So sick of other people's comments

[Ashla]

I was at a function yesterday and the topic came around to whether I was having a boy or girl (my eldest is a boy) and when I said this one was also a boy, these are the comments I got:
"Two boys, you are going to be busy."
"Oh no, two boys, you are going to be exhausted."
I replied that I thought it would lovely for my eldest to have a brother and that hopefully they would be great friends. And someone else said:
"Yes, but you need to have a girl next, to balance things out."
and someone else said ominously,
"Yes, they are going to get into so much trouble together."

Arghhhh!!!

At first I told people I didn't know what I was having because I didn't want to hear their rude comments about two boys but that just meant they just told me how much they hoped I'd have a girl and that two boys would be awful.

I feel like saying to all these stupid people "I never imagined having even one boy. For as long as I've wanted a baby, I've wanted a girl. So can you please stop making me feel even worse about it?"

But of course you can't say that because then everyone tut tuts and tells you that you should be grateful to be having a healthy baby (which I am, of course).

I wish they'd all just leave me alone.

 

[bassdesire]

You get that no matter what.

Scenario 2 boys--what you got
Scenario 2 girls--omg are you serious? Yikes, omg I'm glad I didn't have two girls what drama........etc etc etc
Scenario 1/1--oh good, you're done then, of course!

It's never a win!!

God forbid you have a third--oh, you're trying for a boy? Oh you're trying for a girl?

If you get another so you have three of a kind--omg. Are you going to keep trying? Better be done now looks like you're doomed for all girls/boys

If you get a 2-1 combo--oh good now you are realllllllllly done. Good thing you got what you wanted this time.....

 

[Ashla]

I love the 'you should try for a girl next time' comments.
Because, you know, DH and I obviously just didn't put our minds to it this time. But next time, if we actually TRY, we'll obviously get the girl we want. Ugh.

Why the hell can't people just remember their manners and say something like "A boy? How lovely." ??

Some days I can handle it, but other days it just hammers home all my feelings of GD and almost drives me to tears.

 

[bassdesire]

Yep. I got so many comments. Like the only reason we had a third is because we obviously wanted a boy. It's annoying!!!!!!

I wish I would have heard awwwww, two girls! Fun!! That's all.

 

[Misscalais]

I totally agree with you on that.
I really hate the 'oh another boy, that's a shame you didn't get a girl this time. Maybe next time' aaahhhh! I got that heaps with DS2 and it near broke my heart. Like they were disregarding him because he is another boy. Sure I did want a girl the 2nd time round but he's an amazing, sweet kind hearted little boy I'd have him no other way.
If this one is a boy I think I will high five someone in the face if I get any negative comments. 1. Because no child should be disregarded because of gender. 2. I will have GD if bub is a boy because I do want a girl BUT baby is loved no matter what and I just don't want it rubbed in my face.

 

[Ashla]

Exactly! Like I said, I only ever imagined myself having girls and was so upset when I found out that DS1 was a boy. But I am becoming increasingly more indignant at the way people feel they can speak about boys. Why do so many people think it is ok to say how terrible little boys are?

Now that I have a little boy, I have realised how wonderful (and sweet and cheeky and vulnerable and brave and loving) they are and I feel very lucky to be welcoming another into my family. But I do feel sad for the girl I will never have. And I just don't think it is fair to either my sons or me that people feel they can say how disappointing it is I'm having another boy

 

[lau86]

Yuck don't people know the ONLY correct thing to say is "how lovely!". I agree with bass desire, I think people do it no matter what you're having. I'm having my second boy and people have actually asked me if I would've preferred a girl. I mean WTF?? I would've like a girl, but No I prefer this little baby I'm carrying!!!
If I was having a girl I would get pissed off at the 'one of each' comments too!!