Scared To Suggest Co-Sleeping

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Lightworker, Jun 1, 2011.

  1. Lightworker

    Lightworker Well-Known Member

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    I have a friend who just had a baby and she's going through the typical "my baby won't be put down" phase. I am a huge believer in co-sleeping but for some reason - am terrified of suggesting it incase anything goes wrong and I'll feel guilty. Even when I KNOW it will make everything better, I'm still afraid lol. Anyone else the same?
     
  2. KayBea

    KayBea Mummy to Xanthia Lily

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    Yes im the same.. Ide bever suggest it but drop a hint maybe, say something like 'my LO was like that and i tried co-sleeping, it worked really well for us'..
    Xx
     
  3. anna matronic

    anna matronic Mummy to Evan :-)

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    Could you direct her to a website or something with all the advice so she can be well informed and make a choice? There is no harm in suggesting it and I do understand why you feel like that though x
     
  4. shimmy

    shimmy mummy , daddy and baby

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    I would probably do this too x
     
  5. aliss

    aliss Well-Known Member

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    Maybe, as a gift, offer her the Dr Sears Baby Sleep book and she can make her own decision from there. Even if she chooses not to co-sleep, it will still be helpful :)
     
  6. tu123

    tu123 Well-Known Member

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    Well said.

    I once suggested it to someone and got alot of evil stares from my mum and baby group!
     
  7. aragornlover8

    aragornlover8 Well-Known Member

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    The idea of the book is great imo. I totally understand your apprehension and would likely feel the same
     
  8. jojo_b

    jojo_b Well-Known Member

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    Yeh I understand. I would never want to suggest something that isn't currently recommended. I FF, but would never recommend it. I would just tell your friend your experiences and let her make her own mind up. She will do what's best for her baby. We haven't co-slept and wouldn't - it's just not for us, but I see why others would x x
     
  9. Lightworker

    Lightworker Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for the responses ladies. I said "I noticed both my children were like this and I slept with both of them and it really improved things for us." I then asked her if she read the UNICEF leaflet on BFing and co-sleeping in her new birth pack, but she said she didn't have one. I then said "well co-sleeping is a very personal choice that you have to be comfy with, but if you want, check on google about doing it safely as there are guidelines and see if it suits you."
     
  10. Lightworker

    Lightworker Well-Known Member

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    I like the idea of sending her a book, and I am keen on Dr Sears so I might send her the complete baby book (although its huge and heavy and will cost loads to post lol!)
    ETA: doh I could buy it off Amazon and have it delivered at hers right?
     
  11. moomin_troll

    moomin_troll mummy to zane and corey

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    i loved co sleeping with zane, im going to try and stop myself from doing it this time as i dont trust zane running into my room in the morning and landing on corey :S

    ive always told people who say they are having trouble that i co slept with zane and he slept really well with it and i had no problems with him when he went into his cot.
     
  12. cissyhope

    cissyhope Pregnant with no 2

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    just wanted to ask- Do you pop your lo in their cot (if they are older) till you go to bed? i co sleeped a bit at the beginning but then started combi feeding and i dont know why i carried on :shrug: i do feel guilty now as i now know how good it is for them :nope: My Lo does sleep in his own room now cause we cant fit his cot in our room (this has only been for the last month and he was in his moses basket by me before that) he sleeps quite well but still wakes up a couple of times,hungry,which i dont mind. x im not sure whether to start to co sleep again? and is it too late? x
     
  13. aliss

    aliss Well-Known Member

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    Baby Book or Sleep Book, I love them & own them both ;) That would be a fantastic gift for her.
     
  14. moomin_troll

    moomin_troll mummy to zane and corey

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    its never too late to start again if u want to do it. zane was 6 months when he went into his cot full time because he didnt want to co sleep anymore...and still woke during the night :/
    but when i started him with a bedtime routine he went into my bed by himself to sleep, hed be in the middle with pillows at his sides just incase he moved which he never did.
    u cud look into getting a bed guard for the sides of ur bed
     
  15. Lightworker

    Lightworker Well-Known Member

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    Cissyhope- bedguards are good if you want him to go up earlier. I let LO sleep on me and then go up when I am ready. X
     
  16. bky

    bky :(

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    Certainly give her information on doing it safely. If my antenatal instructor hadn't given us a tutorial on how to do it safely (as she said, your baby WILL end up in your bed at some point. Here is how to be safe about it because it's a lot safer than passing out on the sofa) I would have been unsafely doing it on the sofa out of exhaustion.
     
  17. Reid

    Reid mom of 1

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    glad i came across this as in the morning after juniors feed i tend 2 lift him in2 bed with me or he sumtimes has a grumpy few hours at night and the only way he will calm and go 2 sleep when hes like this is when hes cuddled up with mummy and even then it takes time i didnt say 2 any of the health visitors in fear of getting in2 bother like a silly little school girl (28 btw) but i must admit i love this time when were both cuddled up in bed i dont feel so bad about bringing him in next 2 me now :)) xx
     
  18. littlestar85

    littlestar85 Wife and mother

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    I'm exactly the same. I have a friend who I've kind of recommended it too but haven't given it 100% cos she had a relative who did lose a baby co-sleeping so I know she's very nervous about it. I feel it would help her LO who HATES to be put down but don't want her to think I think she's doing something wrong by not co-sleeping iykwim. x
     
  19. amy19604

    amy19604 Well-Known Member

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    i would probably suggest that i do it and it works for us. i co sleep and most of the time when ive mentioned it to people they look really shocked like im doing something really dangerous, so i tend not to talk about it unless someone asks. but i think its great and really helps baby sleep. my lo is sleeping through the night now, im sure if i put him in a cot he would keep waking.
    i keep him downstairs with me until i go to bed, but he falls asleep on the sofa and always falls asleep alone (as in he doesnt need anything to help him drop off) i just sit beside him x
     
  20. Mum2b_Claire

    Mum2b_Claire Mummy to Ruby & Scarlett!

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    Yeah, definitely focus on giving her the info that it IS possible to do it safely and it's not 'not recommended'. For me, I think it's normal for babies to sleep with their mothers.
     

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