QOTD: When will you tell?

[sausages]

Are you a wait til after the scan person or before the pee's dried on the stick kinda gal?

We told straight away with the first three if i remember rightly. I was far too excited to hold it in!! Then with DS i think i held out until about 8 weeks. My friends pretty much guessed straight away when i stopped drinking, but i denied it for a while.

If we are lucky enough to be pregnant again... I will probably tell my close friends straight away and hold off on my parents as long as i can. I know that sounds backwards, but our parents have forbidden us to get pregnant again. They will do nothing but worry alllllll the way through it, and the way i see it, the less time they know, they less time they will spend worrying.

It's shit, because after the first time all of the joy was stripped from a pregnancy announcement for us. At least i know my friends will be happy for me unreservedly. I wish it was different, but it's not and those are the cards i've been dealt so i have to deal with that.

In fact, it's maybe another reason not to bother. There's only me who would be genuinely happy. DH would either be surprised and then upset or otherwise he would be feeling coerced. My parents would out right tell me off. His parents probably wouldn't say much, but would be stressed about it. When did something so happy and lovely turn into something so potentially miserable?

Anyway, under normal circumstances i would tell everyone right away and have that excitement for as long as i could. No one knows how long a pregnancy is going to last and just because you see a heartbeat doesn't mean you will get to take that baby home. When something is so precarious why deny yourself any joy from it at all. Celebrate soon and with everyone. If it all goes pear shaped, those are the memories you will cherish.

 

[sausages]

Got a bit gloomy there didn't i? Well, sorry about that. I'm feeling that way out today! :/

 

[LoolaBear]

as the next will be the last I am going to try and hold out for as long as possible as i think i will want the whole baby idea to be in my own little bubble for as long as i can keep it in.

With my youngest my family knew around 8 weeks and then i announced to everyone else around 17/18 weeks as i was having extra tests done due to the loss i suffered before having her. after i got the all clear i felt safe telling people outside my little circle.

with the next i am going to try and hold out until after my 20 week scan so i can post a picture of my bump with a pink or blue ribbon and a little announcment board saying 'Coming soon in 2014'

 

[Rachie004]

I'd have to tell work straight away but after that it would be after I had scans and we'd know that everything is as good as it could be.

I can't imagine telling my mum, ever, that I'm pregnant so maybe when the baby is 6 months old then perhaps I could mention it then?

 

[katherinegrey]

With my next pregnancy I will do the same as I did with my first pregnancy and tell people after my twelve week scan, I might even hold off longer with my next pregnancy, it'd be nice to know gender before I announce it

 

[LoolaBear]

I'd have to tell work straight away but after that it would be after I had scans and we'd know that everything is as good as it could be.

I can't imagine telling my mum, ever, that I'm pregnant so maybe when the baby is 6 months old then perhaps I could mention it then?

when the baby's 6 months old i like that.

normally i would have to tell work straight away but even if i was to miraculously fall pregnant tomorrow the baby would be due after my redundancy date so it wouldnt matter too much not telling them until later as i won't need to apply for maternity leave. i work in an office so not much health and safety requirments and i can work extra flexi hours to have time off for appointments to hide it.

knowing my luck though with all my ideas and plans i will probably balloon as soon as inplantation takes place so it will be impossible to hide.

 

[sarahfh]

I think I would tell my best friend straight away. To be honest with the hours OH works I will probably end up telling her before OH!
Then I will wait until I've had a scan and some definite morning sickness/heard the heartbeat a few times before telling family.
Then things like work I'm not sure about, I think it will depend on things like if I get bad morning sickness. I work for my local council in their contact centre on the phones, so I can't just be running off to be sick at the exact moment I need to unfortunately.
For the wider announcements like friends and Facebook then I will wait untl just after the 12 week scan

 

[xLeeBeex]

It all depends what OH wants to do or if I have morning sickness I guess. If I get that then we'd have to tell our parents and my grandparents then as I visit them a lot and they'd notice. However, if I don't get that and can hide it for a while, i'd hope to tell them around 10-11 weeks, so that its not too long to wait for the scan then... Everyone else can know after the 12 week scan

 

[lozzy21]

I need to tell work straight away as I cannot work there so will probably tell close friends and family straight away and tell every one else after the 12 week scan.

