so nervous about birth

[rubywoo77]

This is my first and the thought of giving birth petrifies me - I was my sister's birthing partner and she did it with Gas and Air and shot of pethidine but towards the end it was really difficult to watch her in so much pain. She was a trooper though and I was so proud of her for the way she handled it.

I admire the ladies planning on doing it with just gas and air or nothing at all but for me I think I will want to be as drugged up as possible - but even that freaks me out. Generally just the thought of being in pain and being helpless or maybe not even able to vocalise my requests (basically at the mercy of the hospital/MW's/OH) is freaking me out.

 

[Lorien]

I'm going to try not to have an epidural as I don't like the statistics: longer births, more epesiotimies, more tearing, more c-sections etc. and I don't want an urethral catheter either!

However, my midwives and doula are all VERY good and I've discussed my requests with them -- even if I am not able to vocalize, I don't feel I will "be at their mercy" as they know exactly what I want from labour.

I second (or third) the motion of taking pre-natal classes that emphasise removing fear and increasing sense of agency in the birthing woman -- it sounds flaky but I've heard it's really valuable.