So, tested at 8dpo...

[Suki73]

Morning Ladies

I finally caved this morning and tested at (I think) 8 days po. The biggest of Big Fat Negatives

I know it's a bit early but tbh it was an outside chance. It's our first month not using bc and we happened to dtd during what I thought was a fertile window. I then had some funny symptoms (sudden cold which vanished as soon as it arrived; pain on left side of pelvis, sharp and intermittent for 16 hours; wave of nausea; strange dragging pain in back). I now think those symptoms were a delayed ovulation. This whole experience has clarified a few things for me though:

1. I do actually want to get pregnant and am in a suitable situation (i.e. happy in my relationship to a wonderful guy who wants babies!) to get pregnant for the first time in my life. At age 38 But better late than never, right?

2. I need to start tracking my cycles properly. I have always been aware of the fact that they are approximately 28 days long, but you girls on here are pro's when it comes to stuff like BBT; OPK etc. etc.

3. I have to try not to worry about it. Easier said than done.

I'd be really grateful for any tips you might be able to give me (apart from having lots of obviously ) Is it worth doing the OPK's?

Lots of luck to everyone still in the race this month! x

 

[Macwooly]

Sorry about your BFN but still so early so you never know

I don't use OPKs but have started temping this month -still a novice though. I also use a CBFM and love it but again my first month using it but so easy and I'm not having to try and read an OPK first thing in the morning when it is all I can do to focus on reading my temp

You will get loads of advice and support from the fab ladies in this section

Still keeping FXed for you this cycle

 

[Natsby]

8 is too early to test really.. but then I did the same thing this month so I understand why. I think it is a good idea to temp for a couple of cycles just to be clear about what you body is up to, it´s amazing how much you learn, I didn´t even know I was so ignorant until I did it then I thought, why didn´t we learn this is school.
My advice is don´t expect anything to happen fast, it may and if it does great but if you expect it all quick and it takes a year you will be stressed and dispointed every month for a year. And secondly, and I want you to listen carefully because I know I´ve said it before on here, Do not symptom spot!! it is a pointless and unhelpful habit which can drive you nuts. There you go that is my pennies worth, go girl and good luck.

 

[Macwooly]

Natsby is right about the symptom spotting. I did it last cycle and drove myself nuts and I started to do it on 1dpo but managed to stop halfway through 2dpo and feel so much calmer especially as half the BFP stories I hear have no symptoms at all

 

[Suki73]

Thanks Macwooly and Natsby

It's so nice to be able to chat with women who are in the same age bracket and ttc! All I seem to see around me are gals in their twenties or early thirties with large bumps (do they come out when the weather improves? )

Point taken about the symptom spotting - it is almost designed to drive you around the bend! I was a little peeved with myself for having done the test this a.m. but not at all surprised to see the BFN and minimally disappointed because of not exactly trying too hard.

Natsby, I think I will probably start to do the temperature check - as you say it's bound to be educational. I've noticed a drop in my cm since I passed 35 which concerns me a bit. It's still there on ovulation but much less abundant, so I think it's wise to try tracking. Yes, we could have done with learning this stuff in school - but then my sex education consisted of "dont' get pregnant OR ELSE!!!!"

Thanks again and loads of luck to both of you this month

 

[Suki73]

Macwooly, wher did you get your temping thermometer & charts? I am so ignorant about all of this...

 

[NorthStar]

Welcome Suki73. There is a crowd on ebay who sell all the kit called fertilityplan, and you can also buy it off amazon.

 

[Suki73]

Thanks Northstar - will check it out

 

[sarahincanada]

8dpo is waaayyyyyyyy to early, the embryo probably hasnt implanted yet for it to secrete hcg.
if you look here 71.4% pregnant women got a bfn at 8dpo!
https://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/pregnancy-test/dpo-chart.php?dpo=8

as for tips definitely get a therm and start charting.... that and the ov tests are a great combo. the ov tests will give you a warning that ovulation is about to happen and the temps should confirm ovulation has taken place after. the reason you should do both is because ov tests can only detect your LH surge before ovulation but wont tell you if you definitely ovulated. Charting wont warn you ovulation is coming but you will see a rise in temp the day after ovulation so you know its happened. They say its the BDing the days BEFORE ovulation that are successful, so its good to know before you are ovulating so definitely recommend the ov tests.

also register on fertilityfriend.com and set up a chart then just record the temp every day. It will take you a while to understand fertility friend, I know it did with me, but once you understand its fun to look at your chart and learn about your cycle.

good luck!!

 

[Macwooly]

Suki - I brought my BBT off eBay It did come with a chart but I'm using the chart on Fertility Friend. You can sign up for free whilst learning the ropes. It offers a brilliant course. I stupidly didn't study the course before temping but I am currently studying the course now

And don't worry about asking questions regarding temping I probably can't answer your questions as I'm a real novice but so many ladies on this site are experts are charting and are so willing to give advice, share knowledge or give support

I'm really rooting for you though and hope that even if this isn't your cycle then you'll see your BFP soon

 

[Suki73]

Sarah,

Aah, that clears that up then - I always wondered what the difference was between using the OPKs and the charting. I had read about two-three days before ovulation being the optimal time for bd - guess it gives the little wrigglies a chance to get in position

Best of luck to you too!

 

[Suki73]

p.s. It's interesting about 8 days po being too early to test. I guess I won't write myself off completely this month yet...