 

[Button#]

Last time I wanted to wait until my scan but ended up telling parents and some work colleagues before then.

 

[angiepie]

I will probably tell a friend or 2 right away. Everyone else, wait as long as possible!! At least 12 weeks, hopefully longer if I'm not showing. I want to wait til I 'know' I'm keeping the baby and less likely to MC. I may or may not choose to have an early scan (might just have one at 20 weeks, haven't decided yet) but I'll at least want to hear a heartbeat on the doppler beforehand, if not the scan. This is because I know my family thinks we're too young and unprepared (we're not married yet and are only planning on buying a house once I'm pregnant) and my sister is 25 and still living with them, so there's no way they'll expect me, at 22, to get pregnant. I know they'll come around, but I'm dreading telling them as I know they'll be shocked and there'll probably be some disapproval at first and bitching behind my back (can count on my mom and sister for that lol). If I'm sick in 1st tri I will tell work, otherwise wait for that as well.

 

[Kians_Mummy]

Only people I will be telling is my OH & boss (need to have a risk assessment) at first. We're playing with the idea of not telling people until 16 weeks & having a baby bond gender scan then telling family buy it all.depends when I start showing as when was 14 weeks with DS i had a bump!

 

[Reidfidleir]

I would do it differently next time. I would probably tell people right away. It was so hard keeping it to myself for 13 weeks and even harder for my husband. Now we did tell some close family including the parents at 6 weeks but he wanted everybody's support and joy and waiting so long we felt a little deprived of that.
I've never had a mc so I don't have that fear this time but if it did happen then I'm sure that it would help to have people know and have comfort from them. If no one knows nobody can help right?

 

[wombat1]

I'd probably tell my close friend here (obviously I'd tell my partner first), but I think I would want to hold off on telling my parents/family until at least 12 weeks. I'd like to have time to prepare my own mind about everything happening before all the advice descends upon me. I love my mum and I'm sure much of her advice will be really useful but I know she will get overexcited and ask me a billion questions/tell me a billion things, and I tend to be a pessimist anyway and will have in the back of my mind that something could go wrong, so I don't need someone adding to that. I live in a different country to my family too and don't really like telling big news online or over the phone and living far away just makes me feel differently about when I want them updated on big events in my life. However if my partner can't keep it a secret from his parents I'll have to tell mine for fairness. He's scared of telling them anyway as they think we are "too young for responsibility". They said just that when we got a cat, and the age my partner was when we got our cat was the same age his mam was when she had him! He worked out that when we have our first he will definitely be older than his dad when he was born so they can't tell him off!

 

[missmolly6]

I will tell parents & close friends (who would figure it out anyway). But not public until after 1st trimester.

 

[mara16jade]

I'll tell my Soon-To-Be-DH immediately (we may even find out together). And for our parents, I really really want to try and hold out until the first scan. Even if its a 6 week scan that shows a little blob! lol We have these little "Grandchildren" albums we are going to give them and that's how we're going to tell them.

We'll tell our sisters at the same time as our parents, and then everyone else can wait until after the 1st trimester.

 

[itsnowmyturn]

I will tell ppl when an opportunity comes up where I can make it creative so if I'm 4 weeks pregnant at Christmas I will tell ppl then. I have no specific order to tell ppl I don't mind if parents no first or not, I will have to tell work first so they can put extra precautions in place to protect me from miscarriage etc, other than that I will just do it whenever.
I no I will have to tell someone immediately so probably text one of my friends straight away to get it out of my system

 

[mara16jade]

I will have to tell work first so they can put extra precautions in place to protect me from miscarriage etc, other than that I will just do it whenever.

I'm just curious - what do you do for a living?

 

[itsnowmyturn]

Will be health care assistant in mental health hospital so at risk of attacks, won't be allowed to do any manual handling either

 

[Teilana]

I would have to tell work early on as I do a lot of manual lifting and walking/standing. DH will be the first to know, then doctors office. We will try to hold off on parents until at least after the first scan, but his will probably figure it out quick. His mom has this unnatural ability to know before the mom to be even knows. After the first scan for sure is when we will tell the world