I'm 19, and i'm not a parent so take my opinion as you will... but...
I think that 10.30pm is actually quite a reasonable time and at 14, I had to come home quite a bit earlier than that. Infact, at 14 I actually had to be in bed by that time! Some of my friends did have later curfews so at the time I got embarrassed sometimes, but I coped just fine and i've found now that most of my friends with the late curfews are the ones that have gone off the rails. I'm now glad my parents had me in at that time!
Even at 17, I had to be in by that time unless I was at either my best friend's house who literally lived four doors away or my other friend's house (male and we're now engaged and living together) who was literally just around the corner and down the street. But, he was older (20) and walked me home and my parents knew his parents quite well and knew that they wouldn't have been allowing us to drink, have sex etc
On a school night I was never allowed out past 10pm.
The only exceptions where I might have been allowed to stay out that late at 14 were if I was sleeping at a friend's house but my parents knew my friend's parents quite well and the friends' houses I slept at all had similar rules/curfews so my parents knew they were as responsible if you know what I mean? I don't recall ever going to parties that late at that age with the exception of like family parties...