Questioning myself alot lately.

Discussion in 'Postnatal Support' started by Serene123, Oct 8, 2008.

  1. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    Since having Caitlyn I had so much faith in my motherly instincts. I took advice and did what I saw best. However, lately, since me and Rich broke up, I have been questioning myself all the time. Even about little things like whether tapping her bum to get her to sleep is a bad habit, and if she's going to hate me forever because I let her cry for 5minutes to do something I needed to get done. Deep down I know I'm a wonderful mum and I have a really happy little baby girl. I also know I do what I feel best, and that's all that I can do. I don't know why I'm doing it...

    :(
     
  2. oOKayOo

    oOKayOo Well-Known Member

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    I dont know what mother doesnt hun.
    Honestly , everybody wants to be the best to there little one , and there will always be something in the back of our minds saying 'Is this right or not'
    I still do it with Ella ;) :hugs:
     
  3. isil

    isil Well-Known Member

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    Try not to let the break up with Rich impact on you and your instincts like this. You always seem very strong and like you have faith in your instincts about what's best for Caitlyn - it'd be such a shame if you lost that.
     
  4. hsollis

    hsollis Well-Known Member

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    Trust your instincts! You're probably just doubting as you've broken up with your OH that you can't trust them as it didn't work out...

    Take it one day at a time and focus on the little one and go forward as best as possible but remember, that your LO trusts you and so, you should trust yourself as well...

    :) It'll probably take some time to get adjusted but remember you are doing well and are a great mother!!!
     
  5. reallytinyamy

    reallytinyamy Mum and step mum

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    Toria, you are one of the people that I always hope will reply to my posts. You always give good advice (even if I dont always take it) and you obviously love Caitlyn very much and have her best interests at heart.

    Your confidence has taken a knock and you're bound to feel down and confussed, about everything not just Rich. Its a natrual reaction, I should imagine you life has suddenly completely changed not to mention your emotions.

    You and Caitlyn will be just fine, you will adjust and even if you are doubting yourself at the moment, your subconcious knows exactly what its doing.
     
  6. AppleBlossom

    AppleBlossom Guest

    You are a wonderful mum and I have no doubt Caitlyn loves you to pieces. I'm the same with Grace and I know I'm a good mum. You can't hold on to her all day or you'd never get anything done and as for patting her bum, if it helps her sleep then do it. I pat Grace and I leave her whinging when I need to get something done. It doesn't make you a bad mum. Obviously your break up is going to cause you to have doubts about yourself but trust me, and I'm sure everyone else on here, when we say you have nothing to doubt yourself about :hugs:
     
  7. Donna79x

    Donna79x Mummy to Rihanna Paige x

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    Toria you are a fab mum n full of great advice..... please have faith in your instincts....

    I am sure they are very few new mums out there that dont have moments like this... i do too hun xxxx
     
  8. nikky0907

    nikky0907 Well-Known Member

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    :hugs:

    You feel you're a wonderful mom because you are.
    Moms have worries,it's what we do and who we are.

    You're suddenly single and no doubt it hit you hard but it has nothing to do with what you're like as a mother.
     
  9. x-amy-x

    x-amy-x Mammy

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    Don't doubt your ability to do right by your girl. You have no reason to. You're a great mum, don't convince yourself otherwise.

    :hugs:
     
  10. alyxzandra

    alyxzandra Mom to Sebastian

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    Agh, well, if bum tapping makes one a bad mother then I am a bad mother too. in fact, I call it playing the bum drums. And I let my son cry until I can get things sorted. Trust your instincts. Nature gave them to you for a reason.
     
  11. Tezzy

    Tezzy Mum of 2 TTCAL

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    huge hugs babe xx
     
  12. Younglutonmum

    Younglutonmum Mummy To Maya & Bump

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    Awww Toria, you are truely a fab mum & like ReallyTinyAmy said, I always hope you reply to my threads

    Splitting with Rich has probably got you doubting alot of things at the moment but in time you'll be used to it :D
     
  13. Samantha675

    Samantha675 Maybe baby #3?!?

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    No matter love, we all question ourselves to some extent. I think that the break up has obviously thrown you a bit of curve. Just try to keep that in persective and remember it has nothing to do with being a good mother!
     
  14. ryder

    ryder Mum to Jasmine & Peyton

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    Dont be hard on yourself! You really sound like you just want whats best for your little girl...

    Being a mom is hard work and there are going to be lots of hard times... Letting her cry for a couple minutes and not rushing to her every time is something that is eventually going to happen. It is a natural process in weaning.

    This is an experience for you, everything (baby, rich etc) and you will learn something from every mistake (I dont mean mistake literally in a bad way) and next time your in a relationship you will have something to reflect on. And when you decide to have another baby one day you will have all your experiences with Caitlin to reflect on.
     
  15. Charlotte-j

    Charlotte-j Mum of 2.

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    dont think of yourself as a bad mum, from every post that i have read from u, and seen pics of Caitlyn you an amazing mother
    she always looks very happy, and healthy and very loved :) so dont doubt your self :)
    :hugs:
     

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