sick of peoples optomism

[barrowland]

im i a lot of pain, im very uncomfortable and if i hear one more person who HAS NEVER HAD CHILDREN turn around and tell me that 'it'l be worth it in the end' im going to snap, they dont know if im in pain because something is wrong, they dont understand how uncomfortable it is being pregnant because to them all you get is a bit of back pain and swollen ankles and i know thats what they believe because they told me to stop complaining about my sciatica because its nothing! NOTHING! apparently i have to be happy all the time im sick of them telling me 'oh youl be fine when shes here' well shes not here right now is she, shes still inside making me uncomfortable and putting me through alot of pain... if they had children or were pregnant i wouldnt be annoyed but they have no idea what its like to them its all lovely shiney happy moments

 

[Jojo-Mummy]

I know, Im sure some poeple say it with the intention of pointing out how lucky we are.

Yes I know im lucky but that doest take the pain I have from my SPD away grrr

 

[Minnie_me]

I lost count of the number of people I would have hit had I had the strength or the ability to lift my head out of a bucket when they gave their 'professional' view on my hyperemesis. Ignore the know-alls Hun. X

 

[2016]

I also have sciatica and SPD and think that phrase "it will be worth it" and also "not long now" should be banned! It also pees me off when people who've had easy pregnancies cone out with "oh I had backache in pregnancy, it's not that bad"...

THIS IS NOT JUST 'BACKACHE' YOU FOOL! THIS IS ME CRAWLING ABOUT CRYING IN AGONY UNABLE TO WALK!!!!!!!!!

Some people!

 

[barrowland]

well atleast im not the only one... im going to flip at the next person who says it to me

 

[Nervous_1]

Had my last day at work yesterday and my colleagues wanted me to walk to a pub which, for them, is a 5 min walk from the office. When I said I couldn't walk that far they were like "but you walk to/from the train station each day which takes 15 mins". Yes, I do walk that but it takes me half an hour (or more!) due to spd and when I arrive I want to cry so I try not to do any other walking during the day as this seems to help.

Makes me mad that people think only of themselves. Even my OH says things like this, or goes storming off ahead when I'm waddling along painfully slowly. Then he gets annoyed cos he has to wait for me to catch him up!! I'm seriously considering getting a flashing neon sign that says "I'm slow and don't want to walk far....deal with it!"

 

[joven]

I can't comment on pain but I know how you feel when you feel like crap and people try to jolly you.
I feel the same about punching the next person to tell me to 'embrace it' and 'enjoy it' oh and 'I bloomed when I was pregnant!' I think of these comments usually when my head is over the bath and I'm vomiting into my hair as I'm trying to wash it thinking 'oh yeah great! This is fab!'
Big hugs hun xxxx

 

[barrowland]

yea! it would love it if they just said they couldnt understand or something and i hate peoples ignorance, im sat here very uncomfortable with pains as my OH and his brother are playing on COD very loudly while i just want to relax... and his sister is coming round too, i dont want a flat full of people while im in pain its not fair that his family dont just fuck off im sick of them being round all the time im so stressed because of it all and im getting snide remarks off OH when hes asking if he can do anything for me andi say no all i get is "well i only asked"

 

[whoops]

Sorry you're feeling bad

To be fair to them though, I can kind of understand where they're coming from. It's very hard to know what to say to someone who's talking about how much pain they're in or how uncomfortable they are - I know I've used phrases like 'not long now' and 'it'll be worth it' to friends of mine who've been struggling near the end because I just don't know what else to say.

Whenever I say my back is hurting, my mum answers along the lines of 'it'll be worse in a couple of months!' For some reason, her lack of sympathy actually makes me laugh but I doubt other people would find an answer like that funny.

 

[barrowland]

yeah id understand for them to say something like that if i had gone to them personally and talked about it but most of these people are just saying it to me because they asked me OH how i was doing or asked my mum and then pop up on facebook saying i heard your having pain but itl be worth it or i heard your getting a bit irritable these days waiting for LO wont be long now... its because they are random and i never tell them personally that im having these pains

 

[whoops]

Ok - yeah, that would do my head in! I hate when people comment on things that they've heard from someone else.

 

[barrowland]

haha yup, i just hate how everyone has a professional opinion on something they know nothing about... i dont look for sympathy but i also dont look for people opinions

 

[whoops]

Everyone turns into an expert when you're pregnant! I've chosen to not drink coffee as much as possible, but one of my friends is adamant that I'm not allowed have any coffee at all - I feel like correcting her every time she says this and telling her that it's my choice not to drink it because I've gone off it, not because it's forbidden.

A tiny little thing but so irritating.

 

[barrowland]

yeah one of my friends did this, iv completely quit smoking and drinking but said if i wanted to maybe once a month i would have one glass of red wine (i dont want to but its allowed) and he told me that i would have a miscarriage if i did which upset me! and the coffee thing i have one cup every blue moon and i got told that it will make my baby be stupidly skinny at birth... these people dont have a clue! if i drank huge amounts then fair enough but i dont grrrrr i hate people who dont have a clue