clock for over a month - exhausting!! So I'm not sure how it will work with feeding that often. My son is very demanding of my attention!

But my plan is to get better at it much quicker lol! I was able to BF in a sling with my son. I have a stretchy wrap that is great for up to 5-6 months - it's called a sleepy wrap. It is similar to the moby or any other wrap-type of carrier. With my son there was a learning curve of establishing BF, then getting everything worked out in the carrier. So it didn't happen over night - it probably took 2 months before I could do it in public without fumbling around with a crying baby. So my goal is to get it together a little quicker this time around! The great thing about BF in a wrap is that no one has a clue!

Also where are you from that BF is so rare? Someone already mentioned La Leche League - they are a great resource. You could also get a lactation consultant if you have an OB - if you have a MW, they usually have tons of info. Also call the hospital you will be delivering at. The hospital my son was born at had a consultant come in and help women. I'm sure those BF ladies are there - you just need to seek them out! And also - the BF forum on BnB is great - tons of really knowledgeable people on there that have been through all sorts of issues and are very supportive!

BF can be sooooooo difficult at first, but trust me that it gets much much easier. It's just getting over that first hurdle when you are both learning and exhausted.
And I definitely agree with Sherleigh - pumping is WAY more difficult. I never would have lasted if I had to exclusively pump! xx