 

[Suki73]

Thanks Macwooly - I will definitely do that - I need all the information I can get What did women do before the internet? lol

Actually I popped into Boots and lunchtime and bought their charting kit, so I'll see how I get on with that. No time like the present, eh?

Rooting for you too!

 

[dachsundmom]

Good luck! I would also suggest that if you decide to buy the internet cheapies (IC) for OPKs, keep in mimind that they work differently than an HPT. Two lines does not mean positive and you might see a faint second line all month, I do. The test line has to be as dark or darker than the control line to be considered positive. They can get tricky to read, but once you see that positive, you'll know! Lol.

Best wishes.

 

[sarahincanada]

Sarah,

Aah, that clears that up then - I always wondered what the difference was between using the OPKs and the charting. I had read about two-three days before ovulation being the optimal time for bd - guess it gives the little wrigglies a chance to get in position

Best of luck to you too!

just to let you know some people have a short LH surge....for example I often get my positive ovulation test on the same day I seem to ovulate, as my temps go up the next day. so thats a short window and not too much warning. because of this I try to BD every other day from CD8, and as soon as I get my positive ovulation test I BD that night and the next day. If you just wait for your positive ovulation test and not BD before you might miss it, so I would suggest trying to BD earlier on in your cycle too

 

[sarahincanada]

Good luck! I would also suggest that if you decide to buy the internet cheapies (IC) for OPKs, keep in mimind that they work differently than an HPT. Two lines does not mean positive and you might see a faint second line all month, I do. The test line has to be as dark or darker than the control line to be considered positive. They can get tricky to read, but once you see that positive, you'll know! Lol.

Best wishes.

this is the reason I use the digital ovulation tests....with the internet cheapies I worry that I might not know what my positive was until after it starts to fade and could be too late. Ive heard of lots of women never getting a really strong positive on them. I dont want any 'what ifs' around ovulation so I think its worth to spend the extra $$ on the digital. Fertility friend on ebay sells 20 sticks the same price as 7 are here in Canada so I order from them. That lasts me 3 months.

 

[dachsundmom]

Good luck! I would also suggest that if you decide to buy the internet cheapies (IC) for OPKs, keep in mimind that they work differently than an HPT. Two lines does not mean positive and you might see a faint second line all month, I do. The test line has to be as dark or darker than the control line to be considered positive. They can get tricky to read, but once you see that positive, you'll know! Lol.

Best wishes.

this is the reason I use the digital ovulation tests....with the internet cheapies I worry that I might not know what my positive was until after it starts to fade and could be too late. Ive heard of lots of women never getting a really strong positive on them. I dont want any 'what ifs' around ovulation so I think its worth to spend the extra $$ on the digital. Fertility friend on ebay sells 20 sticks the same price as 7 are here in Canada so I order from them. That lasts me 3 months.

You are spot on! I am going to use the IC and digi this month. I have some cheapies left, so I figured I would test their reliability. Good luck to you this cycle!

 

[Suki73]

Thanks ladies!

It's all new to me (before this I was doing everything I could NOT to get pg. lol isn't it funny how quickly things change? ) but hope I'll get the hang of it soon. Thanks also for the tips about fertilityfriend, which I was not aware of!

 

[velo]

Thoughts:
- 8 dpo is too early to test. Best to wait until you miss your AF - easier said than done and I often cave early. But keep in mind whatever day you are testing at you aren't out until the arrives - many get a late :BFP:.
- Sign up for a free account at fertilityfriend.com is an easy way to track your temperature, which will tell you when you have ovulated after the fact. You'll need a BBT thermometer (preferably digital)
- If you are having intercourse every other day or more you probably don't need to predict ovulation in advance
- otherwise its good to know when to time it - OPK can be useful but some women miss their surge (ie it always shows up as -) and sometimes the advance notice is pretty slim.
- Checking your cervical mucus is a good way to see when you are getting more fertile - when it becomes watery, have . If you see EWCM (egg white cervical mucus) - the really stretchy stuff, definitely have !
- Were you using the pill for BC? If so I have read that it can dry up the crypts that produce the CM - I have noticed much less CM post-pill than pre-pill. It can take time for that to be restored.
- It may take a while for your cycles and hormones to normalize after the pill (but I am assuming here bc=the pill when you could have been using a barrier method instead)
- Chances of conceiving at our age are around 15-20% per cycle even if everything is perfect, so don't be discouraged after the first month! After a while odds will be on your side!

 

[Suki73]

Hi Velo

Thanks for all the useful info. I'm not up with the stats about conception at 38 (or any age for that matter). I think, like many convent-educated gals, I got it into my head at an early age that a man just has to look at you and you'll get pregnant and that's a difficult concept to root out! So its interesting to know that the odds are actually quite low per cycle.

Also interesting what you say about the pill drying up cm. I am unsuitable for the combined pill because of migraine and always used barrier methods and was extra careful so never had any accidents. About a year and a half ago started taking the mini pill since it is more reliable in women over 35 and I was sick of using other bc methods. The mini didn't agree with me - I was constantly bleeding and quite depressed and had unbelievably sore bbs - so I came off that and it was back to barrier methods. My cycle started up again immediately. I hadn't connected the diminished cm to the pill, but I guess it is a possibility.We've only just decided to throw caution to the winds so I'll be curious to see what happens over the next months...I'm starting to record BBT just to give myself a handle on what my cycle is doing.

How long have you been ttc?