Preparing for a baby after losses...?

[Lucy1973]

I just wanted to ask.

I was just on first tri, and there is a post about buying baby stuff really early. How lovely to have that innocence! I have no intention of going near a baby shop for quite a few months just incase. Anyone else feel like that?

When will you girls feel safe enough to start putting a nursery together etc?

 

[Mummy2Angel.]

I seen that thread as well and couldnt even look, even during my last pregnancy which ended in loss i was cautious and didnt buy anything till 12 weeks, this time i wont be going near anywhere baby related till ive passed 16 weeks, had MW appointment and heard heartbeat on her doppler, by then i'll have had 4 scans and even then i would only buy little bits, i wont be even thinking about buying the pram, nursery stuff until at least 25 weeks

I wish we could all have that innocene back, it was lovely, and it does hurt that pregnancy (especally 1st/2nd tri) probably wont ever be 'enjoyable' for most of us

 

[ettegirb21]

I read the thread, too. I would love to go out and buy a ton of baby stuff, but definitely won't. I will try to wait until after Thanksgiving or Christmas.....if I can't make it to then, than at least until I am out of the first trimester. It's very scary, and I have become very superstitous (even though I know in my heart that buying a baby outfit won't impact my pregnancy). Good luck to you.

 

[Amos2009]

I am going to buy a few little things when I get through the first trimester, but will wait to buy furniture and all that when I start my 3rd trimester. I just cant imagine having to see alot of baby things until I am close.

 

[blondee]

I waited until after the 20 week scan. I had to go in a few shops before i could actually bring myself to buy anything and then...the floodgates opened and i now have pretty much everything bar a bottle brush! All the stuff is hidden away in drawers and cupboards and i have agreed with myself that i can start organising / washing the clothes etc in a few weeks.

It is very hard, you have to go at a pace that you are comfortable with. I too found the first tri section a little to 'full on' and innocent and i felt lost until i found the PAL section! Second and third tri sections are much easier going and less intense.

X

 

[Clo]

I certainly wont be buying anything until i get past 23 weeks, when we lost Frazer. We have a lot of stuff already though that we had bought for him after our 20 week scan so dont have an awful lot to buy. X

 

[Lucy1973]

I agree, first tri isn't the best place for me right now. This is the place where people understand. I will wait until at least 20 week scan I think, maybe longer....

 

[Vickieh1981]

I have never bought before 34 weeks with my first two.

With the next two we didn't know what was going to happen because of the partial abruption. As soon as they told me I was going in for induction (at 34 and 35 weeks) we stopped and bought some clothes. Everything else we already have.

 

[mislaww]

Oh, that innocence!

In my culture it's considered very bad luck to prepare anything until after baby is born. The equivalent of a shower is held a month after birth. The traditional reason is that if the evil spirits see your preparations, they'll get jealous and act well, like evil spirits. I think that the real reason is self protection, and so it's a very good tradition!

It isn't entirely practical, but I plan on upholding that tradition as much as possible.

 

[Beanbabe]

Although I have all the big purchases I need I do not have one single item of clothing - not even a vest. After Matthew was born I decided I'm never getting pregnant again and I gave every single item of clothing my children had ever owned to a clothes drive at their play school. Nothing will be bought till well into third tri.

I'd love if i could impulse buy but I cant and I've accepted that.

I could not go into first tri either. Its to hard to see that smug innocence oozing. Second tri is not too bad but its very fast and there are so many threads its kinda impossible to keep up.

Do whatever you feel comfortable with. You know if you end up stopping on your way home from the hospital to buy a moses basket its not the end of the world. Actually babies need very little - its us mummies who like to have all the extras!!

Buying too early is a mistake anyway cos you will see something else you would rather have later on. We are very fickle. Its like christmas shopping too early - you always wish you had waited.