preference on baby's sex

[smile83]

Is it really bad that I have a preference on whay sex of the baby I would like?

I have a daughter already but I really hope that im having another girl im mentally programmed for girls im not really a boy type I have no idea what I would do with a son..Obviously I have no control over the sex of the baby and Im feeling pretty terrible that I have a secret preference so I've not told anyone how im feeling..

 

[N27murray]

I'm pregnant with my first and I am hoping for a boy. I've always wanted my oldest to be a boy probably because I have older brothers. I don't think its bad because its a natural thing we cant control.
I'm sure if you're having a boy you will naturally mother him the same as your little girl.

 

[VJean]

Don't feel bad, you aren't the only one that feels like that! I have a 15 month old DD and would love another girl just so it is easier (clothes, toys, etc). Of course I'll be fine if this baby is a boy, but I admit I'll probably be a little sad at first. I have 3 older children as well (DD 18, DS 17, DS 14), so once they are all off to college it will just be my little DD and this baby....can't help but want a girl! I'll be finding out in 2 or 3 weeks, so I'll have plenty of time to get use to the idea if this baby is a boy. And it isn't like I don't want a boy. I'd just like the convenience of a girl.....if that makes sense?

 

[kris85]

I think many people have a preference. We all know that the main thing is a happy healthy bubs but I think its very normal to want one over the other. Our first we both really wanted a girl (I'm a girly girl) and we were very disappointed to find out it was a boy. However after having him, now I couldn't imagine having a girl! like what you said, after having one you kind of feel programmed for that gender.

This one however is a girl and while I'm happy and feel blessed to have one of each deep down I would have loved a little brother for my son.. but OH is ecstatic as he's always wanted his little daddys girl lol

 

[Snow Owl]

Kris we we're the same! Very blessed to have a pink bump and one of each but to be honest I would have loved two boys.

Girls scare me!!

 

[tryfor2]

Of course you're not! You are simply being honest. I truly think most people do have some sort of gender preference but don't feel comfortable admitting it--mainly bc of people like my mother. Last pregnancy when I said I really wanted a girl she said "no you don't--you want a HEALTHY baby." Uh, actually I would like a healthy baby with a vagina." The whole "I just want a healthy baby" is the PC answer, and many do feel that way but I would bet that most deep down have a preference.

When I found out I was having a boy last time I was devastated. I know that's a word that should be reserved for finding out your child has a major birth defect or may die, but it's the truth. I sank into a bad depression for several months. People told me it wouldn't matter, that I'd love my baby no matter what the gender but I was really unsure of whether I could bond with a boy. While I didn't bond instantly (more a product of depression than gender, I think), I came to love and bond with my son more intensely than I could have imagined. Do I get a bit wistful sometimes when I see cute dresses? Sure, but so far I'm thrilled to pieces with my 20-month-old son.

I'm currently pg with my second and though I'd love a girl, I don't think I'll be disappointed with another son. Some days I worry I will be, but other days I worry I couldn't handle a girl. There are pros and cons to each. It can't matter that much as we aren't finding out till birth.

Gender is a touchy, very personal thing. But it isn't bad in the least to have a preference. It's natural and very human. I hope you get your healthy baby girl!

 

[sandilion]

DH and i would love a girl next, even though it means we will have to buy all new girly stuff since we have a DS already ... but we're not letting ourselves get carried away with the preference, as we already made one awesome boy so another one will be an amazing blessing. But i feel guilty still because of our secret preference!

 

[mel28nicole]

We both wanted a boy and it turns out bump is a girl! I didn't want to express my disappointment like my fiancé was doing but I was a little disappointed. But I'm very excited! I have a nephew who would be 14 months when I give birth and I just keep picturing them having this amazing relationship. I feel like it won't be the same having a girl. But the more I think about it, I'm getting very excited to have a girl! I think my fiancé is starting to warm up to the idea too

 

[m.knight]

I have a boy and if we have another I definitely want another boy!! I don't think I'd know what to do with a girl, I'm a boy type person.

 

[squirrel.]

I too think many people have a preference, but some admit if and others don't. There will of course be people who genuinely don't mind, but most of us have a preference I would say.

