Should I return to work?

[Elphaba]

OK, I know you can't actually make the decision for me - that has to be me! - but I just wanted to get it down on paper to help me see more clearly and see what thoughts others had too.

My maternity leave finishes in August and, although my pay finishes, in May, I'll be taking the full amount of time allowed. But the question is whether I go back at all. I'm heavily leaning towards not going back at the moment but it does seem like such a big/scary decision to make. It's kind of nice being in the limbo land of maternity leave - you don't have to go to work but you still officially have a job if you want it

Anyway, I've divided the 'facts' up into reasons for staying home and reasons for going back to work.

Reasons to be a SAHM:
* I don't dislike my job, but don't enjoy it that much either;
* Childcare in my area is actually slightly more than than my net pay after travel costs - if I worked 3 days a week, I would probably be around £50-£60 worse of a month than not working;
* Travel time by public transport to my current job is 1.5 hours each way, making for a long day. If I learnt to drive, it would reduce it to 45 mins each way but would then either mean DH had to catch public transport, lengthening his day, or that we'd have to pay to buy/run a second car purely for this purpose.
* I'd miss being with my LO if I went back;
* DH earns significantly more than me (like 4-5 times as much!) which means we can live on his salary alone and also means we wouldn't be eligible for tax credits etc.

I guess the flip side arguments are:
* In this poor economic climate, it might be hard for me to find another job in the future, especially with a gap of a few years on my CV (just how many years is likely to depend on whether we end up having a second child);
* It would be nice to have some time to do something that's just about me for my sanity and confidence - however I guess this does not need to be a job as it coudl be a night class or some volunteering or something else.

So, WWYD?

 

[littleblonde]

im a stay at home and love it. Probably good job i handed in my notice cause i would fo gone back to work pregnant agagin (not planned). My oh earns 17000 as year and i get around £350 a month between tax credits and child beneifit. Add in the tiiny bit of housing benefit i get. Im only bringing in just over 100 less a month than when i worked (i did 4 days a week) , whoch i could easily lose in childcare costs. i have made that money up by not eatting lunch out with work, travel costs , better shopping (as in i plan what we are having , make a list and stick to it) . We still have occasional treats as well. Although i would do without them. the benefits are being with my girl everyday, watching her and helping her grow. having time to look after the house. Meaning that when oh has days off we can have family time. there was never a question of me working (not that i have any bad opinion on people that do) but i didnt have a carear and for me i didnt want my babys 1st to be seen by someone but me. I will work agagin one day. But for now im happy.

 

[Kitten-B]

If I was in your position I would absolutely become a SAHM! I would love to do it but there is no way we can afford it. If I was going to actually be better off NOT working then I would absolutely do it! I'm not keen on my job either although probably dislike it more than you and it would be such a joy to instead spend every day with LO and not miss a thing.

Full time childcare here is about £800 pcm. I'm planning to go back PT and parents will have LO 1 day a week. 2 days childcare a month, after maximising childcare vouchers will cost us £190 a month. I won't earn a lot doing 3 days but it is considerably more than that.

 

[Sarahkka]

Unless you absolutely loved your job (and you say you could take it or leave it), if you are paying to go to work, I think you've got all the economic answer you need.
The job situation/global economy will eventually improve. You will find something. Don't worry about it.
Use the mama time to enjoy your baby and figure out a job prospect for the future that makes you really really happy.
That's what I would do in your shoes!

 

[Elphaba]

Thanks ladies!

I'm almost certain I'm going to decide to be a SAHM. It's just a bit scary to make the decision IYSWIM.

 

[hulahoop09]

If i was you i would deffo be a sahm! Unfortunately there is no way we could live on just hubbys wage so i will have to go back at least on reduced hours and cant afford childcare so parents will have to watch lo.

 

[Elphaba]

If i was you i would deffo be a sahm! Unfortunately there is no way we could live on just hubbys wage so i will have to go back at least on reduced hours and cant afford childcare so parents will have to watch lo.

Thanks, hun! We are in a situation where there is a MASSIVE difference in DH's income and mine - so where mine is low enough that childcare would eat it up, his is high enough we can all live on it. We don't have family local, so no chance of parents as childcare. And even if they were local, I know that neither set would want to do it on a regular basis anyway (they love their grandkids but are very much of the opinion that they have done their bit raising kids and don't want to do it again, which is fair enough).

 

[hazzabeanie]

i would be a SAHM if i was in your postition!! for me tho me n oh only justs urvive on both wages so would bno way survive on one, i have a nanny looking after ds 5 mornings a week and my mum watches him 5 afternoons a week, i wish i could stay at home but i have to what i can to get by, so i would def take the opurtunity if you are in the postition to be able too!! xxx

 

[Elphaba]

Thanks hazzabean! I love the pic of your little boy in your avatar by the way!