Scared about giving birth?

[BigLegEmma]

^ Hehe that often comes to mind when I start thinking about labour; I look around at random strangers pushing infants in strollers and think "She did it!" and "She managed to do it, too!"

 

[mandaa1220]

I'm actually excited to give birth. It's such a HUGE moment in your life and I can't wait for that moment where the baby is finally out and you feel so relieved and alive. I am; however, petrified of having to get an epidural or a C-Section. I know that it is realistic that I could end up needing both, but I'm not a fan of them.

 

[LockandKey]

the best thing about labor pains is that it's only temporary, and they do have meds to help with that, and during the pushing stage, your adrenaline is so high and it goes by so quick that you don't have time to worry about or focus on the pain. My first birth experience with DD was rough, but I was in a crap hospital, so that's to be expected, my birth experience with DS was amazing, despite being in unmedicated labor for over 36 hours, I pushed at my own pace, rested when I needed to, and my midwife I had for DS had helped keep me from tearing, so recovery was really quick and practically painless. From experience, I can definitely say that the birth of your child will be the most amazing, and quickest day of your life. Seriously, from start to finish, it goes by in the blink of an eye that you barely remember the pain.

I think the health providers, the support you have, and the environment you give birth in makes a huge difference between a good experience and a bad one, so if you are worried about it, do plenty of online research before getting pregnant and look for hospitals with low C section rates, low intervention rates, or OB/Midwives with very good reviews from their patients.

The best thing you can do, with everything concerning pregnancy, is try and stay calm, stress and worry only makes things worse, and if you have questions for your provider, ask away, anything and everything you can think of, even if you think it might be silly, just ask, as long as it will help ease your worry.

 

[MamaByrd]

I'm actually excited, oddly enough. I feel like you're truly doing what your body is made to do. The strength that you feel, along with the pain, is said to be one of the most rewarding experiences. Especially because you get a beautiful baby at the end!

If you haven't seen it, I suggest you watch, "The Business Of Being Born". I know it opened my eyes!

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

I mean.. you girls don't understand my pain threshold is close to none. Even THINKING about a tear makes me queasy! I do want to give birth, I'm just timid

There are several pain relief options that you should research then to help you feel better then. I loved my epidural, it took all of the pain away and I didn't feel anything again until after I pushed her out. I didn't even know she was crowning until my hubby mentioned it! I also second the person that mentioned watching videos, so you have an idea of what does happen.

Besides, when the time comes you don't have much of an option... baby has to come out one way or another. That's what I kept telling myself when I had to go in for my birth.

 

[spicyorange]

This is what Epidurals are for! I don't want one but then I'm not scared (yet) but someone said to me, you would never have a tooth out or gall stones removed without aesthetic so why have a baby that way...there's nothing to prove and no pain relief doesn't make you a better mum.

 

[BeachyFeelin]

i've heard horror stories where they have to get the baby out pronto and don't have time to numb you up so you feel every little thing, and omg, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

omg omg omg!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[BeachyFeelin]

I find myself more scared of the Epidural needle (heard they hurt like no other) then I am of giving birth. Which is weird because I don't mind shots, and I have tattoos...so you'd think I would be ok around needles!

Also - I don't want to poop on the table...do you really poop???

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

I find myself more scared of the Epidural needle (heard they hurt like no other) then I am of giving birth. Which is weird because I don't mind shots, and I have tattoos...so you'd think I would be ok around needles!

Also - I don't want to poop on the table...do you really poop???

I pooped twice - I didn't care, I just wanted her out! The nurse just swapped out the mat both times and told me it's natural and to keep pushing. Hubby just told me what a great job I was doing (he found the whole thing amazing and beautiful to watch). In the end, that was probably the least gross thing that came out of my body by the time it was over!

I didn't feel the epidural at all. They did a numbing shot which felt like a small pinch. After that sweet nothing! Which was such a relief after several hours of painful contractions. The IV hurt worse going in!

 

[MamaByrd]

In my opinion, going to a hospital, having an epidural, c-sections, etc sounds terrifying!!!!!

The way I planned to do it (unmedicated home water birth) sounds actually pretty peaceful.. Maybe look into different options?

 

[BigLegEmma]

In my opinion, going to a hospital, having an epidural, c-sections, etc sounds terrifying!!!!!

The way I planned to do it (unmedicated home water birth) sounds actually pretty peaceful.. Maybe look into different options?

That's my plan, too.

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

In my opinion, going to a hospital, having an epidural, c-sections, etc sounds terrifying!!!!!

