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Scared about giving birth?

xsugarplumx

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Is anyone else who is WTT (For me it's less than a week now, so excited) just absolutely TERRIFIED of giving birth when that big day comes? I've been reading stories on here and other forums and I just get weak and naseous and thinking, "How the F**K am I going to do that?!" I barely can get a needle stuck in my arm without crying obnoxiously and having my husband hold my hand.

I want a baby so bad, but I'm so scared about giving birth - oh and don't get me started about a C section. I almost cried reading one story it scared me so much.

Please tell me I'm not the only one!!
 
I'm terrified....scared shitless. For some reason c-section doesn't scare me. If I have the choice that is what I'm getting.

My sister had a c-section when she had my nephews (twins!!) so it helps that I've seen the process. Plus I can't stop thinking...."if she can do it, so can I!"
 
I've heard horror stories where they have to get the baby out pronto and don't have time to numb you up so you feel every little thing, and OMG, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
 
I was terrified of giving birth. I grew up saying I was going to adopt because I couldn't stand the thought of labor. My fear of needles didn't help either. When my OB told me he was sending me to the hospital to be induced at my 41 week appointment I had a nervous break down and it took me hours to calm down before I could make the drive.

Having been there and done it, I can say I made it faaaar scarier in my head than what it turned out to be. By the time I asked for the epidual I didn't give a damn about the needle, I just wanted it in and the pain gone! :haha: I ended up loving my experience, and can't wait to do it again!

And I wanted a c-section until my coworker told me about them piling her organs on her chest during hers (her husband watched). After that I was quite happy to have my vaginal birth!
 
I am terrified too! Having had two miscarriages, both of which were physically excruciatingly painful, I can't imagine the pain that full blown labour causes. I was literally rolling around, being sick and screaming!
With both my pregnancies, one of my initial thoughts was "oh crap, I have to give birth" and I honestly am petrified. I have a friend who miscarried then gave birth and said that they are equally painful but the birth doesn't seem so bad because there is a positive outcome - I am hoping I feel the same!
 
I'm so scared of a miscarriage, birth, everything. I literally get weak in my body when I read about it. But at the sane time; I get excited. I'm so messed up lol
 
What exactly is it your scared of? There has been research out that's shows a fear of labour can make your labour longer and hurt more. It's all psychological, you think it's going to hurt then it will hurt.

I wasn't scared, I just saw it as a natural think and I got to 9cm before I realised I was in labour, only went to the hospital because my waters had gone and see had pood. It was intense but not painfull, the most painfull thing about labour was the cramp I got in my leg!
 
The thought process is far scarier than the actual labour it self. I am such a wimp and cry if i stub my toe, but labour with my DD was fine..

Yes of course it is a bit painful, but not as bad as i ever imagined. It turned out i needed a c-section in the end and have in total now had 3.. And it cant of been that bad as we are now trying for another, meaning c-section number 4 for me. x
 
I know what you mean I'm not so scared of the labour pains, more so the actual crowning and poping the head out!!
I don't know if it would make it better or worse for you, but I found watching one born every minute really helpful - a full range of births and it took all the 'myth' out of the process! I think knowing what's going to be happening, and seeing it through from initial labour starting to baby being placed in mums arms really helped me to understand and relax about it a bit (though will prob still be a little scared until I'm in it - I'm far better at dealing with a situation once I'm in it instead of winding myself up and getting myself all stressed out thinking about it beforehand!!)
 
I'm scared of the actual birth. Pushing, crowning, tearing of vag, etc.
 
Although I feel like I have quite a low pain threshold it isn't the pain of giving birth that scares me. I'm far more concerned about having a miscarriage or issues during pregnancy. The thing that actually worries me the most is not even being able to conceive although I don't think I have any reason to actually worry.

People only seem to share the horror stories about giving birth when there are plenty of women out there who have no complications whatsoever and can manage the pain well. I do agree that a lot of the pain can by psychological so if and when I get pregnant I'm going to try not to worry about the birth. Once it's in there it's got to come out somehow! :haha: In my opinion, becoming a mum for the rest of my life far outweighs the fear of giving birth.
 
Of course the pain outweighs it, I'm just kind of worried that.. and excuse the morbidness.. that I might god forbid die during delivery and have DH to care for this baby who caused me death, eternally making DH to hate the baby, which I wouldn't want.. I am so afraid of that.. I haven't even told him this. .
 
Trust me, that bit is the easy bit. It actually comes as a bit of a relief as you feel like your actively doing something. As for tearing of your in a good position and listen to your body and not some one else then you should not tear
 
I'm just so worried, about EVERYTHING and I'm not even pregnant.
 
I'm not worried about labour and giving birth. It's something women have been doing for ever, and we as a species have survived it. I've seen quite a few deliveries now, and delivered quite a few babies, and none of them have been horrific. OK, some women I have looked after in labour have ended up with instrumental deliveries or sections, but often they were the women who screamed and screamed instead of pushed, or who wouldn't get up off their backs for the whole labour. I've delivered a few women who came in and had the baby within half an hour of getting on to labour ward.

Sugarplum, there is a chance you will tear, but small tears are normal. Antenatal massage of the perineum can help reduce the risk of tearing. And the risk of dying, well, that's so tiny it's not even worth worrying about.
 
I mean.. you girls don't understand my pain threshold is close to none. Even THINKING about a tear makes me queasy! I do want to give birth, I'm just timid
 
I really don't like the idea of tearing, either, but you'll have your lovely little baby in your arms at the end of it all, and surely that will make it all worth it.

And if you are terrified of the pain, there are pain relief options. There are the usual drugs - though these can affect baby or make it more difficult for you to labour/push etc. But there are other options, like a birth pool, TENS machine or even things like hypnobirthing, which are all meant to help with the pain (to be honest, I have never seen any of these, but only because most of my deliveries have been on the consultant unit where everything tends to be medicalised).

Even labouring at home should reduced your stress hormones, which will make you more relaxed and will allow you to labour better.
 
I thought I would be, but I've spoken with so many women who've had natural births and home births, equally some of those women had horrendous hospital births, that the only thing I'm bothered about is having to birth in hospital as I think that will be more traumatic. I think a woman's body knows what to do - we've been doing it forever! It's only since a century ago we lost faith in our power and rely on males in white coats to dictate what we do. So mainly, I'm scared of having to rely on pain meds and have the natural speed of progression taken out of my hands, rather than the pain of childbirth. :)
 
After having spoken to friends i'd far rather labour at home and wait untill my waters broke before going to hospital and keeping as active as possible during labour (tho weither hubby will let me get that far is another question as were a 30min drive from our nearest hospital!!)
Both my closest friends who had babies stayed at home till their waters broke and then went in and had very quick deliveries after that all with just gas and air.
I hope mine eventually will be as straightforward.

Sugar plum i wonder if for you it might be helpful to see a hypnotherapist to help you to get past your fear before you fall pregnant. (my husband who is very cynical of all those type treatments found it very helpful for something he was struggling with) as i would be concerned that the stress you would feel about the impending pregnancy and birth would not help you to fall pregnant in the 1st instance and then during pregnancy could be bad for you and baby!! (hope i'm not overstepping the mark by saying that? :-\ )
 

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