Second early scan, should have been 8+3, but no heartbeat

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by smidgen, Dec 15, 2009.

  1. smidgen

    smidgen Mummy 2 Finlay & 4 angels

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    Hi Ladies

    Just a quick message to say I won't be around for a while - had a second scan yesterday as wasn't feeling to good at the weekend - abdo/back pain with some brown spotting. Internal scan showed my baby had died, they tried for ages to try and find a heartbeat but nothing and the walls of the sac had started to cave in and it was a funny shape. They think the baby died not long after I had my first scan at 6+5 weeks.. So they have sent me home with my dead baby inside and said to come back in on Thur for a D & C if it doesn't start to come away naturally!! I am going off my head with all sorts of thoughts.. it's so horrible knowing that i am walking about with dead baby still inside but on the other hand I worry that they are wrong and that they will kill my baby on Thur if the sonographer just couldnt manage to get a heartbeat - do you think they will scan me on Thur to confirm before they go ahead and do the D & C??

    Life sucks - that's 3 :angel::angel::angel:babies I've lost now - just don't know how to carry on....
     
  2. Viz1975

    Viz1975 Well-Known Member

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    So sorry to hear this I would ask for a scan on Thursday just to make sure if possible - thoughts are with you and OH

    xxx
     
  3. ProudMum

    ProudMum Well-Known Member

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    im so so sorry for your loss...
    i also find it appalling that you were sent away...
    i find it heartless that hospitals can send away a grieving mother and tell them to come back days later :(
    xxxx
     
  4. scoobylyn66

    scoobylyn66 Well-Known Member

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    I would ask for a scan before comitting to a D&C. I had the same at 13 weeks and they said they would scan me in 10 days. I miscarried on my own at the weekend.

    I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.
     
  5. moonlady12

    moonlady12 mum to 5 wonderful kids

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    i really feel for you i suffered 2 mmc before i had my last daughter,it does seem unfair at the time but look at this way the baby may have had something wrong with it now would you really have liked to bring it into the world disabled because you wanted a baby,i know seems harsh but being hard was the only way that got me through what you will go through in the nx couple of days,i also named my babies so that it was easier to grieve and move on,believe me it will feel better and you will go on to have a normal healthy pregnancy in time.
    i have 6 children 4 living though but will never forget my sam and ashley.

    :hugs::kiss:
     
  6. nineena

    nineena mummy to a gorgeous girl

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    Oh hunny i am so very sorry but i would deffo request a scan before they do any procedure's just to be sure sending oodles of hugs xxxx
     
  7. carrieanne

    carrieanne Well-Known Member

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    im so sorry sweetie dont give up ive had 3 mc before this one you will have your baby stay strong xxxx
     
  8. Bec L

    Bec L Proud mum to 2 girls/1boy

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    So sorry for your loss :(
     
  9. mummy2010

    mummy2010 mum of 1 and expecting

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    im really sorry to hear of your loss xx
     
  10. tinadecember

    tinadecember Mummy to Evie and TTC

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    so sorry to hear your sad news hun :( when i had my loss in April the day of my d&c they did one final scan just to be sure, so i think they will probably scan you once more. if they dont then im sure if you ask to be scanned again just so theyre 100% it shouldnt be a problem x
     
  11. khegidio

    khegidio Well-Known Member

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    I am very sorry for your loss. Don't give up hope. :flower:
     
  12. alibaba24

    alibaba24 Well-Known Member

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    Hi iv had this happen too i wasnt offered a scan before my D&C I think as you say they tried for ages to get a HB then they possibly feel like they have done enough? Although all hospitals are different they may offer you another scan, but like you say hun if they see that the sac is collapsing then dont tear yourself to bits thinking you are killing your baby with the D&C that is not the case it has been natures way this time :(:( I know once i had a d&c i felt alot better as it gave me closure i knew i wasnt carrying the baby around anymore or letting it drag on for weeks and having the visual trauma of things coming away. I know a D&C Seems awful but it some ways it does ease the pain too :hugs::hugs:

    xx
     
  13. ladypotter

    ladypotter Three Girls!!!

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    So sorry to hear about your news. I have had to go through that as well, My second loss, I was pg and the baby died at 7wks and I ended up actually not loosing him/her until 9wks, so carried the baby for 2 weeks before I finally passed him/her. That is why I chose the D&C last time (4th loss), because of the pain (emotional) I was dealing with. All I can say is that keep trying and keep on the Dr's to help you...I did. HUGE HUGS!!! :hugs:
     
  14. hayley x

    hayley x 1AngelSon,1EarthDaughter

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    I'm so sorry to read this :( my sister had a mmc and they re scanned her the day she was having her D&C :hugs: xxx
     
  15. bunnyg82

    bunnyg82 Mum to 2 gorgeous boys

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    I am so sorry :hugs: x
     
  16. smidgen

    smidgen Mummy 2 Finlay & 4 angels

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    just wanted to say thanks again ladies for all your support. can't believe I've got to sit here for another 24hrs before I get the d & c - this has felt like the longest 4 days of my life.
     
  17. babybeemac

    babybeemac Well-Known Member

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    So sorry to hear your sad news smidgen. Keeping you in my thoughts and I wish you all the best. Keep strong xxx
     
  18. Katherine

    Katherine Well-Known Member

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    Sorry for you loss, hun:hugs:
     
  19. smidgen

    smidgen Mummy 2 Finlay & 4 angels

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    just wanted to say thanks again for all your support, am also getting support from the ladies on the miscarriage support forum. i don't think i would be able to cope without the support from you all - its been keeping me going - will no doubt be on here until i go to hospital tomorrow for my d & c
     

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