The way I planned to do it (unmedicated home water birth) sounds actually pretty peaceful.. Maybe look into different options?

It wasn't an option for me; my mother almost died after she gave birth to me (massive hemorrhage with no warning), and the only reason she's still alive is because of the doctor that was attending her and the swift action he took. I know it's a rare complication, but giving birth in a hospital surrounded by trained medical professionals made me feel so much better in case something did happen.

I hope you get the birth experience you want!

 

[xsugarplumx]

After having spoken to friends i'd far rather labour at home and wait untill my waters broke before going to hospital and keeping as active as possible during labour (tho weither hubby will let me get that far is another question as were a 30min drive from our nearest hospital!!)
Both my closest friends who had babies stayed at home till their waters broke and then went in and had very quick deliveries after that all with just gas and air.
I hope mine eventually will be as straightforward.

Sugar plum i wonder if for you it might be helpful to see a hypnotherapist to help you to get past your fear before you fall pregnant. (my husband who is very cynical of all those type treatments found it very helpful for something he was struggling with) as i would be concerned that the stress you would feel about the impending pregnancy and birth would not help you to fall pregnant in the 1st instance and then during pregnancy could be bad for you and baby!! (hope i'm not overstepping the mark by saying that? :-\ )

You are not overstepping at all! I'm very young, and it will be my first. Hubby calms me down, and I talk to friends about it, I just have these thoughts in the back of my head. I mean obviously I'm not too scared. I think I'm just making it up in my head.

 

[Caite]

This is what Epidurals are for! I don't want one but then I'm not scared (yet) but someone said to me, you would never have a tooth out or gall stones removed without aesthetic so why have a baby that way...there's nothing to prove and no pain relief doesn't make you a better mum.

To me, they're not even comparable. Having a baby is a natural thing to do; women have been doing it forever without epidurals or even other forms of pain relief. Having a tooth out or gall stones removed is not natural.

Personally, I don't think I could ever have an epidural (the thought of it actually terrifies me) - and I know that that could all change, but right now, I could never see myself having one. But, if other women want epidurals, I think that that is their choice, and I wouldn't judge them for it.

 

[schmetterling]

I haven't read through all of the responses yet, but I just wanted to offer some support and tell you that I think the best way to get over the fear is through education! Read as much as you can about childbirth. Any one of Ina May's books are excellent and her Guide to Childbirth book contains a collection of beautiful, peaceful, natural childbirth stories. Watch documentaries if you like that kind of thing. Attend childbirth classes when the time comes. Honestly, birth is unlike any pain you're used to because it has a purpose. And the hormones you release help your body handle the intensity. I wouldn't consider my labor painful, just intense! I had a natural birth and absolutely cannot wait to do it again! But however you give birth, just trust in your body to do what it was made to do and you can have an amazing experience!

 

[xsugarplumx]

I heard the first pee you take after you give birth is horrendous. I also heard you get shakes and stuff afterwards. True?

 

[MellyH]

I agree with Manda and MamaByrd - I actually excited! Everyone is so proud of women for giving birth, I want to get to have that moment. I want my husband to be proud of me. I can't wait to be proud of myself!

 

[LockandKey]

the first pee? Hahaha, NO, it's the first sh*t you need to worry about, but if you take some stool softener beforehand, it's not that bad. And yes, you do get the shakes, it happens while in labor right before you push during a stage called "transition," it's more annoying than anything, but it's because the hormone levels are extremely high at that point that your body is basically on overload. After the birth, it's because of the hormones coming back down, plus blood loss that may make you shake, but only a few hours after birth you should be completely fine. I was able to walk normally without help only 4 hours after both my children's birth.

 

[xsugarplumx]

the first pee? Hahaha, NO, it's the first sh*t you need to worry about, but if you take some stool softener beforehand, it's not that bad. And yes, you do get the shakes, it happens while in labor right before you push during a stage called "transition," it's more annoying than anything, but it's because the hormone levels are extremely high at that point that your body is basically on overload. After the birth, it's because of the hormones coming back down, plus blood loss that may make you shake, but only a few hours after birth you should be completely fine. I was able to walk normally without help only 4 hours after both my children's birth.

That actually helped calm my nerves.. thank you so much girls for this.. I feel so much more better and at ease about giving birth.

 

[I Love Lucy]

I think we make labor out to be scarier then what actually is. I loved giving birth to my DS and it's what I'm most looking forward to when I get pregnant with baby #2. Plus during the actual act of giving birth, needles, tearing, etc. is the last thing you're thinking about.