Share your Crazy TTC rituals

Oh wow, you just pointed out something I didn't realize I was doing lol
:blush: I too have become a boob poker
 
My stories are this:
Wake up ridiculously early, any day of the 2 ww. Bleary eyed, make my way to the bathroom. Find the plastic pee cup, aim my stream in there, being careful not to fall asleep on the job and flood the cup - or even drop the cup in the toilet. :oops:


Rip open as many HPT's brands as I could find, dip them one by one. Up to the max line for as long as it takes for the dye to start processing on the screen.
Lay the test flat on my knee as I continue to just sit there. No wiping, no poo - just sit there, trying to open my eyes for longer than a second. :lol:

Doze for a minute or two, look at the test. Blurgh. No test line. Let me close my eyes, rub them for a minute and wake up properly to look properly, I'm sleep blind. :lol: Looks again, still no test line.
Take 20 pictures and edit each within the time frame, tweak the crap out of them with as many photo / test checking apps as I have virtually possible on my iPhone. If one app missed it - the other might not? :lol: :oops:

Admit defeat, nothing there in any of the apps, invert the best picture - accept nothing is there.
Shamelessly wipe my fu fu, then try to get up, knees are red from leading on them. Legs gone dead. Steady myself up, holding onto the sink. Flush and wash hands. Throw the test in the bin in disgust, claiming 'what does it know' or just putting it down to 'it's too early, being only 3dpo'.

Open door, back to bed to find future husband awake and asking if I'd had a 'nice sh!t?' :oops: Shamelessly agreeing it was a nice sh!t because if he knew you were peeing on sticks at only 3dpo - he'd go mad. :lol: :oops:

Continue the day, making sure to repeat most of the above steps.
Repeat it all again tomorrow. :lol:
 
Lol. I don't make myself that crazy. I stopped trying to test in the am like month 2. If I know I'm testing in the am I have a sleepless night and have to get up and pee all night because I can't hold it.
 
Lol Lost...Let me check my book...Sleep walking:thumbup:
Sleep talking :thumbup:
...hmmm...can't seem to find Sleep POAS...You win:flower:
I don't want to test until FMU tomoro am...9dpo...but my alter ego is trying to convince me that night of 8dpo is close enough hehe
:muaha:
 
And just like that in reading this I realize I'm not alone... oh I farted and blinked an eye.
. That's totally a sign right!!!!! Lmao
 
Anyone else stress about their bbt looking great?! Honestly I almost always get a drop 4-7 dpo for one day.... So i wait for that, then panic then Google early implantation then stress it won't go back up then when it does I keep checking if it's triphasic...and jeez every month it stresses me out haha. But it stresses me even worse the thought of not doing my temps!
 
Every month i promise myself im not going to temp after i know ive ovulated cos it sends me crazy. i get stupidly stressed when i start to see it drop a couple days before af. i dont do tests cos ill only do one when im a day late but i wish i could leave my bbt alone too. cos then id at least have hope until she shows rather than the awful stress watching my temps go down. but i just cant. arhhhhh
 
I, too, have become a book poker. Maybe they are only soar because I keep poking them? lol.
Currently I am using this site (https://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/tools/pregnancy_test_calculator.php) a few times a day. I feel like its my coach to try and encourage me not to test too early, lol.
 
I also am a bad symptom spotter. Pre-ovulation I can have the same symptoms but since I KNOW I am not pregnant I don't think anything of it. Post-O I am like "oh I felt a twinge, wonder if that means something". It's annoying because you can get through a day without over analyzing SOMETHING.

Yesterday's obsession was slight breast tenderness (very slight). Today's obsession is my cervix position. I checked it this morning and it was really high BUT 1. I don't normally check it in the am and 2. I don't normally track or check it so I don't know where it usually in in this point in my cycle. So therefore the information is useless but.....
 
Oh and another thing I do is tease hubby. When he makes me do something I don't want I say "You are going to make your pregnant wife do <fill in the blank>" It's all in good fun so hubby just rolls his eyes and kisses me because he wants me to be pregnant as much as I do.
 
:rofl:
And just like that in reading this I realize I'm not alone... oh I farted and blinked an eye.
. That's totally a sign right!!!!! Lmao

LOL MissMcCoy!
Preggo fart... Check:thumbup:
Preggo blink...Check:thumbup:
Now we just need a definite breath In and Out for final confirmation...please advise when this is noted :rofl:
 
Lost Lol
well...sadly...just reading this thread I have developed a new obsession:
{clears throat} Hear ye Hear ye...From this day forth allllll hpts shall be placed upon white toilet paper, for triple reassurance that the test manufacturer's idea of white...isss truly Thus...That is all, carry on!
 
Hahaha I thought this thread was gonna be about like drinking grapefruit juice from AF to ovulation, then eating pineapple core after ovulation, and then daily pelvic massages after that. I've definitely read threads where women do a variety of things before ovulation, and a whole other set of things after ovulation, I don't know if I could do it!

I had been obsessively checking symptoms but by now (3rd cycle) I've given up because the first 2 cycles I had quite a lot of symptoms but bfn so uh ANYTHING GOES then. :shrug: One ritual I started was checking my wipes and underwear VERY CLOSELY for implantation spotting. However I seriously thought I saw spotting last month but sadly bfn so maybe I'm now seeing spots in TWW :wacko:

Also every time my period starts, it usually starts very light at first, so I like run to the bathroom hourly to see if it's gotten heavier or maybe stopped. My coworkers must think I have some sort of problem going to the bathroom so frequently. I don't want to waste money on tests so I'd actually like to wait for AF.

I swear to myself this TWW I'm going to act normal. It's probably starting tmr so... :coffee:
 
Lol psycho
Surely you can't be Boring thru 2ww with that user name hehe
You just reminded me about implant bleed.
I've only had it once that I noticed cpl cycles ago.
However THIS cycle I wiped the other day and (in slow mo) thought I saw a flash of pink on the TP as it fell from my hand into to toilet... :blush:
I immed went to grab it from the yellow toilet water and stopped myself a hair short, stopped, reached again, stopped then just did a finger check...
Funny how pee on my hand would be so EW any time other than the 2ww as I have been handling and disassembling pee sticks and such...luckily sanity prevailed with the toilet scene since there was no bleeding LOL
 
My OH was reading this thread he thinks we're all psycho...
 
Lol psycho
Surely you can't be Boring thru 2ww with that user name hehe
You just reminded me about implant bleed.
I've only had it once that I noticed cpl cycles ago.
However THIS cycle I wiped the other day and (in slow mo) thought I saw a flash of pink on the TP as it fell from my hand into to toilet... :blush:
I immed went to grab it from the yellow toilet water and stopped myself a hair short, stopped, reached again, stopped then just did a finger check...
Funny how pee on my hand would be so EW any time other than the 2ww as I have been handling and disassembling pee sticks and such...luckily sanity prevailed with the toilet scene since there was no bleeding LOL

Hahaha that's great!
 

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