I wanted a girl the first time round. I had never had sisters (two older brothers) and had always pined for a sister. I think this longing turned into wanting a daughter as I grew up. So when I found out I was pregnant I did hope for a girl. The day we found out it was a boy I had about five minutes of quiet disappointment, but then that left me and I started imagining a beautiful little boy instead. I couldn't have been happier with my son and can't believe now that I ever wished him to be a girl. I can't imagine my life without him.

This time I had less of a desire for it to be a girl, but I did still want one. Having known how amazing boys are, I also wanted another boy. I was quite torn. As my gender scan approached I did start to want a girl more and was delighted that she is a girl, but even now I see little boy things and I feel a bit sad not to be having another gorgeous little boy. So strange!

We want three kids, but I'm secretly hoping the next is girl/boy twins to have two of each

X

 

[MummyJade]

I have a daughter so a boy next would be nice... I dont think i would be over disappointed as this is OHs 1st so win win, but I would like to give him a son as I think most men want a son at some point... x

 

[toffee87]

We're having a boy, I originally wanted a boy first. Then people convinced me I'm having a girl. So I got my head round that ha ha. I'm happy to be having a boy

 

[GemM83]

My OH is desperate for a boy, and has been extremely vocal about how disappointed he will be if it is a girl (not sure if that's to wind me up though)

I'm convinced it's a girl so think he's going to be a bit gutted tomorrow!!

 

[Unexpected212]

I really wanted a girl first time round and was a little dissapointed when they said boy. Only because I grew up around girls and had no idea what to do with a boy. So it was more fear of the unknown. It wasn't long before I loved the idea of a boy and I couldn't wait for him to be born.

This time I was hoping for a girl but after my M/C I was mostly just wanting a healthy baby. One of each was a lovely idea to experience both sides, at the same time I wanted another boy for my DH as he really wanted all boys, and also a brother would have been nice for my son

As much as I'm greatful for what I am given and to be pregnant full stop I think it's normal to have a slight preference, doesn't mean you won't be happy if you get the opposite.

 

[BigAl]

I always thought I wanted a girl, like pp didn't know what boys are about etc. But I absolutely love having a boy, he is great. I honestly don't have a pref for this one, 2 boys would be a lot easier, but then I'd never know what it's like to have a girl.
This is one of the reasons i did, and will, stay team yellow. There isn't much time to be disappointed when baby is actually here.

 

[Babybug]

I think its normal too, I always wanted another girl and when I first fell pregnant I was worried I would be dissapointed by a boy, I felt terrible but actually I am happy either way now.

Gender disappointment is a real psychological thing though, I dont know a lot about it though but some people really struggle.

As for other people's opinions I tjink most people expect you to want one of each , I usually say either would be lovely but if we had filled in an order firm wed have ticked the girl box

 

[WanaBaba]

I think it is totally normal to have a preference. I have a dd so was really hoping for a boy this time round, turns out it's another girl. I admit the first five mins or so I felt dissapointed but then started to get used to the idea and am now really happy to be having another girl!

 

[krystinab]

Well you ladies make me feel normal. My gut is telling me I'm having a boy, which I really want. SO wants a boy too, he has a 12 yo girl..She also wants a baby brother. We are staying on team yellow so I guess we have 4.5 more months to find out.

 

[WDWJess]

I think it's definitely normal to have a preference.

I've always wanted a girl as I'm so close to my mum and we are always doing girly things together even though she is 40 years older than me. I wanted to have a special bond with my own daughter in the same way. We ended up being team yellow last time coz DS was too shy at the scan but when he was born and I first discovered he was a boy there was no disappointment at all.

We have said no more after 2 so really hoping to get my daughter this time round but at the same time it would be more practical having another boy and if he's anything like our first son we will feel so utterly blessed that I don't think I'll be disappointed for long. Hopefully finding out in 4 weeks.

 

[mrsc81]

I wanted a girl first time, I was honest about that, I was over the moon when I found out we were having a girl.
This time I was torn as to what I wanted, I wanted to experience having a son, but I would of also liked to have another daughter, we are having a boy this time and I am super excited about it, I think I would of felt the same way if we were having another girl