preparing myself...

Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive' started by miss charlie, Oct 7, 2008.

  1. miss charlie

    miss charlie 1st timester

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    As I mentioned in an earlier thread I've just started TTC, I stopped taking BCP a week ago so its all really early days yet.

    But what are people here doing or what have people done with previous babies to prepare themselves for what is going to happen to their bodies??

    Frankly I'm terrified.

    I have huge body image issues and have suffered bouts of clinical depression that have been fueled by by body problems...I'm scared that I wont be able to cope with the changes that pregnancy will bring.

    My OH is fantastic and I know he will love me whatever shape I am covered in stetchmarks or not, but I can barely stand to look at myself now let alone when I become pregnant with all the changes that brings.

    I am trying really really hard to look being pregnant as a beautiful thing but I can't, well I mean carrying and having a baby IS a beautiful thing but the way it makes your body look looks horrifying to me at times.

    Has anyone else out there felt the same?

    Is it something that is easier to come to terms with once you are actually pregnant?
     
  2. amslou

    amslou TTC No2

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    Yes you are not alone! I have these issues too, i hate myself and it makes me very depressed. Like you i have an amazingly supportive partner who says he will love me stretch marks and all. My biggest fear is to have a stomach like my mums which would make a shar-pei jealous but i have to be rational about all this and she did have twins after me and then my sister.

    I look at my friends who have had kids n you cant even tell. One of my friends wears crop tops regularly and you wouldnt even know she has had a baby she has few stretch marks and a fairly flat stomach.

    What i am currently thinking about is all the lovely maternity wear that they have out there and all the trendy stuff i can buy with the excuse of the bump and that keeps me going. ultimately though i am well aware that the outcome is well worth the stretch marks and am sure i can get past the body issues knowing i will have something wonderful to show for it.
     
  3. miss charlie

    miss charlie 1st timester

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    I dont think its helping that I have no close friends who have had children to talk to and that we're going to be getting married next october so I may end up a pg bride so I now have to completly rethink the wedding dress just in case!!
     
  4. amslou

    amslou TTC No2

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    aw well thats what the forums are for. I guess i am lucky in that respect that a fair few of my friends now have kids (actually i think i am one of the last) even my little sister is currently 7 months pg but we made our plans, we wanted to be married a while before we ttc.

    As for the wedding dress i would say its best to wait until much nearer the time to get it and try them on etc as you have wobbles anyway. you may be a little pregnant a lot pregnant or a mother by then so i would definately wait on even looking for the dress until at least march next year, but thats just me. I got mine very early and had loads of wobbles on it.
     
  5. miss charlie

    miss charlie 1st timester

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    Haha I'm not entirely certain what to do about the maid of honour wanting to go dress shopping with me next week!!

    Its kinds silly I know, in all honesty we should wait to TTC until after the wedding, I cant order a nice corsetted dress just incase...but if I leave it too late and happen to not get pg than I wont be able to get anything off the peg that I like!1

    Sods law innit??

    I guess I'm just a bit scared as i never thought I'd be TTC right now, I've only just qualified as a teacher and I'm in my NQT year and me and the OH had planned to move to Wales before having a LO...so maybe start TTC in a year.

    BUT we had a big heart to heart and he revealed how much he wanted to start trying anf I said how brrody I had been and well that was that!!

    If we hadnt already handed over a non-refundable deposit for the wedding venue then we may have thought about moving the wedding!!
     
  6. Debbie82

    Debbie82 Privileged Twin Mummy

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    I was initially like that when we talked about TTC.

    I am relatively happy with my body image now but used to be overweight and was paranoid once I got pg the weight would pile back on and would never lose it again after working so hard to lose it the first time round. Also I am already prone to stretch marks so know when I do get pg my body will be riddled with them :cry:

    However, as I am now on month 4 of TTC without joy I am becoming less and less concerned about what will happen to my body and just except as a sacrifice to be made when I am finally blessed with a child.
     
  7. miss charlie

    miss charlie 1st timester

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    Thanks...I guess I just need some reassurance that I will have more positive things to focus on!!
     
  8. amslou

    amslou TTC No2

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    Does sound to me like there are a few things you need to get straight for yourself before ttc but only you can know if the timing is right. I dont know how old you are but if you are both still young it would do no harm to wait until nearer the wedding.

    I wouldnt worry about getting a dress later. Most of them look at you funny if you go more than 6 months before and they all want you to make appointments before you go usually as well. Also they dont often order the dress to come in to the shop until about 6-8 weeks before - about the time you would start to go for fittings so there really is no ruch. The only thing i struggled with for our october wedding was underwear as by the time it came to fittings there was very little bridal underwear in the shops.
     
  9. miss charlie

    miss charlie 1st timester

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    The thing I'm having trouble with is finding a burgundy/claret colored dress that I can i) afford and ii) is nice!!

    Haha...I'm sure everything will work out its just my mind running a million miles a second because I havent been able to talk to anyone except the OH about things!


    ....edit; I'm 25 the OH is 27 BTW...

    and thanks...
     

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